When you decide to spend the rest of your life with someone, you always assume that it’s going to be forever . You say “I do” in front of friends and family and profess your love for one another, and then you start the rest of your lives .
However, “the rest of your lives” oftentimes comes with problems, issues, and hiccups along the way. And, those problems can lead to resentment and wanting to totally leave your spouse .
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Some husbands are snakes.
“After being married for 40 years found out he stole close to $100,000 dollars from my retirement account (which he had access to because I loved and trusted him so much). He used it to pay for interactive internet porn with a 19-year-old for 3 years,” shared Pettyfan1234 .
Once in a while, they piss us off.
Sabres_Mom shared that sometimes, her husband pisses her off and makes her frustrated. When this happens, she thinks to herself “maybe I should have waited” before getting married. However, the “little things” he does oftentimes make up for it.
They need experience sometimes.
40ishboredpanda said that her husband had never had a “real girlfriend” before the two of them got married and she wishes that he had. There are so many things you learn from being with someone else and relationship rules you need to know.
Counseling can help.
catticus_thegrey shared that she has been married twice and is currently in mid-divorce with her second husband. She said that if you feel any doubts—wait. Also, seek counseling because having a third-party point of view can really open your eyes to a lot.
Work can get in the way.
“His job changed him. Made him more mentally abusive towards me. He’s not the same man I met nor even married. I can’t leave him because he’s so possessive and I have nothing. It’s a mess. I feel trapped. Luckily we have no kids,” shared marlasingaar .
Communication is key.
COLM5700 shared that she loves her husband, but she does picture what life would be like without him—and it doesn’t look bad. The two have very different styles of communication and it can make their marriage very, very hard.
You need to want the same things.
Toomanymisses said after 17 years of being with her partner, she feels like “something is missing.” They have become friends and roommates rather than being romantically involved. She also wants kids and her partner does not—which, can be a huge problem.
Some women daydream.
“Sometimes I think what it would be like to be married to other people. I’m lucky enough to have a lot of good men in my life. I look at the way they cook, interact with their kids, pursue their hobbies, and I think they would make great partners,” shared passthepepperplease .
Love dies.
BarefootandWild shared she is a stay-at-home mom and loves her children, but her husband has become “stale.” He is “emotionally abusive” and she is no longer in love with him. Even if he changed his ways, she says it wouldn’t matter because the love is totally gone.
Marriage can feel like a “business.”
Helpful_Stock said she got married when she was young and naive and she feels as though if she knew then what she knows now, she wouldn’t have gotten married to her husband. She said the two feel like “business partners” who raise their kids and keep the house running—nothing more.
Kids make it hard to leave.
“I wish I never got married. I don’t belong in a marriage (I like my own space, my husband is a republican redneck, he’s a big baby, and I generally do better without negative energy constantly swirling around me). But since we get along reasonably well enough to not damage our three tiny kids, I’m going to fake it to make it,” said HDL143 .
Some women regret marriage altogether.
reese120 said that she regrets ever getting married. She shared that her husband is mentally ill and so is his family, and it becomes very tiring to keep up with all of it. When he hugs her, she says she feels “nothing.”
Some women feel they cannot be themselves.
Emotional-Noise3179 shared that she could not be herself in her marriage and she wanted to live a life where she could. She wanted a divorce so she can get to a place where she is happier and more content with her life and herself.
When arguments become toxic.
peachmildy shared that when they do not communicate with each other well, she feels as though it becomes incredibly toxic. She wants to “leave” when it happens because she feels physically sick. If they could fix their miscommunications, they may have a chance.
In life, you can outgrow people.
squeezpleez shared that they have been married for almost 20 years and she feels as though they have simply “outgrown” each other. Unfortunately, they have been so used to being with each other and together, so it’s hard to separate.
