Who’s ready for a weird story?
Like, a really weird story?
Then you’re in the right place. This one is going to involve Dax Shepard, Jell-O, a lack of boundaries, and way too much information.
Let’s find out what happened when he stopped by Jimmy Kimmel.
Dax stopped by Jimmy Kimmel to talk podcasts
See, this interview starts out so innocently. Jimmy asks Dax about his podcast, Armchair Expert.
They just celebrated their one year anniversary, and have produced over 100 episodes for the show.
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Dax loves the podcast
Primarily because loves to share.
“I love it, because as you know about me, I’ll tell you anything.”
Jimmy agrees immediately, which means Jimmy has heard some things over the years.
Jimmy opens the door for him
“You do reveal things that are sometimes shocking. You’ve had an interesting life.”
Oh, here it comes. Here we go. We’re about to have Jell-O ruined for all of us forever.
Dax has had some interesting guests on the pod
And they all tell him that they’ll only be on it if he tells certain stories.
When Mila Kunis was on, she said that she would only do it if he told his Jell-O story.
So…here’s the Jell-O story.
Dax tries to sum things up in a nutshell, but Jimmy stops him.
“Not in a nutshell.”
So, he’s gonna just…tell the whole story. The whole Jell-O story. From start to finish. Details and all.
When Dax was younger, he loved a movie called “Real Genius”
Dax explains that there was a bad guy in the film that someone was talking to.
A character asks the bad guy, Kent: “Hey, Kent! What were you doing in your room, naked, with a bowl full of Jell-O?”
Fortunately, they didn’t have Jell-O at home
So he couldn’t try it.
However, that idea followed him for the next few years. Eventually, he was 20-years-old and living in LA…and he got bored one night.
Yup.
Choices got made that night
“[…] all the sudden, I go, ‘I have all the means I need. Like, I have a car, I got money…'”
So he headed to Save-On Drugstore, and wouldn’t you know it:
“They were slashing prices on Jell-O.”
He bought five boxes for $1
He got five, because he figured he’d love it so much that he’d want to do it again and again.
He went home and mixed up the Jell-O in a glass. However, the box said to wait 30 minutes to cool.
He waited the Jell-O out
And then it was showtime. Right there in the kitchen:
“I enter the Jell-O. And…within six seconds, I’m just sloshing around Kool-Aid. It disintegrates. I’m basically just stirring Kool-Aid.”
He was so disappointed (and embarrassed) that he put the glass in the sink and went to bed.
However, the next morning…
He realized that something dark had happened.
“I wake up the next morning, and I’m peeing, and I go, ‘Oh my goodness.’ Uh…the Jell-O has clung to an STD.”
I am also upset to have learned this, don’t worry.
He was convinced he had a STI
He didn’t know what kind, but he thought he had one.
He went to the LA free clinic. His doctor was an incredibly attractive, incredibly young woman.
There was no way he was telling her the truth
She was beautiful and near his age, so he decided he and his Jell-O could not be the story he told her.
He lied and said he and his girlfriend were experimenting with Jell-O in bed.
She decided to break the ice by asking him what flavor it was
He told her it was strawberry.
She said, “I like raspberry.”
According to Dax, “And I just got a 105% erection right in front of her face.”
I think we all saw that coming, didn’t we?
See the story for yourself, and get ready to relive this horrific tale again — but with sound.
You’ve been warned.
