No matter how boring or uneventful a day may be turning out to be, you can always count on the internet and the wonderfully bizarre people of planet Earth to brighten up your day.
So, from people who found their cats in some really weird jams to individuals who had to sacrifice their soul for the strangest of things, here are 20 times the hilarity could not be contained.
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“Runs and drives great!”
What they are not telling you about this is that this is actually an invisible truck and the tires are the things that need replacing. You could be the owner of the world’s first invisible truck today at a bargain price!
Patience Is Key!
Wow, that is one hell of a price for delivery. Was this item being brought to this person’s home upon the back of a solid gold chariot being pulled along by the reanimated corpse of Secretariat?
“The only baby picture I have… Why?”
From the fact that this is their only baby picture, one person accurately guessed that this person was the third child, before going on to point out:
“First child gets the handprints, the monogrammed clothes, the photo book, and the videos. Second child gets a few pictures. Third child is lucky to get the birth certificate!”
“Painted the road boss!”
Look, if there is one group of people that you do not want to get on the wrong side of then it is the Decaying Palm Tree Movers’ Union — the DPTMU for short. They are one hell of a ruthless bunch.
“Hold that thought.”
My God, the person who wrote this sign has just blown the entire universe wide open. One person did take this too far though, positing, “Cars are cup cup cups. Garages are cup cup cup cups. This universe is a cup cup cup cup cup.”
“I’ll sacrifice my soul for the toilet!”
There have been certain times in my life where I think that I would genuinely have sold my soul to Satan for the chance to use a toilet. Also, who really needs a soul anyway, it’s not like it does anything!
“Lately the bird food has been disappearing from the container inexplicably. We just found the culprit.”
He looks so guilty! Someone with a similar experience added:
“My parents had this huge 5 gallon bucket full of sunflower seeds to feed the birds. It was a ton of seeds. They figured it would be safe because the bucket had a lid on it. Nope. They went to refill their bird feeders one day and it was empty. Some squirrel chewed through the top of it and managed to steal every single seed out of it.”
“Heard my cat screaming outside, found her stuck like this.”
As you can probably imagine, the person who posted this went on to write, “She appeared to be growing tired of me taking pictures so I got her down [immediately] after this.” I reckon she will be plotting her revenge already.
“My sister: ‘You can do the half-marathon with me! Trust me, it’s not that bad!'”
I do not know how anyone takes a good end-of-race picture! By the time I get to the end of a race my body is in absolute tatters, so the last thing that I can manage is smiling and trying to look photogenic!
“Seamless fix…”
It makes this amazing fix even better is that they decided to use purple paint to write the word “red” on there, not red paint. This could only have been made better if they had used blue paint for it.
“Penny showing off her empty yoghurt container, and no it wasn’t stuck.”
She looks so pleased with herself! Also, the fact that they added the “and no it wasn’t stuck” caveat on the end suggests that a fair few people have already told them, in a very judgmental tone, how they should have helped this poor dog.
“Restaurant puts Cocktails and Beers right under the Kids’ Menu!”
Maybe the alcoholic drinks in this establishment are exclusively for children who are aged ten and under? If you want a beer but you’re over 10, then you’re all out of luck! Mimosas go great with French Toast as well FYI!
“So close yet so far…”
Something tells me that this poor kid is currently working out the best way to build a ladder in order to get across that gap. Either that or he is thinking, “It probably isn’t that far to jump it, right?”
Does It Really?
It looks as though the people who made this may have been telling a few porky pies. Although, as was suggested by one very smart cookie, perhaps it can hold up to 1000 lbs over the course of its life…not all in one go.
“My new birth control comes in a plain white container and I had to decorate it.”
And decorate it they most certainly did! This is actually based upon an original piece of artwork by Joan Cornella Vázquez who is a Spanish cartoonist and illustrator. Although, most people will probably know this piece from its existence as a meme.
Just Stick With AirPods…
You just know for a fact that any father who saw this product will have made that age-old suppository joke, “For all the good that these ‘Assbuds’ have done me I may as well have shoved them up my arse.”
“You forgot to say goodbye!”
This dog looks like he has the perfect skill set to work for the church going door to door and asking if people want to hear about our Lord and Saviour. That is also one hell of a sizeable hole that they’re going to need to get patched up!
“My daughter had my wife’s phone on a long car ride. She ordered all the Barbie dream houses from Amazon.”
It looks like she may actually have ordered three of the same Barbie’s dream house, although that doesn’t seem to have dampened her mood any. I think that it might be time to change your Amazon account password.
“My wife has tried REALLY hard to get my cat to like her…”
You simply cannot force a cat into liking you, they either like you immediately or they hate you forever and ever and ever, that is just how cats work. No cat will bow down to a person’s wishes in such a manner!
“Someone relabelled the dead battery container.”
You just know that whoever added that sign on was absolutely made up with themselves when they thought of it. I can imagine whoever did it being absolutely desperate to be able to come forward and claim ownership over their abysmal dad joke.
