We blame Disney for making us think that being a princess was all ball gowns and fancy carriages.
As it turns out, being female royalty — like the Duchess of Cambridge or the soon-to-be Duchess of Sussex, Meghan Markle — involves a lot fewer gowns and a lot more rules.
Think you could hack it as a duchess? Let’s see how many of these rules you could handle.
1. Give up all other career goals, because being female royalty is a full-time job.
Meghan Markle had to have known that her acting career would be over the minute she got engaged to Prince Harry.
That’s because “Duchess” is more than just a royal title — it’s a job title. Duties include making public appearances, working with charities, looking elegant, etc.
2. Your grooming regimen is about to get very intense.
We all enjoy a little pampering now and then. But if want to be like the Duchess of Cambridge, then you’d better prepare yourself for approximately 156 salon visits per year .
That’s basically a salon appointment every other day.
At what point does getting your hair done go from a relaxing experience to a chore?
3. There’s a right and a wrong way to hold your handbag.
Actually, there are two right ways. The first is in one hand, with your arm on the side of your body. The second is with two hands, holding the bag in front of your body, as seen below.
This means that clutching your handbag under your arm is a no-go for female royalty.
4. You’ll need a secret code for whenever you’re leaving to use the bathroom at public events.
“I really gotta pee!” isn’t a sentence you’ll ever hear from the Duchess’ mouth.
If she needs to use the restroom at a dinner party, she’ll politely excuse herself from the table and lay her napkin flat beside her plate.
That way, people know where she’s off to without her having to say it.
5. Speaking of dinner parties, there are a few rules for eating.
If soup is being served, the Duchess is expected to take spoon scoops away from her.
And, of course, no slurping allowed.
6. There’s a polite eating practice for solid foods, as well.
The Duchess is expected to take no more than four bites of food before laying down her utensils.
Perhaps these pauses are so the Duchess can engage in polite conversation or appear more *sigh* “ladylike.”
Whatever the case, it sounds like a lot of math for dinnertime.
7. Say goodbye to pastel, neon, and dark nail polish.
Actually, say farewell to any nail polish color that isn’t a clear or nude tone. Royal women are expected to keep their fingernails as neutral as possible.
Are you thinking what we’re thinking? YAWN .
8. Are you a fan of wedge heels? Not anymore!
Word on the royal courtyard is that the Queen _ hates _wedge heels.
This may just be a rumor, although you’d be hard-pressed to find a photo of the Duchess wearing wedges in the Queen’s presence.
Coincidence? We think not.
9. About 90% of the skirts in your wardrobe are going to be below the knee in length.
Apparently, the Queen prefers knee-length skirts (at minimum) and dresses, which, as you’ve likely guessed, are considered more appropriate for female royalty.
At least the royals only have to shave their legs partway!
10. If you’re going to wear anything shorter, pantyhose is a must.
It may not be too difficult to spot Meghan Markle bare-legged, but the Duchess of Cambridge almost always wears pantyhose.
At royal events, however, the Queen expects all female royalty to wear a pair.
11. Don’t expect to be walking around with a tiara any time you please.
Tiaras can only be worn in the evening and only at formal events.
Plus, they’re only given to married women, so Meghan Markle will have to wait a bit longer before she tries one on.
12. Public displays of affection are strictly forbidden.
If you want to so much as hold your royal husband’s hand in public, you’d better forget about it.
Royal etiquette permits little more than an arm around each other, and even that’s rare.
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle might be slowly changing that rule, however.
13. When sitting down, you’ll need to do the “duchess slant.”
Much like dining or leaving to use the restroom, there’s a special way duchesses should sit.
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If you’re wearing a skirt, remember to keep your ankles together and slant your knees for maximum appropriateness.
14. Just because you’re feeling warm doesn’t mean you can take your jacket off in public.
Apparently, it’s not “ladylike” for a royal woman to remove clothing in public.
So, unless there’s a private area nearby where you can remove your coat, it’s staying on.
15. When the Queen finishes eating, so do you.
This is more of a general royal family rule, but it’s important for a duchess to know.
While dining with the Queen, you’re expected to mirror her every action. If she sits, so do you. If she stands, you get up from your chair.
And if she’s done her meal, you better stuff that last piece of cornbread into your pocket.
So, do you think you have what it takes to be a duchess?
If you’re willing to exchange some fashion and etiquette freedoms for the royal title (and all the perks that come with it), then you might just be able to hack it in the royal family.
