People like to say that women are ‘un-crack-able enigmas’ that men can never understand.
In certain circumstances, yeah, it’s difficult to know everything about another person’s resovoire of experience if your gender has dictated an entirely different experience through life.
However, this would mean that the reverse is true as well: men experience a lot that women don’t know about.
The guys of the internet recently took to Reddit to share some secrets, misunderstandings, and misconceptions regarding the male experience, and honestly, you may never look at the men in your life the same way again.
Hairy Styles
“I had a girl tell me that my hair-cut looked nice,” a man explains, “I’ve kept that same hair cut for four years since then. Comments like that really stick with us.”
Raining Men
“Just because we’re in the shower for an abnormally long time doesn’t mean we’re jerking off,” one guy clears up. “Guys like to have long hot showers too ya know.”
Take A Hint
“It’s not that we can’t take hints,” this man writes. “We are just afraid of looking too far into something. If someone is flirting with me I have the dilemma of ‘is she actually into me or is this just how her personality is?'”
Young Blood
“Boners don’t automatically mean arousal,” this guy confirms. “They just happen sometimes. That will never be said enough.”
Halfway There
“If you want something to happen between us, you gotta meet us half way,” one guy says. “If we’re not making a move, we are probably doing our best to not mess it up.”
XOXO
Think you’re the only one who fancies a loving squeeze? Think again.
“I like hugs…” one man admits.
Automatic Systematic
“We can’t move our penis without closing our butt hole,” one man explains. “It happens every. single. time.”
Sadie Hawkins
“Guys also like to be walked up to and asked out,” this guy writes. “Make the first move sometimes!”
Quite The Catch
“We desperately want you to toss us things instead of just handing them to us,” this man reveals. “Anything. Anything at all. We wanna catch stuff.”
The Witches Kiss
“I bet girls’ don’t know about this thing called the witches kiss,” one guy writes. “When your junk touches the toilet bowl while your taking a dump.”
Frame Of Mind
“The desire to touch the top of the door frame is a primal one,” this man says. “I can’t understand it, I just do it.”
Shake It Off
“Pee shivers are a thing,” a guy reveals. “Enough said.”
Right Back At You
“Compliments will last for weeks, months, even years,” this man says. “Guys are crazy for a simple ‘You’re hot’ or ‘You’re really handsome’ or something with their personality or looks.”
Taking Turns
“Sometimes we like to be the little spoon,” this guy writes. “I know, I know, but it’s true. It’s really nice.”
Care Bear
“If we have a goofy hobby and you take interest in it, even the slightest, we love it,” this guy reveals. “I’m a big gamer and my wife (who also games but not the same ones I play) will often watch what I’m doing, ask about the game, and generally take an interest.”
Body Conscious
“Men can have eating disorders and body positivity issues too,” one guy says. “I’ve struggled for years, and yet the few people that I do open up to about it just write it off as a phase or just forgetting to eat once in a while.
“But when girls come forward with the same issue it’s immediately addressed as a serious matter. And when the issue is talked about on a larger scale, men are rarely, if ever, included.”
One Trip
“If we haven’t carried in all the shopping in one go, we haven’t done it right,” this guy explains. “One. Trip. No more.”
Power Wash
“Sometimes we use the stream of our pee to try and clean poop stains on the bottom of toilet bowls,” one man reveals. “It’s very effective.”
Subtle Adjustments
“The occasional longer stride to attempt to inconspicuously adjust our balls.” This sounds legit. Much like how I will often stretch my arms and shoulders in hopes of subtly shifting my underwire.
Bathroom Etiquette
Men’s bathrooms aren’t a free-for-all according to this guy: “Only weirdos choose to piss in the urinal next to you when there are plenty of open urinals along the wall.
“Also if we have to use the toilet to piss, we tend to piss on the side of the bowl to make less noise.”
Active Listening
“When people come crying to us, our first inclination is to fix the problem,” one guy explains.
“Since this is (often) not possible, lead with something along the lines of ‘Can I vent for a minute?’ Or anything that signals to us this is just a time for active listening, rather than a problem solving session.”
Just Ask
“Your chances of getting what you want out of us are infinitely higher if you tell us directly.”
Preach.
Aiming Is Hard
“Just because I got pee on the wall, doesn’t mean I’m being lazy, it’s because it decided to come out a different direction than where the hose was pointed.”
Alone Time
“When we want to be alone, it’s not that we don’t want to be around you, it’s that we don’t want to be around anyone for a bit.”
This is also true for anyone introverted.
Acting “Like A Man”
“We feel a great social pressure to be strong, less emotional, carry others, make money,” another guy says, “A lot of times we don’t know how to. And we’re scared. But we know we’re not supposed to be, and we know we’re not supposed to ask for help. So we get stressed and angry.”
Towel Stand
“Every guy has, at one point, used their erection to hold up a towel upon exiting the shower with an unwanted erection.”
The Mask
“I’m secretly an emotional wreck,” one man admits. “I just hide it.”
The Meta Truth
“A lot of guys answering right now are on the toilet enjoying some quality time with Reddit. The bathroom is an experience for many men.”
The ‘Nothing’ Box
“Men have a box that our minds go into. It’s called the ‘Nothing Box,'” this guy writes. “So next time you ask a man what he’s thinking about and he answers with ‘nothing.’ There is a good chance he’s telling you the truth.”
h/t: Ask Reddit
