Imagine joining the Army in the 90s, a time when being openly gay was prohibited. You keep your secret hidden, only for it to be exposed by a roommate who later becomes an advocate for gay rights. This is the story of one man who was outed in the military and struggles to forgive the person responsible.
Joining the Army ️
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Secret Clearance ️
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Carlton’s Discovery
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Carlton’s Silence
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/209a58ec-e7b6-4c9d-b022-5c4431a06dae.png)
Harris’ Discovery and Betrayal
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Harris Spreads the Word
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Friendly Relationships Fade
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Harris Leaves the Unit ♂️
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/7e67489f-0f57-47fe-818f-61efe935917a.png)
Discovering the Truth
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/0fe1e404-ea15-4397-9e70-d379d8201f0c.png)
Accepting Discharge
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Feeling Guilty
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/c2f99a3a-cfce-4d4f-9592-6925f2554daf.png)
Harris’ Hypocrisy Unveiled
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/bafdd76e-576b-4675-9d8f-da354a7d7e91.png)
Harris’ Marriage
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Confronting Harris
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/f65f10ba-b8e1-425c-b840-85cba12df90f.png)
Harris’ Apology
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/350ff925-7ce6-4022-8d25-a6f137c210ce.png)
Unfriending Harris
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Forgiveness: A Struggle for the Betrayed
After confronting Harris about his hypocrisy, he admitted his wrongdoing and apologized. However, our protagonist couldn’t bring himself to forgive Harris, who had become an advocate for gay rights after outing him in the military. The betrayal left a deep wound, and the choice to forgive or not remains a struggle. Let’s see what the internet thinks of this situation… ️
Forgiving doesn’t mean trusting again, NTA for not forgiving.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/70a7b4f6-d3c6-4a56-8767-b54fcd2ae2c5.png)
Former roommates come to a mature understanding, but not everyone agrees

Choosing to forgive is a personal decision. NTA.

Former roommates debate cancel culture and forgiveness

Commenter sympathizes with OP’s situation and criticizes former roommate’s actions.

Choosing forgiveness: a powerful act of self-liberation ✌

Former roommate outed in army, no apology until called out

Army veteran sympathizes with both sides in forgiveness dilemma

Former roommate praised for outing army member sparks controversy

Former roommates feud after army outing

Former roommate’s activism can’t erase his past behavior. NTA.

Choosing to forgive after being outed in the army

Forgiveness in the face of betrayal

Moving on from past betrayal is hard, but forgiveness heals ✌️

Being outed is awful, but forgiveness is not obligatory
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/a5395a3a-b092-4ded-94db-88ff2e204b82.png)
Don’t apologize, expose his true intentions

Former roommate outed him, cut his career short, and offered a half-hearted apology. NTA

Forgiveness is not owed, token apologies are not enough
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/74673e75-0e78-47e1-bf86-42dc76e0bdc3.png)
Former roommate not sorry, scared of backlash for past actions

Commenter suggests nuclear revenge for army roommate betrayal

Former roommate betrayed him for personal gain, NTA.

Revenge is sweet, but is it worth stooping to his level?

Respectful disagreement on judgment of NTA vs NAH in outing situation
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/97dfb3af-96ae-492f-99ba-e44aec2baad4.png)
Forgiveness is a personal choice. Former roommate’s change commendable. ✌

Supportive comment receives no replies, but deserves recognition

Supportive comment acknowledges the struggle of coming out in the army

Former army man forgives former roommate after being outed

Betrayed by a former roommate, but not by the judgement. NTA

Forgiveness is a choice, not an obligation ✌️

Outing someone for personal gain is never okay
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/3508a9ed-bed8-4f2e-98d7-75062da5e355.png)
Commenter struggles with guilt over exposing former roommate to media.

Forgiveness is a gift to yourself

Empathetic reply offers therapy advice for coping with past trauma

Commenter defends the outed man and shares an interesting observation

Forgiveness is personal and not forced. No judgement here

Forgiveness without friendship, toxicity in blocking. NTA

A sincere apology doesn’t erase the damage caused. NTA

Former roommate’s insincere apology earns him NTA judgement

Opposing views on the man’s bravery

Forgiveness is for yourself, not just for others. NTA

No apologies needed , stand your ground and move on.

Forgiveness is a choice, not an obligation ✌️

Suggesting to out former roommate for false credit on gay rights.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell – European’s Perspective

Unexpected twist in NTA comment sparks curiosity

Former army man forgives former roommate after being outed

Forgiveness is not mandatory. It’s okay to move on.

Forgiveness is hard, but necessary for your own peace. ✌

Confronting a former roommate after being outed in the army

NTA stands firm against self-serving former roommate
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/81886bc9-aa36-495f-8b29-ddd208415709.png)
Supportive Navy veteran regrets commenter’s mistreatment in the Army

Forgive him for yourself, not for him
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/e3e2956e-3ffa-465f-9cea-ae7621dcb167.png)
Last Updated on May 4, 2023 by Diply Social Team