There are times in our lives where we go through bouts of tiny, inconsequential bad luck . Things just don’t go our way, but not in a heartbreaking or tragic way. We miss our bus, we forget our wallet at home, things like that.
To relieve yourself of any small mishaps you may be facing, here’s a list of others going through the same thing, these hilarious people who took one for the team.
“Guess I’ll be living unhealthy.”
The comments were filled with people guessing where this person lived, but my favorite guess had to be inside a Cheesecake Factory.
Actually, the second we start recognizing restaurant chains as countries, we might have some questionable legal matters on our hands.
“I work on the fourth floor…”
I live on the fourth floor of my building, if this happened to me, I’d just stay inside. Sorry to my job and all my errands, no way will I be bullied into taking the stairs when there’s an elevator here.
“Toddler learned how to use the microwave.”
![Image credit: Reddit | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/HsGoKvk9ZMWV4vaGdbV8.png)
Gotta admit the inclusion of your child’s shoe here is kind of ominous. Like whatever it was he did to the controller, you proceeded to do to him, and this is all that remains. Surely there are better ways to punish children, no?
“Someone had a kid on Halloween and named them Lucifer.”
This is actually kind of great. Lucifer’s parents are probably cool as hell, which means he’ll hopefully also grow up cool as hell. Or he’ll become a literal demon child and really live up to his name. Only time will tell!
“This says a lot about society.”
While this isn’t technically false, I’d rather do this cycle than be without my car. Do you know what it’s like to be the only one among any of your friends who can drive? Without me, the entire network falls apart.
“[Suspicious] dog does not trust autumn.”
He doesn’t trust a dang thing out here. The leaves are not only a different color now, but they’re on the ground! Not in the trees! It’s colder, too, he can feel the breeze in his fur and he does not like it.
“Tried to save a few trees and bought a silicone ‘cotton swab’. Guess who’s in urgent care because the other end is stuck in his ear?”
Yes, yes, no one is technically supposed to put cotton swabs in their ears, we all know this by now, but it’s such a primal desire, how are we meant to resist? Even the person who took this photo said they were probably going to fix the swab and keep doing it anyway!
“Happy Friday everyone. I brought salsa.”
I know a Costco run when I see one, which makes this all the more tragic because you just know it was a big jar of salsa. Today we mourn the loss of a fallen condiment, lost in a vicious parking lot battle. May it rest in peace.
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“We were hiking and my sister said ‘there’s a monster in the shadows.'”
I have to hand it to the sister. She saw an opportunity and took it. And to some, the idea that someone left their garbage in between some rocks might be as scary as an actual monster, so it works out really well!
“Baking some Ninja Bread men for Christmas this year!”
Sure, the pun is great and all, but I’m more focused on where this person got those cookie cutters. They make me want to bust out my baking sheet this holiday season, even if my gingerbread won’t turn out nearly as good as this.
“My new plates came in! Honesty is the best policy!”
Who needs dating apps when you can roll around town with this on your car? Anyone willing to pursue would know exactly what they’re in for, it’d be a great way to start off a new relationship on the right foot!
“[Fell] asleep while heating up some mac n [cheese].”
This dish has gone past the point where it can still be called mac or cheese. That’s asphalt. Heat that back up and you could seal a crack in a parking lot.
How did you manage to stay asleep while this happened? No fire alarm? The scent of molten lava didn’t wake you up?
“May the ancient question finally be answered…”
I’m dying to know. Did the owl tell this person how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Do we finally have the answer, after all these years? Or did this person get their hand attacked by this bird of prey?
“Clever signage.”
I’m not really much of a beer drinker, but even I have to admit that this is pretty clever advertising. I’m pretty sure there would be riots in the street if there was an actual beer shortage, though. At least this is just a joke.
“Found this in the washing machine in my building.”
Dang, washing machines are getting stronger. They spent decades just eating socks, they’re craving more, they’re going for bigger hauls. They aim to cause chaos and distress, tired of a lifetime of human servitude. This is their rebellion! Make sure to check your pockets.
“So I bought some Minecraft decorations for my 5yo’s birthday and found this gem.”
I know they probably didn’t, but I kind of wish this parent left this button as part of the party decor. The kids probably can’t read it anyway, and I bet the parents who’d have to stick around for the party would get a kick out of it.
“First they took your daylight, next they’ll take your freedom.”
That last part is a sentiment I can get behind. Do we really need daylight saving time? Can we just pick one and stick to it?
I’d trade it being darker in the mornings for more light at night, I simply do not vibe with the ‘getting dark before dinner’ world we live in now.
“At local burger king that closed recently.”
One Reddit user, Cocky0, comments, “The sequel to Gone Girl doesn’t quite live up to the original.”
It must’ve sucked for the people who worked at that location, but at least they got to go out with a bang.
“One of these things is not like the others…”
I’m definitely hoping for a follow up to this picture where someone grabs the pepper packet and dumps it in their morning coffee. It would’ve been funnier with salt, but if we’re lucky, the poor fool who picks it won’t notice until it’s too late.
“Sign tonight at Waffle House in Blue Ridge Ga.”
Well…at least they’re honest? Though, when it comes to Waffle House, I feel like most customers wouldn’t be expecting a five-star meal regardless. I also can’t say I’ve ever seen anyone near, let alone inside a Waffle House before nine o’clock anyway.
“Nothing better to start your morning than dropping a full jar of glitter.”
That’s it for your house. It’s already spread, infecting every corner. You will be finding glitter for years, decades, your mind decaying as you realize you’ll never be free from it. Watch yourself around glitter, folks. You don’t want this to become you.
“Times have been hard for Mario also.”
Man, the economy in the Mushroom Kingdom must’ve taken a turn for the worse. As funny as this is though, I’m pretty sure I can never play a Super Mario game again. There are some things that you just can’t unsee, and this is for sure one of them.
“One way of showing you’re definitely not struggling through the hangover.”
Kids may not have hangovers, but they do have sugar crashes, which are basically the same thing. And if this kid is anything like me when I was around that age, they probably have had their fair share of sugar hangovers.
“What’s left of the chopping board I melted after preheating the oven. I’m tipsy so this is funny for now…”
If you clean it up while you’re still tipsy, it’ll never have the chance to not be funny! While you wait for it to cool down enough to clean, just keep drinking in the mean time, surely there’s no way this can get any worse, right?
“Someone was told that a costume could be worn.”
What would make this even better is if this wasn’t a military meeting, but a costume party where everyone was supposed to be dressed up in camo and the shark just didn’t get the memo. The fact that no one is paying that guy any mind is pretty priceless, though.
“I made coffee while I was still half-asleep.”
This scenario has to be some sort of right of passage. Either this, or forgetting to put a mug down at all, it’s happened to almost everyone I know, including myself. The only ones exempt are those who don’t drink coffee. They don’t know this type of pain.
“Someone drove through the Drive-Through order radio at our local McDonalds.”
I guess the instructions of ‘drive through’ just aren’t clear enough for some people. Your car is not meant to make contact with any fixture or building in the drive-thru process, there’s no driving into anything either.
“My husband took this picture of me this morning while I was trying to clean my glasses.”
That’s the face os someone who knows they’re doing something funny, but don’t know what it is, only subjected to whoever’s with them laughing and taking a photo. Thankfully, he shared the mystery with you, but not everyone would be so kind.
“Glass pitcher broke clean while trying to pour some tea…”
Yes, this sucks, but this could have been so much worse, too. That’s a beautiful break, and you can still pour out the contents! There’s zero mess involved and no risk of cutting your feet on shards of glass. It’s a loss, but also a win!
“My car is on the other side of this group of assholes. Send help.”
The only way to best a group of geese is to become more wild and chaotic than them. Thrash around wildly and run full force towards them, it should give them a scare and buy you enough time to dash through.
