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Wife Puts Her Foot Down: ‘We Can’t Care for Your Grandma Like a 3rd Baby!’

by Diply Social Team
1 year ago
in Family
Reading Time: 15 mins read
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Picture this: you’re juggling a full-time job, two young kids, and a husband. Life is already chaotic, but then your husband’s grandma needs constant care after a serious surgery. You try to help, but it’s taking a toll on your family. You’re at your wit’s end, and you finally snap, telling your husband that you can’t care for his grandma like she’s your third baby. Are you in the wrong? Let’s dive into this story and find out…

Grandma’s Health Complications

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Family Dynamics ‍♀️

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Rehab Facility Resistance

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Grandma’s Reliance

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Sleepless Nights

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Not Alone, But Still Demanding

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Drama Intensifies

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Setting Boundaries ⛔

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Hospital Visits Continue

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Demanding Husband’s Presence

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Two Babies Already

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Refusing Help

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Taking a Day Off

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Making a Plan

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Two Options ✌️

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Grandma: The Third Baby?

Our protagonist is struggling with the burden of caring for her husband’s grandma, who’s had multiple health complications and refuses to accept professional help. With two young kids and full-time jobs, our couple is stretched thin. The grandma’s constant calls and demands have left them sleep-deprived and frustrated. Finally, our protagonist tells her husband that they can’t care for his grandma like she’s their third baby. After a much-needed day off, they come up with a plan to hire someone or send her to a rehab facility. Let’s see what the internet thinks of this situation…

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Focus on getting more support, not complaining about husband’s grandma. NAH

Image credit: AndSoItGoes24 | AndSoItGoes24
AndSoItGoes24 | AndSoItGoes24

Choosing professional care for grandma is responsible and safe. NTA

Image credit: Left-Quality4455 | Left-Quality4455
Left-Quality4455 | Left-Quality4455

Supportive comment, feeling guilty for not caring for grandma.

Image credit: Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970
Medical-Society-9970 | Medical-Society-9970

Caring for elderly relatives is tough. Seek professional help.

Image credit: Flashy-Experience-25 | Flashy-Experience-25
Flashy-Experience-25 | Flashy-Experience-25

Prioritizing grandma over family? NTA sets husband straight

Image credit: aitagirlfriendanddog | aitagirlfriendanddog
aitagirlfriendanddog | aitagirlfriendanddog

Grandma needs 24hr care, assisted living may be best option.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Curious about the location and circumstances of the situation

Image credit: Otherwise-Shallot-51 | Otherwise-Shallot-51
Otherwise-Shallot-51 | Otherwise-Shallot-51

Spouse’s priorities need realignment for the sake of the family

Image credit: Equal-Brilliant2640 | Equal-Brilliant2640
Equal-Brilliant2640 | Equal-Brilliant2640

Navigating aging parents is tough, but NAH in this case

Image credit: squeakylittlecat | squeakylittlecat
squeakylittlecat | squeakylittlecat

Suggests alternatives for caring for grandma, urges a serious talk

Image credit: Complex_Palpitation2 | Complex_Palpitation2
Complex_Palpitation2 | Complex_Palpitation2

Husband’s grandmother is not his responsibility ‍♂️

Image credit: BodyBy711 | BodyBy711
BodyBy711 | BodyBy711

Parent agrees that being a caretaker for 2 kids is tough

Image credit: Just_here2020 | Just_here2020
Just_here2020 | Just_here2020

User shares personal experience and questions grandma’s decision-making abilities.

Image credit: River-Crossing-2967 | River-Crossing-2967
River-Crossing-2967 | River-Crossing-2967

Compassionate comment offers support and suggests rational communication.

Image credit: EntildaDesigns | EntildaDesigns
EntildaDesigns | EntildaDesigns

Grandma needs professional care, husband needs to prioritize family. NTA

Image credit: Laid-Back-Beach | Laid-Back-Beach
Laid-Back-Beach | Laid-Back-Beach

Enabling grandma won’t help, tell doctors she needs rehab

Image credit: Ok-Extreme-3915 | Ok-Extreme-3915
Ok-Extreme-3915 | Ok-Extreme-3915

NTA suggests a tough strategy to deal with demanding grandma.

Image credit: ChaoticCapricorn | ChaoticCapricorn
ChaoticCapricorn | ChaoticCapricorn

Navigating the complexities of elder care with empathy

Image credit: No_Conflict3188 | No_Conflict3188
No_Conflict3188 | No_Conflict3188

Suggestions for handling grandma’s nighttime needs without burdening family.

Image credit: Key_Plastic_3372 | Key_Plastic_3372
Key_Plastic_3372 | Key_Plastic_3372

Balancing caregiving and parenting is tough. Seek professional help. ‍

Image credit: Accomplished-Pen8889 | Accomplished-Pen8889
Accomplished-Pen8889 | Accomplished-Pen8889

Getting adult protective services involved may be necessary.

Image credit: kam49ers4ever | kam49ers4ever
kam49ers4ever | kam49ers4ever

Be mindful of mental changes in elderly patients after surgery.

Image credit: Oh-its-Tuesday | Oh-its-Tuesday
Oh-its-Tuesday | Oh-its-Tuesday

NTA suggests grandma should hire a health aide.

Image credit: Suchafatfatcat | Suchafatfatcat
Suchafatfatcat | Suchafatfatcat

Setting boundaries is hard but necessary for caregiver burnout prevention.

Image credit: Wise_Improvement_284 | Wise_Improvement_284
Wise_Improvement_284 | Wise_Improvement_284

NTA commenter suggests blocking narcissistic MIL’s number for husband’s sanity.

Image credit: happyasaclamtoo | happyasaclamtoo
happyasaclamtoo | happyasaclamtoo

A cautionary tale of regret: prioritize empathy over frustration

Image credit: Responsible_Duck2771 | Responsible_Duck2771
Responsible_Duck2771 | Responsible_Duck2771

Caring for elderly relatives can be tough, but sometimes necessary.

Image credit: herbz_21 | herbz_21
herbz_21 | herbz_21

No one’s the AH – family needs to face reality

Image credit: history_buff_9971 | history_buff_9971
history_buff_9971 | history_buff_9971

Compassionate comment recognizes the situation’s difficulties for all involved.

Image credit: Tomboyish717 | Tomboyish717
Tomboyish717 | Tomboyish717

Caring for grandma is not easy, ask for a social worker.

Image credit: RogueAxiom | RogueAxiom
RogueAxiom | RogueAxiom

NTA comment suggests grandma may be seeking attention or given up

Image credit: Internal-Test-8015 | Internal-Test-8015
Internal-Test-8015 | Internal-Test-8015

Firm boundaries and clear expectations needed for caring for grandma.

Image credit: Schrams2015 | Schrams2015
Schrams2015 | Schrams2015

Spouse prioritizes family over grandma. NTA

Image credit: Bulky_Bookkeeper8556 | Bulky_Bookkeeper8556
Bulky_Bookkeeper8556 | Bulky_Bookkeeper8556

A plea for compassion towards the elderly in our society

Image credit: lame-lloyd | lame-lloyd
lame-lloyd | lame-lloyd

Caring for elderly relatives can be challenging and emotionally draining

Image credit: Sad-Page-2460 | Sad-Page-2460
Sad-Page-2460 | Sad-Page-2460

Husband’s honorable actions are affecting his own family negatively.

Image credit: PatriotUSA84 | PatriotUSA84
PatriotUSA84 | PatriotUSA84

Setting boundaries and saying no to enable alcoholic MIL.

Image credit: moss1966 | moss1966
moss1966 | moss1966

Empathetic response to a difficult family situation. ❤️

Image credit: dehydratedrain | dehydratedrain
dehydratedrain | dehydratedrain

Advice for caring for elderly relatives: find a night nurse ☺

Image credit: muclover | muclover
muclover | muclover

Sensible suggestion for grandma’s care and warning about rehab facilities.

Image credit: SufficientComedian6 | SufficientComedian6
SufficientComedian6 | SufficientComedian6

NTA. Caregiving boundaries are important and medical advice essential.

Image credit: Neo_Demiurge | Neo_Demiurge
Neo_Demiurge | Neo_Demiurge

Suggests medication for scared grandma, NTA prioritize own family.

Image credit: liquidsky72 | liquidsky72
liquidsky72 | liquidsky72

Grandma needs professional care, not as a 3rd baby.

Image credit: Spinnerofyarn | Spinnerofyarn
Spinnerofyarn | Spinnerofyarn

Suggesting in-home nursing for grandma, praises family’s compassion

Image credit: Zozbot02 | Zozbot02
Zozbot02 | Zozbot02

Hospital social worker can help find care facility for Grandma. NTA.

Image credit: teresajs | teresajs
teresajs | teresajs

Dealing with delirium requires patience and professional care.

Image credit: cekay3 | cekay3
cekay3 | cekay3

Recognizing early symptoms of dementia and the need for professional care.

Image credit: Huntingcat | Huntingcat
Huntingcat | Huntingcat

Insightful comment on caring for elderly family members.

Image credit: NoDaisy | NoDaisy
NoDaisy | NoDaisy

Advice on carer fatigue and finding support for caregivers!

Image credit: FluffAndTumble91919 | FluffAndTumble91919
FluffAndTumble91919 | FluffAndTumble91919

Elder abuse fears may be driving grandmother’s request for help

Image credit: Such-Awareness-2960 | Such-Awareness-2960
Such-Awareness-2960 | Such-Awareness-2960

Experienced nurse advises husband’s grandmother needs professional care

Image credit: Grump_NP | Grump_NP
Grump_NP | Grump_NP

Balancing priorities and emotions while caring for grandma.

Image credit: Valiantrabbit49 | Valiantrabbit49
Valiantrabbit49 | Valiantrabbit49

Tough love! Someone had to say it.

Image credit: Main-Most3243 | Main-Most3243
Main-Most3243 | Main-Most3243

Senior caregiver suggests options for caring for grandma, slams selfish son.

Image credit: Technical-Habit-5114 | Technical-Habit-5114
Technical-Habit-5114 | Technical-Habit-5114

Caring for elderly is tough, but don’t cast them aside

Image credit: SnooDonuts5660 | SnooDonuts5660
SnooDonuts5660 | SnooDonuts5660

NTA. Caregiving for grandma is not your responsibility.

Image credit: genescheesesthatplz | genescheesesthatplz
genescheesesthatplz | genescheesesthatplz

Grandma needs a nursing facility, not a 3rd baby. NTA

Image credit: mbw70 | mbw70
mbw70 | mbw70

Empathize with husband’s grandmother but also understand wife’s frustration.

Image credit: Songbir8 | Songbir8
Songbir8 | Songbir8

The grandma’s fear of loneliness may be driving her decisions.

Image credit: GoAhead_BakeACake | GoAhead_BakeACake
GoAhead_BakeACake | GoAhead_BakeACake

The heartbreaking experience of watching a loved one succumb to infection

Image credit: Firm-Nefariousness80 | Firm-Nefariousness80
Firm-Nefariousness80 | Firm-Nefariousness80

Husband needs to set boundaries for grandma’s care.

Image credit: cornerlane | cornerlane
cornerlane | cornerlane

Setting boundaries with in-laws – a delicate balance

Image credit: justalittlerude | justalittlerude
justalittlerude | justalittlerude

UTI can cause delusions. Rehab place is best for her.

Image credit: Jazstar | Jazstar
Jazstar | Jazstar

Balancing care for a grandma and children can be overwhelming

Image credit: crystalsevens | crystalsevens
crystalsevens | crystalsevens

Suggestions for nursing homes and medications to help grandma.

Image credit: Claque-2 | Claque-2
Claque-2 | Claque-2

NTA and words of caution about bone infections. Say no to being a caregiver.

Image credit: Top-Cut-369 | Top-Cut-369
Top-Cut-369 | Top-Cut-369

Family Eldercare can help with grandma and the neglect is selfish

Image credit: Ok-Molasses3795 | Ok-Molasses3795
Ok-Molasses3795 | Ok-Molasses3795

Having the hard talk with elderly loved ones is tough. NTA.

Image credit: AmateurExpert__ | AmateurExpert__
AmateurExpert__ | AmateurExpert__

Former nurse advises on unsafe home environment and suggests facility care.

Image credit: Whose_my_daddy | Whose_my_daddy
Whose_my_daddy | Whose_my_daddy

Tips for dealing with grandma’s anxiety and finding proper care

Image credit: StartTheDayBetter | StartTheDayBetter
StartTheDayBetter | StartTheDayBetter

Elderly care options discussed in compassionate NTA comment.

Image credit: StopNegative5433 | StopNegative5433
StopNegative5433 | StopNegative5433

19yo granddaughter should help care for her grandma. NTA.

Image credit: DAB0502 | DAB0502
DAB0502 | DAB0502

Taking care of elderly relatives can be challenging and risky.

Image credit: GemueseBeerchen | GemueseBeerchen
GemueseBeerchen | GemueseBeerchen

Setting boundaries is not selfish, it’s necessary for self-care.

Image credit: Llorienna | Llorienna
Llorienna | Llorienna

Heartwarming comment about good husband. Blessings and gratitude ♥

Image credit: Comfortable-Brick168 | Comfortable-Brick168
Comfortable-Brick168 | Comfortable-Brick168

Stay out of the mess. Focus on you and your kids.

Image credit: Holiday_Trainer_2657 | Holiday_Trainer_2657
Holiday_Trainer_2657 | Holiday_Trainer_2657

Be careful what ultimatums you give, it may backfire. ⚠️

Image credit: Unlikely-Distance-41 | Unlikely-Distance-41
Unlikely-Distance-41 | Unlikely-Distance-41

Caretakers are not superhuman, NAH. A rehab facility is best.

Image credit: spinni81 | spinni81
spinni81 | spinni81

Red flags in demanding behavior could be signs of illness

Image credit: Ol_Hickory_Ham_Mike_ | Ol_Hickory_Ham_Mike_
Ol_Hickory_Ham_Mike_ | Ol_Hickory_Ham_Mike_

Grandma needs a dedicated home care aide, family needs rest.

Image credit: Lizard_people8462 | Lizard_people8462
Lizard_people8462 | Lizard_people8462
Tags: Family

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