Marriage is hard enough on its own, but when you throw children into the mix — it can feel almost impossible. Like it or not, more than 50% of marriages with children end in divorce .
It’s an ugly topic but one that is deserving of exploration, especially if we ever hope to fix the problem. Have a look below and take a look as these brave parents explain how their own children ruined their marriage .
Having kids can make you realize the lack of love in your life.
An anonymous Whisper user said that she thought she had true love with her husband until her kids came into the picture. That’s what made her realize what true love is and that she didn’t have that for her husband.
Being a dad means more than just cashing a cheque.
This Whisper user said that prior to having kids, her husband used to talk about what a great dad he’d be. Now that they’re here, all he’s good for is to pay the bills — but contributes nothing to the actual childrearing .
Never say never when it comes to marriage and children.
This Whisper user used to think that there was nothing on earth that could ever come between him and his wife. But then they had kids and somehow, almost overnight, everything changed for the worse .
Kids can cause you to become unhinged.
“Having a kid turned my ex wife[sic] from a normal person into a chemically unbalanced person, which led her to make bad decisions that ultimately ruined the marriage . It started out as post-partum depression and spiraled out into Great Badness.” – Reddit u/continuousBaBa
“A marriage is like a bridge. Kids are like an earthquake. Kids will expose any defects or weaknesses that are present in the marriage.” – Reddit u/_flashgordon
I’ve read and heard a lot of parenting metaphors in my day, but this just might be the best one I’ve ever come across.
A Whisper user from Louisville, Kentucky, was left high and dry by her husband after they had kids.
According to her heartwrenching post, he simply wasn’t able to function anymore. Instead of working on things at home and sticking it out, he abandoned the entire family .
Despite what you might have heard, kids don’t fix marital issues.
An anonymous user from Whisper says that she wishes she never had kids in the first place . She claims they completely ruined her marriage and that she misses her husband dreadfully.
The decision to have children shouldn’t be made haphazardly.
“It’s horrible to say, but I think that having kids has ruined our marriage,” an anonymous Whisper user explained. “We truly didn’t know what we were getting into and now we resent each another .”
Rest assured, you’ll both be entirely different people after kids come along.
A father from Johnstown, NY, talked about how his wife completely changed after they had their first child. Luckily, they’ve decided to get help — but it very nearly destroyed everything.
If you’re not on the same page when it comes to your parenting fundamentals, you’re in for a wild ride.
A Whisper user from Attleboro, MA, slowly grew more and more frustrated over the fact that his wife wasn’t strict enough with the kids . Their parenting approach is the polar opposite and it’s destroyed their relationship.
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What would you do if it was you?
A Whisper user from Deer Lodge, Manitoba was given a horrendous ultimatum by her husband. He confessed that he no longer loved their children and that the only way he’d be willing to stay in the marriage would be if they were put up for adoption .
Is there a ghost in my house?
“My son has a whole host of psychiatric and behavioral problems that has honestly destroyed everything I loved and wanted to have a child for. My marriage isn’t what it was because my son’s never ending[sic] needs has changed us for the worse. We’re ghosts now .” – Reddit u/BallofEnvy
There’s a shadow hanging over me.
A Whisper user from Calgary, Alberta, claims that both she and her husband were so much happier six months ago before the baby came along. Ever since then, an ugliness has crept into their marriage — one which she’s unsure will ever go away.
He who is not busy being born is busy dying.
Redditor TakinArmsNLegs says that there isn’t a single day that goes by wherein he doesn’t think about running away. He claims to love his wife and children but resents the kids for removing all joy from his life .
If you are experiencing postpartum depression, please seek help.
“Sometimes, I feel like the worst thing to happen to our marriage is having a baby. My wife isn’t the same person with postpartum depression and she doesn’t see how much it affects me too.” Whisper/Anonymous