While setting out to attempt the impossible task of defining women in a single word, “patient” is one of the first that comes to mind. A woman can/will/does put up with an awful lot of shit before they hit their breaking point .
But eventually, the levee breaks . The dam is swept away, and a moment of newfound clarity is born. With that in mind, have a look below as these women of Reddit share the moment that inspired them to simply stop giving a damn .
Redefining the term “self-worth.”
“Realising[sic] that my self worth[sic] is not dependent on how happy I have made the people around me. In other words, bar a select number of loved ones, the majority of people’s emotions are not my responsibility.” – Reddit u/senorsondering
You are worthy of love and consideration.
Reddit user scarlettskadi said that she slowly came to realize that she deserves the exact same amount of consideration that she gives to others — that you can still love and support someone without enabling them or bearing the burden of their drama.
The straw that broke the camel’s back.
Redditor broccolicares slowly came to understand that her actions were doing her more harm than good. That, and the realization that the majority of people she was over-extending herself for couldn’t be bothered to jump over a puddle for her.
Always remember the immortal words of Dr. Seuss…
The great Doctor once said that if you’re worried about what other people think of you — stop it. Because those who mind never matter, and those who matter never mind !
People will start respecting your boundaries once you start reinforcing them.
“I’m still working on this, but what helped the most was working on my boundaries, defining them and seeing when I wasn’t holding them to allow people to get their way.” – Reddit u/Mysterious_Owl_2399
It’s a dog-eat-dog world.
Reddit user Candid-Amphibian-726 eventually came to the realization that all human beings on this planet, at their core, are out for themselves. Therefore, it shouldn’t be an issue when she does it too. After all, the lion does not concern itself with the opinions of sheep.
It shouldn’t be this hard.
It took a while, but after enough time Redditor lazynlovinit was finally able to see that the people in her life whom she was putting the most effort into were the ones who inevitably wound up giving her the worst ROI.
Time is the most valuable commodity.
Everything changed for Reddit user abominablebuttplug as soon as she came to truly understand the value of her own time. When she started asking herself the question “Would this person ever do the same for me?” she was shocked at the response.
No one thinks the same way that you do.
Reddit user Balooski used to constantly obsess over what they thought other people might be thinking at all times. In order for her to break the cycle, she first learned to stop presuming that everyone thought the same way she did.
People-pleasing can be toxic.
“I kept being criticised[sic] when pleasing others, so I had enough and realised[sic] I’d better be criticised while doing what I want. Eventually[sic] I forgot I was criticized and realised I don’t give a [expletive] anymore.” – Reddit u/careless298
I’m listening.
Take it from Redditor tryingtobeapersonnow, sometimes what helps the most is simply having someone to share with and talk to. Once they were able to open up in a place that was free from judgment, they were finally able to stop giving a damn about everyone else.
Learn to spot the behavior.
Reddit user Supercrushhh says that it’s all about learning how to recognize your own behavior patterns. It took a lot of time, but once she could recognize her response mechanisms as they were unfolding, she was then able to begin altering them.
Kids really do change your entire perspective.
The moment that Redditor artipants learned she was pregnant, she decided right then and there that in order to be a role model and advocate for her child, she needed to start putting herself first.
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That’s rock bottom.
Unfortunately, Reddit user Alert-Potato says that she had to hit rock bottom before she was able to admit that there was even a problem, to begin with. As she began picking up the broken p[pieces of her life, she left every last [expletive] she could give lying on the ground.
A fast “no” is better than a slow “maybe.”
“I still overthink a lot; i[sic] roominate[sic]. However[sic] I learned that my energy is precious and it can’t be wasted on trivial things. I also realized my overthinking was trying to solve unsolvable situations or get out of an obvious answer.” – Reddit u/RioBlue93
h/t: Reddit
