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Mommy guilt is real, y’all.
Hilary Duff just spoke about the immense guilt she experienced while pregnant with baby #2.
Things got so bad that the star even once questioned, “How do I reverse this?”
Hilary Duff has always been open about the highs and lows of pregnancy.
When the 32-year-old first gave birth to Banks, the 1-year-old baby girl she had with husband, Matthew Koma, in 2018, she shared how breastfeeding was impacting her mentally.
In a lengthy Instagram post, she explained her decision to give up breastfeeding after six months.
“Last week was my last week nursing Banks (my six month old) I am a working mom of two. My goal was to get my little girl to six months and then decide if I (and her of course) wanted to keep going,” she began.
At the time, she struggled balancing breastfeeding with filming the show, “Younger.”
“Pumping at work sucks. I had zero downtime and am usually pumping in a hair and makeup trailer while four hands work to get me ready for the next scene with lots of other people around,” she said
“Even if I had the luxury to be in my own room, it’s not even considered a ‘break’ because you have to sit upright for the milk to flow into the bottles!”
She went on to share the many other difficulties she experienced, such as pain from the breast pumping machine and finding a place to sterilize bottles while still keeping her milk cold.
Despite these challenges, Hilary wrote that she was determined to breastfeed until Banks was six months old.
Once she reached that milestone, though, she called it quits.
“I know many women are not able to and for that I am sympathetic and very grateful that I could. For six wonderful months. But I needed a break. I was going to break.”
“I was sad and frustrated and feeling like a failure all of the time. When really I’m a [expletive] rock star,” she added.
Yes, you are, Hilary!
Now, the “Lizzie McGuire” star recently shared another struggle of pregnancy: mom guilt.
While speaking to PureWow , she explained the guilt she experienced for having a second child when her first one, 6-year-old Luca, was so young.
Hilary had Luca during her previous marriage to NHL player, Mike Comrie.
“It was just he and I for so long that he was like, ‘Why? Why, Mom? Why would you do this? I really just love the way it is,’ ” Duff recalled to the site.
“And it wasn’t bratty, it was just so sad.”
This immense guilt started soon after learning that she was pregnant.
The star recalled asking herself, “‘How do I reverse this?! It’s too late now.’ It’s such big feelings. When you’re pregnant, everything just feels more magnified.”
But once Banks was born in October 2018, she knew that things between the siblings would be okay.
“He came in after I had her. I was just holding her, and the look on his face was an absolute shock. He just said, ‘That’s my sister!’”
She continued: And he had to sneeze, so he ran out of the room and was like, ‘I’ll be right back.’”
“He let out this huge sneeze in the hallway and said, ‘I had to sneeze and I knew I couldn’t do it in here near her.’”
Aww!
These days, Luca is the best older brother there is.
“It’s the best,” Duff said of their dynamic.
“It’s a chemical reaction between siblings sometimes where he knows he has to protect her.”
“It’s really sweet the way he looks out for her. But also, sometimes I’m like, ‘Hey, I did OK with you. I promise I know what I’m doing.’”
Luca being a super-protective big bro does have its downsides, though, like when he starts to scold Hilary!
“He doesn’t want her to ever fall off the couch … sometimes I’m like, ‘I swear I’m a good mom,’” the newlywed recalled to “People” in November.
“He’s like, ‘Well, you need to watch her,'” she said .
“I’m like, ‘She’s gonna fall down. She’s got to learn not to go near that’ or whatever,” she said.
“I sat him down once and said, ‘Hey, you survived and I was your mom, so I swear she’s going to be okay.’”
Truth!
As long as these kiddos have Hilary as their mom, they will always have safety, comfort, and lots of love <3
