It wasn’t so long ago that talking about the ethics of how you use the internet would only get you odd looks and maybe some derisive laughter from people.
Fifteen years ago, the common, naive belief was that there was a clear line between what happens on the internet and what happens “in real life.”
Of course, years of seeing the effects of bullying and stalking in real time have shown us it doesn’t work that way.
As a result, many of us have come to understand that we need to exercise caution before we post information that’s not necessarily ours to share online.
Still, one case shows that some work needs to be done to iron out the details of these ethics.
In late March, Twitter user @purplegoddess let the world know how attractive she found her dermatologist.
So she tweeted out this photo of him with the caption “MY GOD MY DERMATOLOGIST FINE AS S***!”
At first, responses came from women who were inclined to agree.
Some felt a sudden interest in their skin’s health, while others simply confirmed how fine he is and called him “yummy.”
However, the way she went about expressing her attraction didn’t sit well with other users.
Since he didn’t seem to notice the camera, they saw reason to believe that the dermatologist wasn’t aware that she had taken his photo and intended to spread it online.
For that reason, he couldn’t consent to it and the collective thirst over him suddenly took on some unsettling undertones.
In a way, this person’s photograph was voyeuristic, and completely inappropriate. Not to mention a total breach of respect for a professional doing their job.
To make matters worse, @purplegoddess later tweeted the contents of his business card.
Spreading information that can make someone easier to locate is called “doxing” and users felt it seemed particularly irresponsible to do this because it could make him a target for stalkers.
And again, it was all taking place without his knowledge or consent.
So by the time @purplegoddess celebrated how viral her tweet had become, others were less than amused.
In all likelihood, it was this backlash that led her to delete all the tweets about her dermatologist, as they no longer appear on her page.
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However, the story behind them had spread far enough that the doctor himself caught wind of them.
His name is Imran Aslam and he told Bored Panda “My first reaction was just pure anxiety. I am a very low key individual so when I first heard that I was trending on Twitter I was kind of freaking out, like ‘oh my god what is happening.'”
However, that anxiety started to settle when he saw the favorable responses his picture was getting.
As he said, “I started to find the whole situation pretty funny. The comments on Twitter were hilarious, people were posting all sort of ridiculous things and the picture just kept getting liked. I think it got over 20,000 likes or something. It was crazy.”
Naturally, he also saw the discussion about sexual harassment that unfolded and while he agrees that that’s what happened by definition, he also doesn’t feel victimized.
He went on to say, “As I reflect more on this sentiment I realize the reason for this is undoubtedly because of my ‘male privilege.'”
“By definition, many of the comments on my picture would be considered a form of sexual harassment,” he said.
“I can totally understand how people consider this to be a double standard in light of the #metoo movement. And that if those same comments were made about a woman there would an uproar.”
“I have had the privilege of never once feeling threatened or intimated by a woman in a sexual manner,” he said.
“I have had the privilege of never being catcalled, and I have had the privilege of never experiencing what it’s like to be followed home by a stranger that was a woman.”
Aslam explained how this privilege contributed to the way his situation was interpreted.
“It is because of these liberties that we enjoy as males that I think the sexual harassment discussion may have to be interpreted differently in my situation.”
Overall, it seems like the woman who posted his photo learned her lesson, and Aslam learned a little bit about going viral.
He seems to be taking the situation well, and we’re glad he doesn’t feel as exposed or exploited as he could have. He even shared the photo and screen shots of the story to his instagram page!
h/t: Bored Panda
