Thanks to Comedy Central and The Office , we’re well-acquainted with roasts.
This is when a person of honor (or dishonour, depending on how you look at it) gets savagely roasted by a group of people.
Well, what if that group of people were millions on the internet ? That’s where these 19 posts come in. Thanks to the powers of social media, these folks were roasted to a crisp!
The low-baller
This is what this guy gets for trying to make a joke of the seller! He really thought it would fly for him to respond “$200” after the seller said the lowest he would go is “$700”. He’s sure got jokes.
The kid roast
“I will never forget the day my young son asked, while looking at our wedding photo ‘Mom, who is that pretty lady next to Dad?'” this mom on Twitter. Yikes! Leave it up to our kids to be the most savage roasters.
The positive test
“Quarantine” LOL. She sure will be forced to do some of that when her pregnant stomach starts getting in the way. While she’s doing that, let’s get this guy to take an IQ test. We’re positively sure he’ll test positive for being an idiot.
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The double chins
“My daughter looked at me adoringly and said, ‘Mama, I love you and your chins,'” this poor mom tweeted . If we’re not safe from our own kids, who are we safe from?!
This guy’s a pain
There are three bad scenarios here. First, being on your period sucks. No two ways about it. Second, rolling your ankle in that way is the worst and causes your life to flash before your eyes. Three, this guy exists. That’s a major problem.
The split personality
“Kid in my son’s class explained to me that she was sure he has two moms because he has ‘the pretty mom and the other mom.’ She described each to me in some detail. Reader, both are me,” this mom tweeted
The head injury
This guy must’ve been dropped on his head one too many times as a kid. It doesn’t make you a snowflake to wear a helmet. It makes you safe and helps prevent parents from raising kids like them.
The drink
This Twitter user set up so many jokes and roasts when he tweeted , “Can anyone recommend a good wine that pairs well with a teenager’s [expletive] attitude?” Tequila, DEFINITELY Tequila.
This makes us unhappy
That would be a good start! Although, in her defense, there is the movie, The Pursuit of Happyness . Even if this girl was right, though, we’re still questioning what she really means.
The full moon
If you truly want to get roasted, go after major corporations online. That’s what Kaela, or shall we say, Kayla, went through after she dared to make fun of MoonPie by writing, “They should call you MoonBye because nobody likes you.”
The mom roast
Isn’t it the best when parents roast their teens? This mom did so in the best way when she tweeted , “My teen is starving. The only thing he’s ate today is a bowl of cereal, 5 sandwiches, 12 granola bars, a rotisserie chicken…”
The genealogist
They’ve missed the point, clearly. It’s so far gone, in fact, that it’s probably traveled back through time to this person’s ancestors. Maybe it could even prevent the ancestors from making this person?
The hat
Remember the giant hat Pharrell Williams wore to the 2014 Grammy Awards? Well, Arby’s didn’t miss an opportunity to roast the artist’s style choice by tweeting, “can we have our hat back?”
This new concept
Maybe this is why libraries are dying? People have no idea that the brilliant concept of borrowing books exist. To be fair, we’re still missing Scholastic Book Fairs. But if this library could lend out a brain to this person, that would be great!
The text
One man on Twitter was upset at telecommunications provider O2 when a poor girl didn’t respond to the 246 texts he sent her. Take a hint, dude! The company offered some sage advice for better odds: “Maybe next time try sending 1 text to 246 different girls.”
The radio
The reception on this person’s brain is clearly a little fuzzy. We need to tune it to a channel where they can understand how FM radio exists. Or, live performances on TV, for that matter
The companies at war
There’s nothing like two companies at war with each other on Twitter. The popcorn came out for this fight between Old Spice and Taco Bell when Old Spice tried to roast Taco Bell’s fire sauce. In the end, the roastée became the roasted.
The ID
Right?! I mean, the government is the one who took our photo in the first place and then mailed it to us. This paranoia of the government is getting out of hand.
The boy or girl
Kids will say the darndest things! This was more than proven when this preschool teacher tweeted , “I have short hair. I was wearing a skirt. A little girl in my daughter’s preschool class asked if I was a boy or a girl.”
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