Nothing is more integral to a Netflix binge than the snacks.
No, I’m not talking about carrot sticks and hummus (miss me with that healthy stuff, thanks). I mean the kind of food that tastes great going in and makes you feel like dying later.
But do we ever truly regret these foods when we’re lying on the couch, our blood sugar at an all-time high?
Never.
1. This is the kind of snack made for the privacy of one’s home.
And ideally eaten during a shameful 10-hour Netflix binge.
I’d probably even destroy the packaging afterward just so the folks who handle the garbage truck didn’t think I was a monster who feeds exclusively on sugar.
2. Let’s not pretend we’re too good for these.
In the hyperbolic world of food labels, “loaded” is a synonym for “indulgent.”
And indulgence goes hand-in-hand with sitting on your couch for hours on end.
3. Introducing my childhood, in bite form.
These cinnamon sugar-dusted bites are ready in just 30 seconds…
…which is perfect, because that’s more than enough time to cook them during the Stranger Things title sequence.
4. Netflix and chill with Twinkies ice cream.
Any “limited edition” junk food is usually that way for a reason.
It’s like Hostess saying, “Hey, this is crazy and kind of gross, but you’ll probably try it once.”
And yes, I would.
5. Bake your very own Cinnabon at home.
There’s no use wasting precious couch-sitting energy on cooking unless it’s for a Cinnabon.
Few things are worth getting off your couch for, but this is one of them.
6. You know what this sugar is missing? More sugar.
If you can’t decide between candy or chocolate, a snack like Lunchables Dirt Cake is your solution.
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These things are like Dunk-a-Roos 2.0, and their sugar content will likely keep you awake through both seasons of Master of None .
7. You’re an adult. You can make your own decisions.
And if orange creamsicle milk is one of them, so be it.
You can’t enjoy a Netflix binge if you’re preoccupied with questions like, “How’d they get it so orange?” or “Can my arteries handle 40 grams of sugar?”
8. Not a fan of candy corn? How ’bout now?
Still no?
Oh. OK, then.
Despite the Halloween theme here, a large bag of candy is always a smart choice when you’re binge-watching with a friend.
Or alone — I’m not judging.
9. We didn’t ask for this, but we aren’t complaining, either.
Any item that makes it socially acceptable to eat cookie dough with a spoon is fine by me.
Oreo cookie dough is just a bonus.
10. How do we feel about this gum?
I’m on the fence, but it might be perfect for that 15-minute period between “I’m so full” and “I could go for another cookie.”
11. Go on. We won’t judge you.
Popcorn is a must-have for any Netflix movie marathon.
So if you like carmel popcorn, what makes you think you won’t like this?
Think about it.
12. Speaking of sweetening up a salty snack…
If you’re a fan of Cheetos Puffs, then you might enjoy their cinnamon sugar version.
But if you prefer Cheetos Crunchy, you can politely ignore this message.
13. Molten lava cakes don’t have to be fancy-shmancy.
They can be for lowkey occasions, too, like watching all six hours of Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life in your pajamas.
After you get over the fact they’re called Ding Dongs, of course.
14. Kick your pizza order up a notch.
Whether it’s bacon-wrapped crust, hot dog-stuffed crust, or bacon-wrapped hot dog-stuffed crust, a Netflix binge is one of the few times you have reason to bedazzle your pizza crust.
You must be well-fed if you’re going to continue watching.
15. Now this…this we asked for.
Sadly, this isn’t an actual Oreo product.
Clearly, Nabisco’s marketing team is ignoring their customer’s needs.
However, you can still make these on your own by tossing out the cookie parts from Double Stuf Oreos.
16. Chocolate chip cookie dough: the ultimate binge-watching snack.
I’ve been doing just fine squeezing the standard tube into my mouth, but this product seems like a modern take on a binge-watching classic.
And because of that, it’s our top pick.
TAG a friend who you binge-watch Netflix with!
