The world can be an unsettling place at times, especially for women. Over the last few years, there have been amazing strides taken towards spreading awareness of the persecutions that women in all industries have had to silently suffer from men in positions of power. And, while the world seems to be slowly moving in the right direction in terms of gender equality, there are still women out there being harassed by men on a daily basis.
One person took to Reddit to find out what sort of things that women on Reddit have had to endure in the past, by asking, “Women of Reddit, what’s the creepiest thing a man has said to you?”
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Below are some of the most unsettling stories that people had to share.
The Ginger Question
“When you’re a woman with red hair, some guys (including total strangers) seem to think it’s perfectly acceptable to ask you some version of ‘Does the carpet match the drapes?’ Guys, don’t do that. It creeps us out.” — Embeast
How someone could ever think that it would be okay to be so vulgar to a stranger, or someone they know, is beyond me.
“You’re Going To Have Sex With Me”
“‘You’re going to have sex with me. I already opened the condom and I’m not going to waste this’ guy tried raping me on the sidewalk down the street from my house when I was 15. His family was at my house for a party and he asked me to help him grab more beer from his car.
“So I laughed and told him if he touched me he would be dead and sprinted home. Before anyone asks, I didn’t say anything for a while to anyone because I didn’t want to cause a scene. I told my dad eventually and the guys family claimed I was a slut who was probably making it up.” — jessthemessb
She went on to write that he told her that no one would believe her if she told anyone and that ultimately even her own father didn’t believe her.
Nazi Sympathiser
“On our first (and only) date he told me he understood why people followed Hitler and that he never finished video games because he got so much joy out of watching/making the characters die over and over. He also wouldn’t stop talking about his parents’ drug and alcohol problems. It was 2 months ago and my first real date ever makes me wary about going on any more.” — okaykittycat
Apparently they had met on Tinder and only chatted for a short while before meeting up. People, before meeting Tinder dates, make sure they’re not Nazi sympathizers, that’s day one stuff!
Assaulting A Minor
“When I was 14, I dropped my phone in the toilet. My grandpa took me to Verizon to see if I could get a replacement. While I was looking at cellphones, this older man came up to me (I’m a lady) and started chatting with me. Being my 14-year-old self I talked with him for a bit and went on my way.
“I moved to another part of the store and he came back over and started saying things like ‘I want to take you back to my van…I like your body.’ I became visibly upset and went up to the counter to getaway. The guy followed me and came up behind me and put his arms around me and grabbed onto my wrist and tried to pull me away, and then my Grampa walked up and calmly said ‘get away from my granddaughter, you need to leave right now.'” — slyfox4
Thank goodness that their grandfather was there to help, it’s a miracle he didn’t knock him out there and then.
Kidnapping
“My friend, ‘Amelia,’ works as a loan officer for a credit union and […] has a regular who always tried to flirt with her. He was 40-something and never wanted anyone to help him but my friend. Amelia thought it was harmless until last summer.
“There was a story on the news about a teenage girl who got kidnapped and put into the back of a car’s trunk around Amelia’s workplace. Everyone was on high alert. The day after the kidnapping, Amelia’s customer came in and did his usual routine of asking her out for dinner, told her to check his account for fraud, etc. In the middle of their convo, he just stopped talking and started checking Amelia out. So, of course, she asked him what was wrong and he responded back: ‘Nothing darling. Just wondering if you would fit in the back of my trunk.'” — Poppieesh
They posted an update writing that the management had to sit down with the customer and explain why he was out of order. Apparently, he responded by saying that he only did it as she wouldn’t say yes to going out with him.
Workplace Abuse
“‘I can’t wait for you to get back there so we can just [touch] you!’. Said by a creepy old man who works in the department I recently transferred into. I am the only woman in this department and the other men were ashamed he actually said that to me.” — Swell-Fellow
People like this need to be reported to higher-ups and face real-world repercussions for their words, otherwise they will likely continue this pattern of disgusting behavior.
Harassment On The Train
“On the train with one other person in the car. Middle of the afternoon. Train stops and a few people get on. I’m listening to music and trying to psych myself up for dinner service when my earbud is pulled out and I hear ‘can I sit on your lap?’
“I look over and it’s this old ass man waggling his brows at me. I screamed at him and moved to the end of the car, got off at the next stop and walked the rest of the way to work.” — ErinbutnotTHATone
Seedy Neighbour
“When I was 19, a neighbor invited me in for a drink. He handed me a glass of gin and said ‘I call this the panty remover'” — Almost_a_Full_Moon
In this kind of instance, you’re best off just excusing yourself and leaving. Some people will try and claim that this sort of thing is “just a joke”, but it really isn’t.
Inappropriate Comments From Teachers
“A substitute history teacher in 7th grade (I was barely 12) had a reputation for hitting on girls, but I didn’t really believe it until he had me stay after class one day and told me, ‘If you were 5 years older I’d be ALL OVER you.’ and ‘Don’t you know how hot you are?’ and ‘Thank God for girls who develop early,’ while staring at my breasts.” — azemilyann26
Hopefully, this person is no longer teaching. To think it is appropriate to talk to children like that is repugnant in every way!
“You can’t pass us until you hug me”
“Walking to work one morning and there were two giant dudes walking towards me and taking up the whole sidewalk. I knew I was in for something just by how they were walking and the booze cloud around them. one of the guys said ‘you can’t pass us until you hug me.’ I jumped off the sidewalk and decided I would rather be hit by a car rather than picked up and carried off.” — ErinbutnotTHATone
Taking Upskirt Photos
“Guy took an upskirt photo of me at a party and got caught. ‘I’m not deleting it. What’s the big deal, I’m a good guy, I’m not gonna post it on facebook.’
“Yeah, cuz good guys take upskirt photos without permission. Thankfully I had two big male friends with me and they informed him that he could hand the phone over to me so I could delete it, or they could take him outside to discuss the issue first.”
I don’t think you can use the “I’m a good guy” defense after being an abhorrent waste of skin.
The Creepy Blind Date
“Blind date, after the movie he asked ‘does anyone know where you are?’ Noped the hell out of there and made it a point to ALWAYS tell someone where I was when going on a date from that point forward.” — newhappyrainbow
Letting somewhere know where you are and what your plan is for the evening is a good practice to employ when meeting anyone new, it costs nothing to be careful.
“You know, I can’t wait to go to heaven…”
“In a rural southern college town, I missed the last bus and had to take a taxi home from the store. The driver gave me creepy vibes so I told him to drop me off at a church near my house so he wouldn’t know where I lived.
“With a toothless smile, he said, ‘Ohh you’re a good little church girl, are ya?’ He looked at my shopping bags. ‘You know, I can’t wait to go to heaven. You ain’t gonna need all those clothes in heaven.’ I’m glad I didn’t die.” — rainbow-rolls
I think on the extensive list of things that will discount you from getting into heaven, this is on there, and it’s pretty high at that.
The Toxic Boyfriend
“‘I’m your boyfriend I have every right to put my hands wherever I want’ this was after moving his hands away from my a** many times in a public place early into dating and telling him no on the day of, this was said during the argument that lead to me dumping him (best thing I’ve done), another great extract from that argument was him trying to say he loved me while in a few more words calling me a cold-hearted b**ch for not focusing all attention on him. Wasn’t till we broke up did I realize how toxic he had been.” — KateA535
No one has the right to put their hands on your body without your consent. This person’s ex sounds like a textbook manipulator, and the person who wrote this is fortunate that they got away from this relationship. You should never be with someone who controls you through mental practices.
“Daddy likes it too”
“I worked at a movie theater when I was 16. I was working in the box office that day, had a little girl probably around 4 or 5 years old and her father come buy tickets for some kid movie that was playing at the time. The little girl points at my hair (which was colored red at the time) and told her dad she liked my hair. Her dad promptly looks me square in the eyes and with a creepy/flirty smirk says ‘daddy likes it too’. As soon as he walked away I noped right outta there.” — kimmis_black
This is just straight-up creepy, there’s no two ways about it. Also, can people using the word “daddy” in a sexualized context makes me shudder in horror every time?
Messages From The Manager
“Got a text. ‘Hello, lovely lady, I hope you had a wonderful day today’
“I asked who it was. Turns out he was a manager on my floor (call center) and saw me, so he decided to get my number. Nobody on that floor knew my number, so I know that he must’ve gone to my personal file and look through it. It was just creepy, he even knew my car and everything. I told him that if he ever texted again, I’d report him to HR” — DragonSeniorita_009
If this sort of thing ever happens, it is important to report it to HR. People can think that doing so will impact negatively on their job prospects. However, if people aren’t called out for this kind of behavior, then it will never stop.
“We would make beautiful babies”
“A guy I casually dated: ‘We would make beautiful babies’ on a second date and ‘I wish I could trick you into getting pregnant’ on a drunk dial That was the last time we talked.” — Jera420
“Is It Safe For You To Be Here?”
“Sitting in a room full of guys I didn’t know after the bar ‘do you think it’s really safe for you to be here?'” — pussycatsglore
I don’t think anyone would feel safe sitting in a room full of people if one of the people asked them that!
Asking About Their Marriage Status
“‘How married are you?'” — Mirenithil
This is up there in the list of “100 most douchebagy things you can possibly say”. Unless I simply never got the memo about the newly introduced marriage tier system?
Taunting School-kids
“I was ten and walking home from school alone in the middle of the day. An old man with a horrendous dye job stopped me, grabbed me by the shoulder and said ‘Hey there, pretty little girl. Wanna sit on Papa’s lap and make him feel good?’ I ran all the way home and I could hear him laughing behind me. It’s been what, twelve years or so, and I still remember his face, down to the creepy grin.”
While this list can paint the world in the bleakest light possible, there are good people out there. And, over time, hopefully, we will all be able to see these instances as a crude facet of a forgotten past, instead as a tragic reality that most women are forced to endure. We can move forward as a society, and all people standing up as one against this kind of sexist nonsense will hopefully bring that about.