While it’s good to spend time with your partner and take care of them when they need it, it’s also important to take time for yourself. But there are a lot of times when it seems like one person in a relationship doesn’t want their partner to even spend a second away from them. And that’s… troubling.
For one Reddit user, she spends most of her time caring for her disabled husband. But, it got to the point where he wouldn’t even let her hang out with her friends without him. Now, the user (using a throwaway account) is wondering if she’s in the wrong for wanting to exclude him from her girls’ night in. She posted her story to the Am I The Asshole Community and got lots of responses.
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The User Shares Her Story.
From What OP Has Said, It Sounds Like Her Husband Is Dependent On Her.
She shares that her husband is disabled, and uses a wheelchair. She also shares that he’s mostly dependent on her, and they’re together almost constantly. She can’t even go out shopping because she needs to be with him.
OP continues by saying she hadn’t seen her friends in a long time and wanted to have a girls’ night in. But her husband wanted to sit in on it, and she refused. He got angry and accused OP of being selfish. Now, OP is wondering if she really is in the wrong.
Pretty Much Every Commenter Agreed That… She’s Not.
Commenters discuss how the husband is acting pretty toxic. Many were pretty outraged over the fact that OP admitted that her husband hardly lets her have privacy in the bathroom. The fact that he won’t let her have privacy with her friends for a few hours is a huge red flag.
In Fact, Many Worried If OP Is In An Abusive Relationship.
As OP explained in her story, the husband won’t let her go out shopping or see her friends. She’s constantly home with him, and barely even allowed to see her friends. Many users worry that OP is being emotionally manipulated or abused.
Users Were Also Quick To Point Out That The Husband Shouldn’t Need OP As Much As He Claims To.
Though OP doesn’t share the extent of her husband’s disability, it doesn’t seem that he should be so dependent on her that she can’t even shower in peace. Other disabled people and caregivers to disabled people chimed in, stating that most disabled people still go outside and do things for themselves, and caregivers get breaks when they need them.
It seems there are much deeper issues in OP’s relationship than her husband’s disability.
