Every step towards becoming married feels like the biggest one yet, but arguably the biggest step of all is the actual proposal .
Whoever it is doing the proposing wants everything to be perfect, especially the ring, seeing as that ring will symbolize their union for years to come. So, what is there to do when the proposee doesn’t like the ring? That’s what one fretting fiancée asked an advice column, and here are the answers.
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It takes a lot of planning, decision making, and guts to propose to someone.
But the biggest decision of all is the ring choice. It has to be perfect, suiting the taste of your fiancée-to-be, something they’ll be proud to wear for a long time.
What happens, though, when that doesn’t quite pan out? A woman who was recently proposed to asked an advice column for some help after admitting that she ‘absolutely hates’ the ring she was given.
The question she poses is short, but straight to the point.
“How do I tell my fiancé I absolutely hate the engagement ring he bought?”
She’s looking to directly break the news to him, probably in a way that doesn’t destroy their future marriage or hurt his feelings too much. In the initial Facebook post, opinions went flying, and there’s currently over 400 comments debating what she should do. Here are some of the answers people provided.
First were those who thought she shouldn’t say anything.
“You don’t!” exclaimed one commenter, “You act like an adult, and go on about your business. Don’t act like an ungrateful child.”
“You don’t!” echoed another, “He put a lot of thought and love into picking that out. Suck it up! Love it [because] he gave it to you and the meaning behind it.”
In fact, most people were shocked she wanted to tell him at all.
As one user put it, “The man offered the rest of his life to you and you’re worried about a PIECE OF CARBON ON A BAND?! Ungrateful and materialistic.”
“It’s the thought he put into it that counts. Love isn’t based on material things. Sounds like he should get out while he still can,” said another.
Then there were those who sympathized.
Many were shocked at the vitriol in the comments, “[…] people are being awfully [judgy] about this. Clearly you care enough about him and his feelings to want to be able to tell him in a way that tries not to hurt his feelings. There’s nothing wrong with you guys having different tastes, so just try to word it gently like someone else on here said and hopefully he will be understanding.”
“I don’t think this woman should be insulted for hating the ring. We haven’t even seen how ugly it might be. I don’t want to wear something ugly for the rest of my life […],” said one honest response.
Lastly, there were those who had some sneakier ideas regarding how to handle the situation.
“Just make it disappear… Say you took it off to do dishes or do some gardening and now you can’t find it anywhere,” suggested one viewer.
Similar in tactic without needing to hide anything was this suggestion, “Tell him that you love it but prefer a different style because of […] daily tasks and what not.”
Lots of opinions and lots of advice for this fiancée.
Whether or not you agree with her hating the ring this much, hopefully she finds the right path that leaves both her and her future husband satisfied.
How do you think she should tackle this? Let us know in the comments!
