Thanks to the never-ending pandemic, I’ve been given plenty of free time to really polish up my cooking skills, and I’m proud to say that I’m now somewhat just O.K. at it.
If you knew where I started, you’d know just how big of an accomplishment that actually is.
In honor of my newfound O.K.-ness in the kitchen, I’ve compiled some quotes about cooking that I think should be included in every cook book, so people like me know exactly what they’re getting themselves into.
It’s almost like it’s never even worth the trouble.
This is why I normally go out of my way to avoid cooking. You don’t just make a meal, eat it, and call it a day. It’s a whole thing . You’ve got the prepping and the cooking and the very brief period of eating before you move on to the packing up and the cleaning and…
Honestly? Just order takeout.
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Happy little accidents.
I’m not sure I’ve ever really successfully made an omelet but I’ve definitely made a ton of scrambled eggs in my day.
Which, now that I think about it, all probably started off as a hopeful little omelet in a pan just waiting for the perfect flip that I tragically couldn’t give it.
Season with your heart.
I genuinely never take out a single teaspoon, table spoon, or silver spoon when I’m cooking. If the recipe says I’m putting this much garlic powder into the dish, I’m going to grab my little seasoning container and I’m going to shake it until the universe tells me I’m done.
The universe or my ancestors. Whoever speaks up first.
Please get out of my kitchen.
I love my boyfriend, but I need him to stay as far away from me as possible when I’m trying to cook something. And also, I need him to never offer up suggestions, opinions, or any sort of meal requests.
As soon as I step into that kitchen, an invisible force field goes up and we are no longer able to interact with each other.
