We get it. You’re stressed, overtired, and overworked, but shut the heck up already. The entire world is in the same boat as you are, so stop rocking it with all your darn complaining.
If you had any intellect at all, you would figure out a few unhealthy coping strategies and spend your days living on a prayer like the rest of us.
1. This is the face of a man who is going to cry himself to sleep in a few milliseconds.
Luckily, this isn’t the most expensive bottle of Johnny Walker on the market.
2. Remember, kids, regardless of circumstances, always protect your donuts.
The world is a cold, hard place, and donuts are a hot commodity in this neck of the woods. Carbs are always in style.
3. This is good advice, you should totally take it.
Trust me, you’ll want to take notes. Life isn’t an easy ride, so you better buckle up good, because it ain’t for the faint of heart.
4. Body paint is never a good idea.
Take it from this guy, team spirit is really overrated, especially out in the afternoon sun. I hope he has lots of aloe.
5. I never want to see another person holding a bunch of snakes again.
One snake is already one too many snakes, so obviously seven tangled snakes is beyond reasonable by anyone’s standards.
6. Well, this seems about right.
If you are trying to hold on to your dreams for safekeeping, then you are clearly holding on way too tight. Just let everything go, because life is meaningless.
7. Fish tacos are expensive, so I can totally see this being a decent alternative.
Consider this a lifehack for all you college students slurping down ramen and praying for a little variety.
8. Well, this tattoo is completely unnecessary.
If there’s anything I hate more than unnecessary tattoos, it’s tattoos of armchairs. Don’t even try to tell me there’s some sort of meaning behind this one.
9. I’m officially done with nail trends.
Consider this my actual resignation from the internet. I know you’re probably thinking that this is a bit dramatic, but honestly, teeth nails are basically Satan’s chosen manicure.
10. Sure, cats are cute AF, but they also ruin everything.
I hope you come to the obvious conclusion and avoid getting a cat. If you want to receive constant love and affection, get a dog. They’ll ruin your stuff, but they’ll also interact with you.
11. This seems like a reasonable way to cope with the pressure’s of obtaining your useless undergraduate degree.
Don’t worry about getting good grades, you’ll probably end up working in retail anyway.
12. I wouldn’t even consider drinking this, even if it were the source of eternal youth.
I would much rather sip mud from a puddle, but that’s just my opinion.
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13. Oh, look, a wild tumbleweave on the shores of some majestic lakefront.
This may seem like your average tumbleweed, but don’t be fooled, it’s so much more than that.
14. If you’re matching your nails to your man’s du-rags, then you’re probably way too attached to your man.
I wish I could say that this was cute, but honestly, I find it really creepy.
15. Apparently, you have to jiggle the ATM card slot before sticking your plastic in, and honestly, I’m surprised I haven’t been robbed yet.
I’m not trying to scare you, but these is the facts.
16. It’s always a sad day when your strawberry forgets to shave.
Usually, I would pretty much put anything in my mouth, but I can’t seem to put that giant berry hair behind me.
