Those of you who have ever tried to become BFFs with your mother-in-law are well aware of her unique brand of psychological torture. But snooping? Really? Snooping is the nuclear option of family in-fighting, a horrible act that makes the story of Pandora’s box seem like a Disney musical. On the surface, it seems like something only a tiny handful of truly evil individuals would do. But it turns out that perhaps more than a couple of people among us have enough interior demons whisperings in their ears to make them consider such drastic actions.
Below, you’ll find a very strange and candid story that recently landed on the AITA subreddit , asking the community to decide if this woman was too cruel to her own family or if her mother-in-law and sister-in-law simply crossed the line and deserved punishment. Let us know your thoughts on this situation in the comments.
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27F mother sets a “trap” for her MIL after suspecting she is going through her underwear drawers.
Suspecting her MIL goes through her underclothing, the woman sets a “trap” to confirm suspicions!
Suspecting MIL goes through drawers, the woman sets a “trap” to catch her!
Setting a ”trap” for her MIL, the woman suspects she was snooping in her underwear drawer. Now the family needs to apologize to each other.
When MIL snooping turns out to be true, there’s only one way to handle it
Snooping is an age-old practice, but when it’s your mother-in-law going through your underwear drawer, it’s understandable why it would sting a bit. This woman’s mother-in-law has been exhibiting some suspicious behavior, so the woman set out a trap to prove her suspicion- which her MIL walked right into. Now she and her husband are asking if they’re the a**holes in this situation. Let’s dive into the comments and reactions to this story and see what people have to say.
Setting a “trap” ♀️
The comment author expresses that they are Not The A**Hole (NTA) in the situation, as the person setting the trap is not doing something as extreme or suspicious as hiding a dildo in a cutlery drawer. Replies include humorous comparisons to kitchen supplies, such as a battery-operated vibrator being sold as an immersion blender or a dildo as a hand mixer. Other replies provide comedic suggestions for their housemate’s bedroom antics.
OP ‘ed for keeping in own drawers!
OP was berated in their own bedroom by the mother-in-law for keeping personal belongings in their own drawers. Commenters were shocked by the level of entitled behavior and gave advice to OP to never let these people back into their life again.
Setting a trap ?
The comment suggests that it’s not a trap, but simply the woman’s own drawer and her possessions. Replies echo the sentiment and argue that a draw in someone’s bedroom cannot be considered a trap. Most replies agree that the woman is NTA (not the a**hole). However, one reply claims it is a trap but is justified.
NTA! ♀️ Set a trap and find out!
The comment defends the woman’s right to privacy, suggesting that a trap be set to confirm the MIL’s snooping. Replies pointed out the absurdity of the MIL’s reaction to her son and wife’s use of sex toys and the deep south Christian values in play. One reply remarked that the same concept of ‘Fruit of the Poisoned Tree’ applies to social situations, too.
♀️ MIL’s snooping & shaming!
The commenter is NTA for being in the situation, and instead of supporting her, the husband is trying to shift the blame. The commenter recommends going no contact instead of low, as the MIL’s actions are a violation of her privacy and boundaries, and the family should not be allowed back in the house with their demeaning and invasive behavior.
It’s NTA and to MIL’s prying !
Commenters agree that the OP is Not The A**hole and question why MIL is so interested in her and her son’s sex life. The comment replies point out that it’s inappropriate for MIL to invade the OP’s privacy, even if it’s in her own house and bedroom.
NTA sets a “trap”
The comment is not the a**hole (NTA) for setting a “trap” for her MIL, who was going through her underwear drawers. It is her house, and she has the right to put whatever she wants in her drawers. The comment also states that the MIL and SiL are gross, and that husband needs to apologize to her and put his mother in her place.
‘NTA’: People agree that going through someone else’s underwear drawers is wrong
Multiple people agree that the MIL is wrong for going through the DIL’s underwear drawers and that it should not be done, even if it’s accidental. Some commenters also share their own stories of discovering things they shouldn’t have in someone else’s drawers.
Show them the truth!
The comment suggests that the woman should show everyone the evidence of her MIL’s wrongdoings. A reply suggests that she should show the MIL and SIL too, with a strong sentiment of disapproval.
MIL snooping around!
The commenter found MIL’s behavior unacceptable, as she snooped around in the daughter-in-law’s private space without permission. The commenter suggests people should have a fixed expectation of privacy in their own homes.
Setting a ️♀️ trap for MIL!
The comment suggests that it’s not the a**hole’s fault for setting a trap for the MIL, as it is only a trap if it’s sprung. The comment is complimented for being a good analogy.
Setting a trap
NTA (not the a**hole). The comment strongly advises not to apologize and sensibly compares the situation to setting deterrents and alarms to protect possessions from thieves.
No one likes a snooper
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The commenter finds the situation funny and suggests that the husband should have listened to the woman instead of thinking she was wrong. They seem to suggest that the husband should be embarrassed and ashamed for not believing in the woman.
Set* a “trap” for MIL ♀️
The commenter believes that the mother-in-law and sister-in-law had no right to go through the drawers of the woman’s bedroom. She suggests that the woman had not set a trap, but merely placed things in the drawer. The commenter thinks that the MIL and SIL are the a**holes here for snooping and reacting to the findings. She advises the woman to tell her husband to mature.
Woman *sets a trap* ✔️
The commenter found it ‘hilarious’ that the mother-in-law has been ‘rifling through [the] drawers’. The commenter also advised the husband to ‘grow a spine’ and support the woman. One reply suggested that the mother-in-law called them up to ‘scold them’ since they’re ‘full grown adults’.
Setting a trap ️♀️
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The commenter is proud of the woman who set a trap for her MIL after suspecting that her MIL was going through her underwear drawer. They believe that the woman deserves an apology and not the other way around since the MIL invaded her privacy.
❗️No nosy MILs allowed❗️
The commenter says NTA and that the MIL’s behavior is a nightmare. They suggest setting a trap by rummaging through the MIL’s bedroom to shame her publicly. The reply agrees and loves the idea.
NTA
The commenter expresses disbelief that someone would open a drawer in someone else’s bedroom and states that they are Not The A**hole in the situation.
NTA Sets Trap
The commenter is Not The A**hole and finds the situation hilarious. The commenter defends the OP for storing their sex toys in their own home and suggests that the MIL should be punished by setting a mousetrap in the drawer, as they stuck their noses where they shouldn’t have.
NTA sets a “trap”
The commenter was Not The A**hole (NTA) and condemned the MIL’s behavior of going through the OP’s (original poster’s) underwear drawer. The commenter suggested that MIL should have stayed out of the OP’s stuff to avoid the confrontation and must take responsibility for their own snooping and judgmental behavior.
Setting a trap for MIL ️
The writer says NTA and suggests meeting MIL in public only, as she can’t be trusted in the writer’s home.
Setting up a *trap*!
The commenter said NTA (not the a**hole) and expressed their disbelief at the MIL’s behavior. They argued that the woman is simply organizing her sex toys and that they are her things, so she’s allowed to have them in her room.
Trap set!
Commenter shares thoughts on snooping, wondering what people expect to find. Commenter suggests this is exactly what the MIL was looking for, so why complain about it?
MIL snooping?!
The commenter believes that it’s not the MIL’s business to snoop through her son’s room, and especially through their drawers. They advise the couple to set a trap if they are suspicious.
NTA: MIL’s out of line
Not the a**hole (NTA): OP shouldn’t apologize for something that was her right in the first place and the MIL is out of line for invading her privacy.
NTA: MIL and family
Commenter claims that MIL and SIL are ‘NTA’, according to Dan Savage’s logic that if someone snoops, they can’t be offended by what they find.
Set a trap for MIL!
The commenter advised the person in the article not to apologize to their MIL and firmly expressed that if it were them, their MIL would never be allowed back in the house. One reply added to this sentiment by questioning what the MIL was expecting to find in the underwear drawer to use against the person’s husband to cause trouble.
Trap to catch MIL snooping!
The commenter is NTA for not apologizing and finds MIL’s snooping through her underwear drawer indefensible. They also agree that the woman’s boob job is her own decision and that MIL should mind her own business no matter what the woman does.
Person’s not the a**hole
The comment states that it’s wrong of their MIL to go through the person’s underwear drawers, adding that they need to get over it.
NTA! Breaching privacy!
The commenter believes that the Mother-In-Law should not be excused for her behavior as she brazenly breached the commenter and her husband’s privacy. The commenter believes no apology is necessary.
NTA – No snooping allowed!
The commenter declares that the OP is NTA (not the a**hole) and was not wrong to set a “trap” for her MIL, as snooping deeply violates privacy and deserves the consequences the MIL got.
MIL has no right!
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The commenter asserts that the MIL has no right to go through the daughter-in-law’s stuff or make degrading comments, opining that the husband should have stepped in a long time ago.
Setting strong boundaries
The comment suggested that the woman did not trap her MIL, and her husband should apologize and set strong boundaries with his family. The comment was labeled as NTA (not the a**hole).
NTA! Mom-in-law crosses a boundary
The commenter is Not The A**hole and is appalled that the mother-in-law would have the audacity to behave this way in the presence of the family. A boundary must be set in place before the mother-in-law is allowed back.
NTA! “Fuck around and find out”
The original comment suggests that the MIL deserves to be caught in her own trap; the poster suggests that the woman should not hesitate to take action and find out by herself.
The power of observation!
The commenter strongly believes that the woman did not do anything wrong by setting a ‘trap’ for her MIL. After all, why should she hide things in her own home? The commenter believes that the woman was well within her rights to keep her belongings in a drawer.
Woman sets trap on MIL
The commenter is not the a**hole but suggests that the woman could’ve handled the situation better. They suggest that she should apologize to her husband and that her mother-in-law and sister-in-law can kick rocks.
Protecting your privacy
The comment asserts that the OP was in the right to investigate her MIL’s snooping and is not the a**hole.
NTA: No snooping allowed!
The comment states that the in-laws are a**holes for snooping and judging the OP on things that are none of their business. They are also mentioned as AHs (a**holes) for putting the OP in an embarrassing situation.
Time to leave ❗️
The commenter suggests leaving the current living situation and doing so for a longer time. They believe they are not the a**hole in this situation.
No apologies needed! ♀️
The commenter deemed the MIL’s behavior as inappropriate and childish and reassured the original poster that no apologies were necessary.
Set a glitter✨trap !
The commenter suggests using a glitter bomb to catch out the mother-in-law if she is snooping through her underwear drawers. They are confident the poster is NTA (not the a**hole).
Snooping ⇨ Boundaries ✅
The commenter deemed the poster’s actions as NTA, suggesting that if you snoop, you accept the consequences. They then emphasized that the poster’s partner should respect their boundaries, and support any measures they take to set and enforce them.
NTA! Set a trap ✊
The comment is supportive of the woman’s choice to set a ‘trap’ for her MIL to deal with snooping relatives. The commenter finds it humorous and is in favor of her decision.
✋ ♀️ NTA: Unbelievable misogyny!
The comment stated that NTA (Not The A**hole) that the MIL was exhibiting unbelievable misogyny towards the woman. The commenter was also surprised that the MIL had the guts to lash out her conservative views on them.
Setting a “trap” ️♀️ for MIL!
The commentator asked the original poster to explain how they set a ‘trap’ for their MIL to snoop in their bedroom drawer. They reassured the OP that they were Not The A**hole in this situation. Their humorous suggestion of leaving a trail of rose petals and Hershey’s KISSES from the front door to the drawer implies that the OP has nothing to worry about.
MIL snooping around…
The commenter agreed that the woman was not the a-hole in this situation and hoped it taught her MIL a lesson, although doubtful.
NTA Trapping the MIL ✔️
The commenter declared that the original poster is Not The A**hole and should be happy for her son’s sex life. They also suggested that the original poster should set a trap for her MIL, as they see no fault on the original poster’s end. Furthermore, they find it bizarre that the original poster’s husband expects her to apologize.
“NTA: Actions Have Consequences”
The comment said that the woman was NTA (not the a**hole) and that her husband should have taken her concerns seriously instead of brushing them off. The comment concluded that actions have consequences and that the MIL and SIL got theirs. It suggested banning them from the home since they cannot be trusted to respect the woman.
NTA – Set up a trap ️♂️
The commenter is convinced that the MIL is going through the poster’s underwear drawers, and suggests setting up a ‘trap’ as a solution. The commenter argues that it’s not an intrusive act since the MIL and SIL are guests in the poster’s home.
NTA: Husband needs to protect the wife from MIL’s invasive behavior
The commenter says that the husband needs to get his act together and protect his wife from his mother’s invasive behavior. He should apologize for blaming her for the MIL’s awful behavior and put some boundaries in place before their marriage suffers due to his inaction.
Rearrange sex toys & da bedroom?! NTA!
The comment expresses shock and disbelief that someone would call the occupants into their own bedroom to berate them after invading their privacy and snooping through a private space. The commenter is adamant that the MIL is Not The A**hole.
