Miscommunications can be absolutely infuriating, yet unavoidable sometimes ⏤ whether it be an elderly relative cooking their phone in a curry after being told to put it in rice, or just a simple mixed up food order!
With that in mind, please enjoy these 12+ moments that made us go “That’s not what I thought you meant!”
“My wife asked me if I wanted half her Twix. She thinks this is a game.”
The cookie bit is still nice. However, the beauty of a Twix is the combined effect, creating a truly special eating experience. I’m very passionate about Twix.
“Spilled water on my phone and asked my Grandfather to put it in rice to dry it out. He thought I meant cook it with rice.”
Firstly, they should have done it themselves and not given someone else such a challenging job. Secondly, it’s impressive that they actually managed to kill a Nokia!
McKetchup
Clearly they meant two packets of ketchup and no buns! How do you mess this obvious order up so much?
“Err. I think the kid meant ‘cook.'”
“Hi, is this Daniel’s father? It’s his principal here.”
“Oh, what seems to be the problem?”
“Well, your son has done a drawing, and…well, I think it’s best you come in.”
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“My 2 year old daughter asked for ‘Chicken Cereal’ took me a second to realize what she meant.”
One person in the comments wrote, “I used to describe rice crispies, as the cereal with the two kids and the dad on it. Snap, crackle, and dad.” It took me a while to get why they did that!
“I’m assuming they meant ‘prosecuted.'”
Dear lord, I really hope that they did mean “prosecuted.” Otherwise, I wouldn’t mess around with these Disc Golfers. They’re much angrier than we previously thought.
“My friend went to Scotland, I asked him to buy a bottle of whiskey for me, this is what he bought…”
Some astute people pointed out, “Well you did ask for whiskey and not whisky […] Scotch Whisky does not have an E.” And, to those sad asshats I can only say, “Get a life.”
“Grandmother politely asked me to not leave my condoms in her house. I think I need to politely ask Grandma to upgrade her prescription glasses.”
I’m kind of baffled by how the grandmother just naturally assumed that her grandson would casually leave condoms around her house? This is not normal behavior…
“Kindergarten teacher had students trace their hands for the window… creepier than intended.”
“So, when you said that you wanted to do a ‘scarily good art presentation’ with the kids, this isn’t what I had in mind.”
“Oh, really? What did you have in mind?”
“Some nice drawings perhaps…not something to leave neighborhood kids with nightmares!”
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They really can add a beach-party element to even the driest of presentations! No topic is too dull with these bad boys!
“Wife asked me to pick up Hannukah wrapping paper. The criteria I was given was ‘it should be blue and white’. Mission accomplished.”
I will have to remember this wrapping paper for the next Hanukkah celebration at my partner’s family house. I’m sure it’ll go down great!
They’re Technically Right…
I never got the point of those asinine messages of faux-positivity anyway. They have the exact opposite effect on me and just make me feel angry!
“If only there were a name for this rolling piece of wood.”
It might be a technically accurate description of what it is, but it is weird seeing it called anything other than a rolling pin…and I don’t know why.
“My 13 year old sister thinks she’s hilarious.”
Printing the screenshot is a stroke of genius as well. They will surely regret that carefree “lol” at the end.
“Lies!”
I felt the same level of disappointment when I was a kid and got a yard of Jaffa Cakes, but inside it was just a load of little boxes, not one absolutely massive box of Jaffa Cakes. I still have trust issues because of that.
My girlfriend noticed a stitching error on my boxers. It’s meant to say Animal. I can live with it.”
Never mind it saying “100% Anal” by accident, but what kind of man would go around with underpants reading “100% Animal” in the first place? Get some taste, man, and then this sort of thing won’t happen.
“I stopped and waited at this sign for like 20 minutes an zero people did motocross tricks over a rainbow…”
I hate it when you get your hopes up over something for no good reason! Don’t advertise rainbow-hopping motorcyclists if there are no rainbow-hopping motorcyclists!
“Which superhero is that?”
Knockoff man, knockoff man, does whatever a knockoff does! Can he swing from a web? No, but he’ll nick all your cash! Look out!
“Asked my sister to surprise me with a birthday cake.”
Well, if you think that the decoration is a surprise, just wait until you find out what surprise was hiding in the cake itself!
“As I snapped the selfie, I told Samuel L. Jackson to pose how he really felt about doing these kinds of things.”
Fair play to him for actually posing in the picture in the first place if this is how he feels about the whole thing!
“Wife’s school had BBQ for Teacher Appreciation, she was excited there was a vegetarian option! It was a potato with BBQ sauce.”
Look, is it technically a vegetarian option? Yes! Is it also one of the worst meals I’ve ever seen? Yes!
“My cousin’s Samzong phone!”
I wonder what operating system it uses. Where do people even find these sorts of things, like seriously?
“I found a little baggy of coke today at work.”
Look, let’s just be grateful that you didn’t find any Pepsi. That stuff tastes like Coke that hates you.
“My lady friend wanted a piggy back picture on the beach and a random biker watching the sunset said he wanted one too.”
Look how happy that biker is! you did a good thing making his day, and it looks like he made your day as well!
“My 4 year old niece can’t read and bought me this birthday card because it featured ‘a cute dog with a party hat.'”
They knew fully well what they were doing! No one looks at that dog’s face and thinks that he looks anything other than furious!
“Ah yes, my favorite soda brands.”
You’ve just got to give them the ol’ Dr. Dazzle! Razzle Dazzle ’em! Give ’em an act with lots of Mountain Frost in it!
“A customer came into autozone asking for blinker fluid. He handed me this and said it was about half empty.”
Ah, yes, clearly they have made a big mistake here as the blinkers are not meant to have that liquid inside of them! See, I know all about car parts and working things.
“Bought XL tank tops from Walmart so they’re not skin tight, this is not what I expected.”
He looks like he’s a video game character that’s had his strength buffed up but not had his armor upgraded.
“I expected nothing and I’m still disappointed.”
The only word in that product title they got right was “funny.” Maybe “ceramic,” too.
False Advertising.
The ability to bend nails is a bold claim that Band-Aid should have been ready to defend. But here they are, looking like fools.
“None of the options for my son’s school picture background really caught his personality, so I improvised.”
If this supposedly reflects this kid’s personality, what is he like? Destructive and wild, or is he just a badass?
“Not what I thought would happen when I removed red-eye.”
It’s better with the red-eye. Put it back. I said it’s better with the red-eye please go back this is scaring me.
“Told my friends I saw the new Transformers trailer this morning.”
I dunno, the next movie seems a little bland to me. I’m hoping they up the action again but I think they’re trying to go in a new direction.
“Ordered a blueberry muffin. Got 1 blueberry.”
See, that was your mistake: Everyone knows you need to order blueberrIES muffin if you want any real substance in there.
“He wants to make sure he captures every moment.”
I won’t lie, I actually thought this photo was fake, but it turns out it’s real. This guy was testing these cameras all at once so he could put the footage next to each other and compare them. I don’t know why he chose skydiving as the test, though, I think just driving would have worked.
“I saw the construction crew playing Tetris.”
Is this all construction is? I was under the impression it was, like, math and stuff. I can play Tetris. I could do this.
“Me and my business partner decided to share a hotel room in order to save some money. We weren’t expecting this.”
Yeah, the context of them being business partners makes this worse, but I think a fully glass bathroom is bad no matter who’s there. I don’t need to see anyone go about their bodily functions, thanks.
“I think he was wanting to be a cool superhero or something.”
I can’t tell if he’s genuinely mad, or if that’s because of the makeup, which is kind of perfect. Hides any disappointment, prevents any guilt.
“I asked my 9-year-old son this morning to pack us a lunch. I really regret not checking what he had packed before we left.”
What do you mean? I think five Fruit By The Foot is a perfect lunch. That’s five whole feet of fruit!
“When your mate says he’ll pick you up from the airport on Christmas Eve.”
How else did you expect him to show up? It’s Christmas! You gotta get in the spirit, get pumped!
“At least someone is using the new cat bed.”
Based on the cat’s expression alone, I can tell it was offended at the mere suggestion of change. The dog, on the other hand, is just happy to be there.
“This kid got caught drinking at a party and was interviewed by a local news station, he brought his own microphone.”
“No, no, no, if you want to interview me, you gotta play by my rules, got it? Great, cool, let’s do a sound check.”
“My girlfriend wanted a sponge cake. Still not sure what the problem was.”
I guess she was hoping for something edible, at least. But that’s just a guess, I really couldn’t tell you.
“I’m not sure that’s what they meant…”
I can’t really argue with their thinking. Also, how do parking enforcers know if the car parked there is economically efficient enough to use the space? Do they have tech specs on hand?
“That’s not what I meant, Jesus.”
“Dammit, Jesus, not again. When will you learn that this isn’t funny!”
“Pfft, looks pretty funny form up here, bro!”
“Seriously, Jesus, I’ve got a job interview that I’m gonna be late for!”