When it comes to families, everyone has a different story. Many families are comprised of individuals who identify themselves in many different ways. Unfortunately, not all families are accepting of their family members who may not follow the same path as the rest of the family. Many times, members of the LGBTQ+ community are alienated by their family members simply for being who they are.
Statistics show that over 10-million people living in the United States are part of the LGBTQ+ community.
While that number is quite large, many still face discrimination and hate, despite having come so far in legislation and social norms. Now, more than ever, it’s important for people to understand what it means to be an ally.
Being an ally to the LGBTQ+ community is not hard work.
For example, standing up for individuals you see are being targeted and bullied is a great way to be an ally. Also, showing support by wearing the pride flag and colors is a good way to be an ally, too.
Many families who do have members that are part of the LGBTQ+ community show their support as best as they can.
Sometimes, that simply is as easy as showing your support and acceptance for these members of your family. Other times, it’s representing the community for everyone to see.
One mom recently wrote into Reddit asking if she was wrong for taking down the LGBTQ+ pride flag her son had hung up on their house.
In the popular “Am I The A**hole” subreddit, the mom shared her story. She asked Reddit if she was, “…wrong for telling her son to take his homemade pride flag off the window facing her homophobic neighbors’ house?”
In full context, it’s not her son who is part of the LGBTQ+ community.
In fact, the mom shared that it is her daughter who is bisexual.
“My son is 14M and my daughter is 17F. She is bisexual. My son is not LGBTQ+ (as far as I know), but he feels strongly about being an ally for his sister. My son made a gay pride flag by coloring nine pieces of printer paper and taping them together. I thought it was really beautiful,” she said in her post.
However, her son taped the flag to his window that faced his neighbor’s house.
She asked him to move the flag so she can avoid an issue with her neighbors.
“He then taped it on the window of his bedroom, facing our neighbors’ house, who are homophobic. I asked him to move it to a wall instead of a window and he told me that I was being controlling, when I didn’t believe I was. I just don’t want to be involved in a confrontation with them,”the mom said.
She asked if she was wrong for having him move the flag at all.
Many people on Reddit agreed that this mom was wrong. Some said that she was choosing to, “avoid confrontation” rather than, “stand up for her daughter and her identity.”
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One Reddit user said the mom was wrong, but indirectly.
They wrote:
“Your daughter has been brave enough to tell your family something about herself that may make people reject her.
Your son has made something to support her that he proudly wants to show the world.
You told you son, and indirectly your daughter, that the opinions of the homophobic neighbors are more important than the loving thing your son did and support of your daughter. That support for her is nice, but only if others don’t see it, because it’s not worth having a fight over,” the Reddit user said.
Others said while they, too, are non-confrontational, some things are more important.
One user added:
“I’m also non-confrontational, but some things are worth it. Your son is showing your daughter that he loves and supports her no matter what. You have a great opportunity to follow his example.”
While the mom appreciated the advice, she did say that she wanted to protect her daughter over everything.
The mom edited her post, stating that the family who lives next door is very religious and her biggest fear was her daughter being targeted by them.
She wrote:
“Last year a kid in our neighbor came out as transgender and they told everyone at church to pray for him, and many people did. I would like to avoid that situation. In my honest opinion, I think my daughter having to hear people pray for her, just because of her simple existence and identity, is more damaging than keeping the flag out of the window. This is what I believe. You all may believe differently, and I respect that. I want to do what’s best for my family,” she said.
