When you’re posting or sharing things with friends on social media, you’re always bound to get some sort of commentary or judgment. Sometimes, I believe it’s better to keep our business to ourselves, rather than receive judgment and feedback from others that can be hurtful or rude.
Even if our intentions are pure, there are times when people can read things the wrong way.
There are tons of things in society that symbolize different “meanings.” For example, rainbows are often representative of LGBTQ+ community members.
RELATED STORIES
However, in the parenting community, rainbows mean something else.
Recently, one soon-to-be mother learned that “rainbow” items can be interpreted by others in the motherhood community as a baby born after a woman has a miscarriage or stillbirth.
Learning this from her friend, she asked the Reddit community if she was “wrong” for crocheting her future baby a rainbow-colored blanket, despite the fact that her baby is not a “rainbow baby.”
The mother explained that she loves crocheting and figured that the best way to prepare her three-year-old son for his new baby sister would be to have him help pick out yarn for a baby blanket.
“I decided to let him pick out a color yarn for one of the blankets, and he picked a literal rainbow-colored, vibrant, variegated yarn,” she wrote.
Her son really loves bright colors and rainbows.
“He loves colors and bright things, most baby blankets are done with soft, muted colors, so I had no problem with one blanket in this color. I started working on the blanket a few days ago and have made some decent progress,” she said.
Her crocheting skills are well-known among her friends.
So much so that a friend reached out to see if she could make her a blanket for her sister’s upcoming baby.
“I have several friends who know I crochet, and while I don’t advertise anything I do occasionally [I] do commissions. I had a friend ask me what I was currently working on and if I’d be able to make her a blanket for her sister’s upcoming baby,” she added.
The mom decided to share a picture of the rainbow blanket she was currently working on.
However, the friend found it to be offensive.
“I sent her a picture of the rainbow blanket I’m currently doing, and she asked who it was for. I told her it was for my baby and she asked whether I’d had a secret miscarriage before this baby,” she said.
The friend said that the blanket she was making was “disrespectful.”
“When I told her no, she went off on me saying it was very disrespectful to make myself a rainbow blanket when I hadn’t suffered a miscarriage and therefore I wasn’t having a rainbow baby,” she shared.
The mom shared it hadn’t really crossed her mind when making the blanket.
“This really surprised me as the thought hadn’t even crossed my mind, I have no intention of posting anything about this blanket anywhere or mentioning anything about it, but I can see where someone may think this baby is a rainbow baby if we use the blanket in public,” she said.
She asked Reddit users if she was “wrong” for making that blanket.
As she explained, she was just trying to involve her son in the process and not trying to disrespect those who have lost a baby.
Many people responded to the post, and the majority of users said this woman has every right to use rainbow yarn for this blanket.
A Reddit user who had had a number of miscarriages weighed in.
“I’ve had 7 miscarriages and I’ve never heard of this [expletive]. Rainbows are a broad symbol and they aren’t owned by any particular group. If you like rainbows, make a rainbow blanket,” she said.
Another mother agreed that rainbows are not “reserved” just for mothers who have experienced loss.
“Speaking as someone currently pregnant with a rainbow baby…
“… Rainbows aren’t reserved for those of us that have suffered miscarriages. Your friend is an [asshole], more so if she herself hasn’t had a miscarriage because then she has no right to comment.
“You finish your blanket and congratulations on your pregnancy,” another mother added.
One other Reddit user said that it’s simply the color her son chose, nothing more, nothing less.
“You’re crocheting your baby a blanket out of colors your son picked and you like. Period. The colors do not have to mean anything and it’s silly for people to be upset with you if they choose to misinterpret this,” another added to the thread.
Another added that rainbows are supposed to represent inclusivity.
“The irony of trying to make rainbows less inclusive. A key [expletive] point of using rainbows as a symbol is that they contain all the colours and therefore represent inclusion! Nobody gets to tell anyone else they can’t like rainbows,” they said.
Other Reddit users pointed out that rainbows are gender-inclusive.
“I make rainbow crochet blankets because they are gender neutral so they can be used for multiple children,” one person wrote on the Reddit thread.
Another Reddit user also said that she wouldn’t wrap her rainbow baby in a rainbow blanket anyway.
“Honestly, as a mom who had multiple miscarriages before my son was born, the idea of wrapping him in a special blanket to signal to the world that he’s a rainbow baby kind of horrifies me. My history and that of his unborn siblings is absolutely not something I would ever want people viewing as a piece of his identity. It’s mine to carry; it shouldn’t ever be his,” she wrote.
Where do you stand on this one?
