While pregnancy can be an incredibly beautiful time for a couple, it can also be extremely stressful. There are so many things to plan and consider in preparation for a new baby to be brought into a family.
The truth is, each family has to do what works for them, and sometimes it’s difficult to make certain decisions, especially when they could rub some people the wrong way.
There is no uniform way to prepare for a new baby.
When it comes to more practical choices, most soon-to-be parents begin shopping for the necessities and getting the new baby’s room ready together.
However, when it comes to the ever daunting birthing plan, many parents have to find what works for them, even if they’re not all on the same page.
It’s not always easy for couples to compromise on the big decisions.
Many of us have our own concept of the way things should be done and what it means to be a respectful partner. And even if we think we’re completely in sync with our partner, the differences in outlook can lead to strife.
Not all moms march to the beat of the same drum.
For many people, it’s conventional for the father and maybe one other family member to be in the birthing room when the baby is born. However, due to restrictions put in place because of the pandemic, some hospitals allow only one person in the delivery room.
And though it may seem unusual, not all moms would choose the father of their child as the one person allowed in.
One mom chose to have her sister be the sole person allowed in the delivery room, and not her husband.
The mom announced that she wanted her sister in the delivery room and not her husband, which really threw him for a loop.
The offended husband took to Reddit to ask if his reaction was unreasonable.
In an Am I The Asshole post on Reddit , the husband explained that he was incredibly hurt by his wife’s decision.
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“I had been excited about being there with her and experiencing that moment ever since she told me she was pregnant — really even since we started trying to get pregnant,” he wrote. “I just always assumed she would want me there.”
His wife didn’t really provide a reason for her choice.
According to his wife, it wasn’t out of spite or because she thought he’d messed up as a husband or future parent.
“It doesn’t seem like she has a real list of reasons why her sister was chosen. It’s just a feeling.”
In response to this decision, he stated that he wouldn’t drive her to the hospital when she went into labor.
Finally, the husband decided that he wouldn’t take her to the hospital if she didn’t want him in the delivery room, saying that he’d basically just be her taxi driver.
In response, his wife went to stay with her family for a few days.
Reddit users had some pretty definitive responses for this dad-to-be.
One person expressed: “She’s the one giving birth and her comfort is of the utmost paramount. If this is how you react then maybe she has a point to not want you there.”
Another said: “You’re not an asshole for wanting to be there the moment your child is born. You are a HUGE asshole for punishing her by saying she can find her own ride to the hospital and that you’ll withhold other support on the day.”
While some people offered words of support, for the most part the feelings were unanimous.
“His response to her choice of support person seems to speak to why he isn’t her first pick,” one person commented. “He’s making it all about him, and labelling himself some paragon of logic while he does it.”
Overall, the consensus was that although he had a right to be hurt, his reaction was way off the charts.
“I’d be incredibly hurt too if I were OP and I understand his reaction bc I’d think of doing the same but his reaction still isn’t justified.”
As it turns out, there was something else at play.
In an addendum, the husband explained that things got worse. He reached out to his wife to ask when she’d be coming home and he got what was to him an unsurprising response.
“She said that she wasn’t, as I had suspected. She confirmed what I’d guessed which is that she has no plans to come back any time soon, so someone in her family will be driving her anyway.”
HIs reaction to the news helped cement what some people had suspected all along.
“We’ll see what happens after the baby is born but I don’t think it’s likely we’ll stay together, and given our differences and differing views on marriage that may be for the best anyway,” the husband wrote.
This led the Reddit community to double down on their assessment of his behavior.
He was declared most definitely the a–hole.
The husband also admitted that he had already talked to a divorce lawyer expecting that they would be splitting up for good, and that he planned on asking for a paternity test to confirm the child was in fact his.
All of which only served to confirm people’s suspicions.
“Turns out OP is the kind of dick to immediately run to a divorce lawyer and I’m guessing the wife knew it as well,” someone commented.
What do you think about this situation? Do you think he’s justified or did you suspect that divorce was looming? Let us know in the comments.
