It is easy to look at a situation from the outside and voice our opinions on what someone should or shouldn’t have done.
However, it’s unfair to give all decision making equal weight. Sometimes, people are simply choosing between two restaurants to eat at. Other times, they are forced to make a decision that no one should have to make.
When we make difficult choices, especially when it comes to family, regret is a common fear.
We’re afraid that raising our children one way will prevent them from being who they could’ve been. We’re afraid that not going on that dinner date prevents us from creating a family at all.
These kinds of big choices always make us feel as if our life is at a crossroads, with one wrong decision resulting in catastrophe.
One man recounts how he recently made the hardest decision of his entire life.
A Reddit user writes that he was put in a situation in which he had to choose between two incredibly important events in his life, and according to his wife, he chose wrong.
His wife went into labor a few weeks earlier than expected.
Unfortunately, her water broke about a half hour after he had already left to visit his dying father.
The man’s wife called him and expected him to join her at the hospital. One one hand, he wanted to be there to support her, but on the other, he felt as though that afternoon would be the last time he would ever see his father.
He was forced to choose between being present for the death of his father or the birth of his child.
This is an impossible choice to make. How do you choose between your child and your parent? Between two moments that will impact your life forever?
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He ended up choosing to see his father, who died a few hours later.
“I decided to see my father one last time and i felt like it was more important than seeing my child’s birth because i will raise him and see him everyday for the next 18+ years,” he wrote, “I really need to say some things to my father before he dies.”
His wife and her family are angry that he missed the birth of his son.
Their argument is that he needed to be with his wife to support her during the birth, as childbirth is a stressful and potentially dangerous event.
The man felt as though reconciling with his estranged father before his death was more important.
Surprisingly, a lot of people understood the man’s position.
One Reddit user commented that there was no “correct” choice that the man could’ve made.
“You needed to be there wife your wife. You needed to be there with your dad. Literally a life and death situation, you could only be at one place.”
Others voiced the opinion that though the man isn’t at fault, his wife has a right to be angry.
“Labor is not safe, especially in the US” one person wrote, “especially unplanned early labor…It’s understandable that she’s angry, it’s understandable that he went with his dad.”
Overall, most people showed a lot of empathy for the man and his situation.
How do you make an impossible decision?
In situations like this, some people will think you chose wrong, and some people will think you chose right.
As you are the one who has to live with your choice, your opinion is the only one that truly matters.
