In recent years there has been a rise in the call for gentle parenting and while the exact definition of this parenting technique is disputed by many across the internet, it’s been generally discussed as the current best way to raise your kids.
The parenting style has been disputed by many across the internet, and some parents just find it too exhausting.
Gentle parenting is said to be based on mutual understanding
While the exact definition of the style varies, it’s generally understood to be parenting based on mutual respect between the parent and the child.
It’s where the parent allows the child to express their emotions at full capacity, teaches them how to deal with it and then eventually allows them to make their own decisions.
Parents always aim for the best for their children
The parenting technique originally stemmed from the idea of not wanting your children to inherit your trauma or bad habits.
This is completely understandable and all parents try their best to ensure this regardless of the label of their parenting style, but this one especially sparked a lot of debates on the internet in the past few years.
The parenting style is about soft speaking
Gentle parenting is understood to be about soft spoken suggestions rather than harsh ultimatums or orders.
With this style, instead of a parent telling their child they’d be in time-out if they don’t stop crying, they would instead ask them to try and calm down.
Why it has become exhausting to some
Parents always want the best for their kids, so how is gentle parenting any different?
In an article about the parenting style in The New Yorker, it’s said that the style is often differently interpreted by each parent, and the label ‘gentle parenting’ is more of a trend than a specific doctrine.
It’s also understood by many to be dismissing the parent
As the style focuses on softly speaking to the child, many parents feel as though it also asks them to suppress their emotions.
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In a post made on TikTok, a mother shared that she finds the style to eventually become exhausting.
The mother shared an article about it
In her video, the mother shared an article that acknowledged gentle parenting to have become too rough for parents.
She explained her opinions on the style saying, “I’m not surprised that this is happening, I’m actually kinda glad because it was too much.”
Sharing her views on the matter, it was difficult
She acknowledged that the style has a lot of pros, “As someone who was really trying to gentle parent and taking in all the information and learning the tools and the strategies […] there’s a lot of valuable stuff in there but it was too much.”
The issue was that it felt too extreme
The parenting style has taken its rounds on social media and the definitions of how it should be done have tended to be taken to the extreme by some.
The mother said, “I feel like gentle parenting is one far end of the parenting spectrum and we gotta reign it into the middle.”
People in the comments agreed with her
In the comments under the mother’s video, many people agreed with her.
One person said, “I agree. I think the most important thing is to explain things to kids so they have a chance to understand… as well as validate their feelings. I try not to yell, but if I do… I always apologize.”
Others recognize that the definition of gentle parenting has been lost
Another person under the video commented, “I feel like gentle parenting gets a bad rap because most people don’t actually know what it entails and confuse it with permissive parenting.”
Because of the disputes around what gentle parenting is actually like in practice, many acknowledge that it’s difficult to keep up with it.
