Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the Game Of Thrones version of Keys To The V.I.P .
Today we answer the question: how is it that Podrick Payne is so good at pleasing ladies?
RELATED STORIES
Man, “Game Of Thrones” sure has been a ride.
While we may be sad it’s the last season, we’ve seen all sorts of cool stuff: evil snow zombies, dragons, magic, violence, everything a growing fan needs to fall in love with a show.
We’ve also been blessed with a litany of… love scenes.
A lot of people have bumped uglies during the show’s run, whether it be Cersei and Jamie (ew), Jon Snow and Daenerys (a paring which we eventually discovered to be ew) and more recently, Arya and Gendry (uh… possibly ew, but in a “we’ve watched this girl grow up” kind of way).
But one character has baffled us the most, sexually, at least.
That would be the character of Podrick Payne, the young squire of Tyrion Lannister and distant cousin of the more famous Ser Ilyn Payne.
Who we’re sure is doing just fine.
He’s had quite the history during the show’s run.
He debuted during Season 2, where he would eventually go on to save Tyrion’s life.
Since then, he has become one of the show’s most mysterious characters, and a secret fan favorite.
But there’s one thing about Podrick that people have come to wonder about…
And that would be: “how is he so good at l********g?”
No, we don’t get to see any explicit s*x scenes with the young squire during the series, but there is one scene in particular where that question is first asked.
It all starts when Tyrion and Bronn bring Podrick to a brothel to lose his virginity
They hire three p*********s and send the young squire on his way.
Later, he returns with the bag of gold in hand, saying that the ladies of the night enjoyed the experience so much they refused payment.
Tyrion and Bronn are, understandably, shocked.
Of course they are!
For those of us who remember our first times, I would be willing to bet they probably wouldn’t shock anyone. And if they were with escorts, there’s a good chance they wouldn’t refuse payment.
Even the “fille de joie” Ros boasts about his talents
In an exchange with Varys, she says that “it wasn’t about his size, it was about what he did ” and goes on to say that while the three working girls he was with are usually very descriptive, this time they said the experience was “hard to describe”.
So how is lil’ Pod so good at pleasing ladies?
Well, some might attribute it to his singing, which he showed off in the most recent episode of Game Of Thrones .
During a scene where a bunch of them are sitting around the fire, Tyrion asks someone to sing a song, and Podrick steps up.
Podrick sings “Jenny’s Song” and we’re treated to a scene that is reminiscent of when Pippin sang “All Shall Fade” in Lord Of The Rings .
The scene is beautiful, but Podrick’s voice is even prettier.
So could this be how he’s so good at pleasing women? Some might think it’s his beautiful voice.
What do you think his secret is?
Could it be his singing? Or maybe there’s another trick we haven’t seen yet. Let us know your thoughts!
Last Updated on April 22, 2019 by Jake Bean
