There’s a lot to love about being a freelancer. You set your own hours and have control over what kinds of contracts you take, for starters.
But with all the good comes some bad. Workflow isn’t always consistent, you miss out on benefits salaried workers may have. And you have to deal with some pretty… unique clients from time to time.
The Twitter account Clients From Hell posts some experiences anonymously submitted to them. And man, it’s wild out here.
That’ll teach ’em!
I love the fact that the client thought they did something by… doing nothing. I guess they don’t understand that freelancers can have more than one contract going at a time.
I can’t text, I lost my phone!
Yeah… I’m pretty sure we’ve all done this exact thing before, either with the phone in our hands, or the pair of glasses on our head. It’s literally only funny when it happens to someone else, though.
It’s witchcraft!
I laughed at this way harder than I probably should’ve. I seriously wonder how long it took them to figure out the logic behind this, because they clearly aren’t getting it in the moment.
“I just wanted to give myself a pat on the back.”
I don’t know what it is with some clients and not wanting to actually pay their contracted workers, but this is pretty ridiculous. Imagine going to a store and only paying half price for something because you feel like it.
The truth behind the Google algorithm:
Imagine if Google actually ranked everything by alphabetical order. We’d have countless companies going by names like “AAAA” or something just to stay on top.
Thankfully, it doesn’t actually work like that.
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When you want something that’s brighter than white:
I love the way the client acts like the freelancer just performed a literal miracle. I guess this is what happens when you have to deal with someone who knows zero about computers.
I hate to break it to you, my dude…
But yeah, the freelancer is absolutely thinking that. On the plus side, at least the computer wasn’t broken. It was nothing more than a little human error.
Could’ve done it with a little more pizzazz, though.
Some clients truly want the impossible, and then are real confused when their weird demands aren’t met. I’ll never get that. Like, what are they realistically expecting?
“No buying before you tell us what you haven’t bought yet!”
The logic behind this is astounding. I get that they want feedback as soon as possible, but they also need to sell some stuff before they can get it…?
Not that deadline, the other one.
So, you know how freelancers are bound to contracts for certain jobs with certain employers? Yeah, that usually means clients can’t arbitrarily move a deadline whenever they feel like it. Tough luck.
Sounds realistic.
If you’ve ever made a 20 minute video, you know that it’s going to take a lot more than a single workday to complete it. The amount of takes you might have to do is already going to eat up half the day, let alone edit it.
And don’t forget about how much time it takes to write a script!
There’s a different letter, so it must be a different thing entirely!
I wonder if this client knows that Gmail is, in fact, a kind of email. Or… maybe they genuinely think that Gmail is its own thing.
Oh man. My hope for humanity just flew down the toilet.
“That little icon on your desktop. You know, the server.”
I truly hope that this client doesn’t have access to the actual webpage server. Or the webpage at all, for that matter, because they’d probably destroy it in a few seconds.
A totally not weird thing to say to someone working for you.
You don’t even need to be a freelancer to relate to this. It’s just weird, man, but I can totally see some really weird, boundary-passing boss asking this to any of their young employees.
I thought it was supposed to say “password.”
This doesn’t sound real. Like, it can’t be real. It’s the year 2022, and you’re telling me that there are still people out there who have never typed a secure password into a computer before? How!?
No users, just the users.
In case you didn’t know, UX stands for user experience. As in, something that directly affects users. So, does this client really know what they’re talking about?
I’m getting mixed messages here.
I guess, when you work with enough picky clients, you have to figure out how to price yourself accordingly. How much do you want to be “you design everything” actually means ” we design everything,” and vice versa?
It’s all the same price, right?
Didn’t you know? Every website that’s ever existed costs the exact same to build.
Or at least, that’s what some people like to believe, I guess.
Sometimes 100% actually means 1000%, so you have to be really clear.
I wonder if this client ever took a math class in their life before. As a human being who can count, I promise you that it would never be out of 1000%.
Didn’t you hear? Five-year-old girls are the only demographic ever.
I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume the kid isn’t a recovering addict, and probably doesn’t even know any recovering addicts. So, she’s not really going to be a good point of reference for this kind of thing.
But I didn’t need to tell you that.
