Parenting is a tough job nobody really teaches you. I bet most folks would agree with that. It’s basically a combination of what our parents taught us, as well as a product of our and our partner’s life experiences that we try to pass on to our kids.
While some parents practice gentle parenting , others opt to show some tough love. Which way is right, I don’t know. But I’m about to give you some tips from a professional who recently posted her opinions on TikTok. Let’s check it out.
Jess, who goes by @strongtherapy on TikTok, is a licensed therapist.
She’s been in practice for 20 years, so she has learned a thing or two. And recently, she shared with her audience the five things she does not do with her kids.
So let’s look at her advice to parents.
Here’s her number #1 rule:
“I ask for consent when I go to hug my kids,” she says. “I teach them the importance of bodily autonomy and advocating for themselves and saying ‘no’ when they’re uncomfortable.”
What do you think of that?
RELATED STORIES
I think that’s a great approach.
She also doesn’t comment on her kids’ bodies or her own in front of her kids. Instead, she focuses on discussing the importance of physical activity and nutrition but without talking about body types. Interesting, huh? I tend to agree with that too.
Here’s a big one.
Jess doesn’t compare her kids to each other or ask them to change something about themselves to be more like their siblings. I don’t know about you, but I think that’s pretty healthy too. I used to hate when my mom compared me to my cousin, who did better in school than me.
Here’s an interesting one.
She also doesn’t discuss finances with her kids. “I don’t talk about how much money I make or where my money goes,” she says. “That’s not for them to be concerned about.”
Hmm, I don’t know if I agree with that. I think the sooner you talk about money with your kids, the better. I wish somebody taught me about investing early on.
This is how she deals with food.
Jess doesn’t place any value on food, nor does she punish or reward her kids with food.
It’s a tricky one. You definitely want to let kids know which food is better for them, but you shouldn’t make them feel bad for eating sweets or cake, for example. I think there’s a fine line between how you discuss food in general.
Since her first video was so well received, Jess decided to make a follow-up.
In that one, she shared five more things she doesn’t do with her kids. She doesn’t shame or judge them for anything related to gender expression.
Here’s another interesting one.
In Jess’ household, her kids can express any emotion they have, big or small. Wow! That’s great, huh?
Here’s something that might sound controversial to some, but Jess doesn’t place value on grades or judge her kids by them. Instead, she’ll work with her kids and their teacher on any issues that may need improvement.
And to wrap this up here are a few more.
Jess doesn’t use fear as motivation, and I think that’s pretty self-explanatory. That’s never a good way to go.
And the last one some people could question too. She doesn’t teach her kids to just trust authority figures no matter what. She instills in her kids that trust and respect are earned. Amen to that. I wholeheartedly agree with this approach.
How about you? What do you think about these parenting rules?