Do you remember when life had that carefree glaze across it which just made everything seem so exciting and full of fun? I don’t either really, but I do remember a time when the most important thing in my life wasn’t paying taxes but was how many keepie uppies my friends and I could do.
Well, there are others out there for whom adulting is not what it was cracked up to be and aren’t happy about it one bit! So, with that in mind, here are 19+ people who are here for a good time, not a long time! Because hey, you only live once!
True Poetry
This Tweet is so real/ That I need a glass of wine/ And a power nap.
A What?
I never got the memo about the crockpot. Although, I do own a potato ricer, which is a sentence I never thought would be applicable to me.
Nihilism 101
There is no feeling quite like feeling that you are too old to get a sugar daddy. It’s an important milestone in everyone’s life.
Do It For The Vine
Where else are people meant to get good Tweetable content from if not from deliberately sabotaging their own love life and general happiness?
The Real “Adult Juice”
Don’t forget to stay hydrated! There’s your friendly reminder for the day, so don’t think I don’t do anything for you!
Ladies And Gentlemen, This Is Baby Number 5!
Take one step left and one step right, one to the front and one to the side, clap your hand once and clap your hands twice, and if it looks like this then you doing adult life right!
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Help!
You’re never too old enough to lose your parents when out shopping. That is something that you always retain no matter your age.
The Price You Pay For Your Health
It is heartbreaking looking at how much money goes on necessities when you’re just thinking about how many shots that could have bought you back in the day!
Live A Little!
Mixing all of your washing together is the adult version of mixing drinks during one drinking game in college.
*Angry And Forlorn Noots*
Just shut up and take my love! It’s been cut out of pink card and sprinkled with red glitter so you know I’m Goddamn genuine about it!
*Sighs*
Come on people, there’s so many good books out there! And as much as I love this frankly bizarre archaic picture, I don’t endorse the message!
The Arrogance Of Youth
Come back when you’ve got some life experience youngster! Once you’ve experienced all the things on this list, we can bond over a bowl of Coco Pops soaked in Prosecco.
Lodgers Are The Worst
Sure, this seems like a good idea, but just wait until they pay you in ghost money! The exchange rate is absolutely dire at the moment, you’re better off not getting involved.
Tupperware, More Precious Than Gold!
You’re brave taking your only Tupperware to work with you! Just wrap your stuff in a ziplock like those of us who are cripplingly safety-conscious!
The Million Dollar Question
There’s nothing wrong with holding out hope for that one day that they text back saying, “Actually, something has happened and you don’t need to come in today!”
Renew Your Subscription?
Contrary to popular belief, there is no manager you can speak to. Looks like you’re on your own!
Emotionally Stable
This guy really has his scheduling down to a fine point. “Dave, could you schedule me in a five-minute wail at the library on Thursday at 3:35 please?”
Stone Cold Steve Auskitten
Cats wouldn’t protect you if their life depended on it… which it kind of does!
Defcon 1
Any problem that includes the word toilet should be passed off to absolutely anyone else possible. Unless the problem is, “There’s too much money flying out of this clean, unused toilet, and I can’t carry it all! Can you help?” Not very likely though.
Healthcare
There should be a Tinder-style app for this kind of setup, where you can match with doctors, go on a date, and also ask menial health questions.
