There are some people who just can’t contain themselves. No matter what the situation, be it after being told to keep a secret, to people not being able to keep away from the guest’s food in the fridge, these are the people with absolutely no self control!
So, without further ado, why not welcome in that Friday feeling of extravagance with these 15+ tweets for people who just can’t help it!
A Steal!
In fairness, where is the fun in getting a bargain without being able to rub your savings in people’s faces?!
It’s Not Their Fault Jeez!
Yeah, look at you there being all high and mighty, just because you want to keep all of your blood in your body!
Panic Stations
I guess it’s good that she cares? That’s got to be better than her not caring at all, even if the cops do get involved.
Never Give In!
Some people just can’t help but be rebellious. I wish I had that problem, but I’m not the “revolutionary” type.
Leave Your Hair Alone!
Whenever I get stressed I always pull at my hair, and normally end up looking like Ken Dodd! (Does that reference still translate? Let me know if you know who Ken Dodd is in the comments, it would be a massive help!)
Ruining The World One Dollar At A Time
I’d have bought an island and disappeared before you could say, “distribute the wealth”!
Planning Ahead
Planning ahead is for dweebs! I didn’t spend my adult life winging my way through situations because it is easy, I did it because it’s cool!
The Language Of Love
That line between funny and offensive is a really thin line. So thin in fact that you often can’t even see it until you have mysteriously passed it!
Never Gonna Stop
Look, if people buy food and it’s in the fridge, I’m going to have a snack. I can’t help it, it’s an illness and I will not hear arguments against this fact.
Calm Down Brittany!
I hate it when your old friend’s or acquaintance’s partners have zero chill. No one has the time to be appeasing your insecurity complexes Brittany!
Appease The Gods
It is easier to accept this as your life than trying to fight it. You’ll just end up dropping an ice cube anyway, at least this way it was your choice!
For The Double Texters Amongst Us
Just need to go and quickly put all of my WhatsApp chats into a spreadsheet.
But… He Can Help It…
I never understood why that was an appropriate excuse. Like, the world has still changed, and they’ve been here while it has changed? Just don’t be a d**k!
Littering
Sure, this might not be an overly funny one, but I wanted to put it in just to say that if you litter, you’re a bad person. Seriously, how were you brought up?
Stand Together!
Some people just cannot help but come up with consistently amazing ideas. I wish I had such a forward-thinking attitude.
Candy Crush Addict
Of all the games in all the world, why would you choose to try and be the best at Candy Crush? Someone needs to get this guy’s mother Zelda Breath Of The Wild, or d**n Tetris at the very least!
The Dad Joke Addiction
A dad joke about a dad… it’s dad-joke-ception. (And yes, I know that inception means the beginning not things within things, but pop culture references are more important than accuracy these days)
Marriage Problems
I mean, I hope she was going to say marriage, not marmalade or something weird like that!
Who Is The Dummy Now?
But, aren’t we all really puppets, just living out the bizarre fantasies of some omnipotent being?
Low Threshold
Look, I just have to say that I will never understand why people drink white claws. Have a proper drinking if you’re going to drink! Just have a Guinness like a normal person, it’s like a meal after all!
Last Updated on February 21, 2020 by Paddy Clarke