Everybody has problems in their life, that’s a lesson we all learn early on when we’re being taught the “don’t judge a book by its cover” philosophy.
But just because we shouldn’t judge people, doesn’t mean we can’t judge their problems, like the ones on this list that we never expected anyone to have.
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“In-laws invited us over for dinner; it was a trap.”
Well, duh, you can’t have dinner without somewhere to sit and eat!
“The snow broke the plow and now he’s stuck.”
Does this mean you have to call a snow plow plow?
“Thought I’d make some pasta with the last of my homemade tomato sauce from my garden last summer. Guess I’d better think again.”
Phew, that lid is looking pretty heated, did you two get in a fight or something?
“LED lightbulb collapsing into itself.”
Like a black hole, but artificial and in your house.
“Apparently I needed some more iron in my diet.”
Aren’t nails usually made of steel? This might not even have helped!
“Ramen packet with no dust.”
This is just a quality of life tip, if you eat ramen, learn to season it yourself, and add your own veggies! It makes a world of difference, I promise.
“My popcorn got stuck so I tried buying the chip bags on the top to knock it all down and got this.”
You’ve created a golden ratio of desperation and crushed dreams.
“Zipper got stuck in a park bench.”
The odds of this happening and also being so bad that the zipper needed to be removed entirely are so slim, I’m more impressed that it happened at all.
“Covered in poison ivy….but making the most out of it.”
Pros to coming in contact with poison ivy: You can get a little lizard friend.
“My new knife opened in my pocket.”
Sad for your pants, but that could have ended way, way worse!
“Somehow chucked a dirty nappy in the washing machine this morning.”
I was going to make a snarky “check your pockets” type comment, but I don’t think that’s where you’d put a diaper.
“Leeches, after a bush walk in Australia.”
Huh. Didn’t know leeches could be that small. I will now be obsessively checking my clothing after coming in from any excursion forever, thank you.
“Finally caved and bought the kids a box of 60 oreo packs through Amazon. Today it arrived and this is what we got!”
I hope you have two kids, otherwise you’re going to have a tough time figuring out how they can share this.
“Found my keycard after cancelling it earlier.”
Now, here is where I can make my snarky comment about checking your pockets. Check your pockets before washing your clothes, you never know what could be in there!
“Hope you didn’t like your patio furniture.”
He not only ripped up the seat of that chair, but the top and the one in the back too. He really wants the coziest nest on the block.
“My cart broke in the middle of grocery shopping.”
I knew I had a reason to not trust those carts with janky wheels, this could happen at any moment!
“Bikes behind our Sheriff’s department.”
That seems like a lot. Are we certain the sheriff is completely innocent here?
“[Conjoined] page in my chemistry textbook.”
Hopefully you won’t need any of the information that’s traped between those pages!
“Been waiting 6 weeks for a rather expensive toilet so we can fit it at a client’s house, it has finally arrived.”
I’ve seen expensive furniture that’s pretty abstract, but this just looks nonfunctional.
“In the process of moving to a new house my dog took up a new diet of drywall and cardboard.”
I get it, I stress eat too! Though I usually go for ice cream instead of paint.
“I was eating a bag of sour gushers and there was an eye contact inside of the bag… Didn’t realize until I was chewing on it.”
Someone on the assembly line had a pretty blurry day after losing that.
“Any advice how to clean that up!”
Pray it was all a dream, or that it simply vanishes overnight.
“I ate a misfortune cookie.”
Details would have been appreciated, but at least it’s concise.
“Saw this on my walk.”
People who do this are the epitome of “out of sight, out of mind.” Detrimentally so.
“Thought somebody had crashed a car into our kitchen at 5:30 this morning. No, it was just our glass table smashing itself to bits.”
Thank god the base caught those bananas, wouldn’t want them getting bruised!
“Amazon decided to put a sticker on my glass door.”
Amazon uses stickers? Whatever happened to those tidy post-it-note-esque slips that UPS and the others use?
“A co-worker left his bagback hanged outside for a while (yup that’s a bee swarm).”
I don’t’ think that’s your coworker’s bag anymore. It belongs to the bees now.
“Looks like I’ve got to shotgun my smoothie…”
You have to get your daily servings of fruit in somehow!
Cold.
Some things, no matter how sentimental you want them to be, are better asked through a text. Way less effort that way.
“I have to untangle this at work.”
No joke, I love untangling stuff like this, it’s very satisfying. Is your job hiring?
“Its 1:30AM. I heard a burst of water and smelled something horrible. Thought maybe the ceiling was leaking but it was just this melon exploding.”
On the bright side, this is way easier and less expensive to clean than a leaking ceiling.
“I just bought my first apartment and the day I got the keys, the bathroom mirror fell and shattered everywhere, creating a hole in the sink in the process.”
Most sinks only have one hole, but now yours has two, that’s just more efficient!
“‘We I.D.’ sign Y2Ks 20 years after the new millennium.”
“Sorry, can’t sell you these, check the sign.”
“But…I’m 53.”
“What did I just say? Check. The sign.”
“I’m trapped forever. Me in my bedroom, trying to catch her, [her] propped in the doorway.”
The way this is written, it could be either the human person or the spider writing it, and both are equally as funny.
“There’s a plant growing on the side of this car that just parked beside me.”
Is this what they mean when they say a car is “green”?
