There are days that the world can really get on top of you. As in, “older sibling sitting on your chest and won’t let you up” kinda days.
OK, full disclosure: I was the older sibling sitting on chests. But I’m over that phase. Now it’s the world’s turn to suffocate me .
But at least I’m not at the end of my rope like these poor souls.
1. Sometimes it seems like the only thing that could make your day better is pizza…then it gets cruelly ripped away.
And by “ripped away,” I mean “you put it in upside-down somehow, you dummy.” How does this happen?
2. Did you know that in Australia, the toilet paper screams counterclockwise?
Like, am I more concerned with making sure that I’m clean, or about the dang wildlife in this bathroom? A question no one should have to answer.
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3. Of course, I may actually be OK with any spidery bathroom as long as I have some kind of privacy.
I mean, even if the spider’s watching, I know it’s not going to tell anybody about…that condition I have.
4. OK…so what I’m learning today is that no bathroom is really safe at all.
What is my life? I’m going to be searching bathrooms for arachnids, window-placement, and air horns forever now? This isn’t sustainable behavior, y’all.
5. Ouch…the forgetful phone float-y maneuver. A classic tragedy of our age.
Her face is all of us when we think we’ve janked our phones…most of us get a look of relief a minute later, though.
6. You just know this person is like, “Whatever. If we go into a tunnel, I’ll just buy new stuff at my destination.”
I mean, at the very least, it’s a great way to get a new vacation wardrobe.
7. “Yo, if Oscar the Grouch isn’t here in 15 minutes, we are legally allowed to leave.”
That’s just me making a joke so I don’t actually cry at how sad this pic makes me.
8. Hmm. If this was ordered through one of those self-checkout screens, there’s no one to blame but the customer.
Literally any other scenario, that’s your whole day ruined right there.
9. “I was so desperate for a selfie…it had been five whole minutes since my last one.”
You know she went straight to the mirror, too. Otherwise, the urinals would’ve tipped her off.
10. Man, Hollywood is so obsessed with remakes. Check out this promotional image for Hansel & Gretel 2: Electric Boogaloo.
In the next installment in the series, they’re gonna have chicken dipped in breadcrumbs. Now that’s genius.
11. Dogs are the greatest gift that humanity has given itself, and shame on you for toying with your pup’s emotions.
But technically, you did succeed at startling him, so there’s that.
12. This…does not look like a cookie that I would call “delighted.” Actually, it’s exactly the opposite of that.
But I guess marketing them as “Pumpkin Depression” doesn’t have the same pizzazz.
13. Ouch. I’d almost prefer the pool-soaked one.
At least you know that one’s not gonna slice up your butt when you put it back in your pocket.
14. Oof. Just…just…oof.
If you ever needed proof that the universe doesn’t like you and won’t ever let you be happy…
I mean, hopefully, this person is OK now, but…
Oof.
15. I’m gonna go ahead and assume that this happened in the morning.
And if that means it happened before that fella got a sip of the good stuff, well…I’m just so sorry.
16. So remember, sometimes the world gets ya down, but it’s not all bad.
After all, sometimes you’re the jumper, and other times you’re the jerk who tips the rope. So enjoy!
