See that mushroom cloud out in the distance? That’s not a terrifying look into the near future (eh, let’s not count it out yet) it’s actually a disgusting look into the past.
These are all the terrible, terrible movies that bombed this decade.
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The live-action ones, at least.
1. ‘Green Lantern’
Yeah, I bet you’d like us to forget this movie now that you made Deadpool , wouldn’t you Mr. Reynolds? Well, here it is: the last time we’ll bring it up.
As one of the worst movies of the 2010s.
2. ‘Mars Needs Moms’
What in God’s name was this movie? Where did it come from?
While I have no idea what the answer to the ladder is, I know where it went: straight into the nearest movie executive’s trash bin!
3. ‘Ender’s Game’
So you have big successes like The Hunger Games and Twilight . Now Lionsgate needed a new golden goose to ride out the end of the decade.
This was not it. Not it at all.
4. ‘The Good Dinosaur’
This decade we got to see the unkillable Titan known as Pixar brought to its knees.
Hey, it was hit after hit, they were bound to go down at some point.
5. Pretty Much All DC Ensemble Movies
Shout out to Batman Vs. Superman , Justice League and Suicide Squad for all making this list.
Honestly DC, better luck in the 2020s. We’ve seen you do good stuff, so don’t F this decade up.
6. ‘Into The Woods’
They had the cast, they had the Disney money and they had to Broadway musical… they just didn’t have the audience.
Lord knows where they were, maybe off seeing some Marvel movie.
7. ‘Alexander & The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day’
Honestly, an expert like myself would blame the title for this movie’s bombing. People got bored of it by the time they got to the fifth word.
Keep it snappy, keep it happy, keep it…
8. ‘Need for Speed’
Here’s Jesse Pinkman (er, or, uh… what’s his name… Aaron Paul that’s it!) desperately trying to break into movies… and he chooses a video game movie? One that rips off Fast and Furious ?
Jeez, buddy.
9. ‘The Lone Ranger’
Mmm yes, there’s nothing better than when a remake fails.
There’s a very cynical group of people out there who wish every remake would fail as hard as The Lone Ranger .
10. ‘John Carter’
Wah-wah.
The biggest flop of the decade and one of the biggest of all time, this desperate attempt to capitalize on Avatar’s popularity was seen as a pretty pathetic move by Disney.
11. ‘The Nutcracker & The Four Realms’
Who thought this was a good idea? Huh?
Who not only decided to make a Nutcracker movie, but then decided to overload it with CGI and uninteresting dance routines?
Who was it?
12. ‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’
Disney wanted something like Harry Potter so bad.
All they really had to do was wait a couple of years because soon they’d have a franchise even bigger than ol’ HP.
13. ‘A Wrinkle In Time’
So, you wanted it so bad didn’t you Disney? You wanted this movie to work so hard you even brought in Oprah, hoping her legions of raving fans would storm the theatres.
They didn’t.
14. ‘Charlie’s Angels’
Do I take some sadistic pleasure in this movie bombing? Maybe.
In a world of reboots, remakes, and reimaginings, it’s nice to see when one of these soulless cash grabs, grabs no cash.
