If you’re anything like me, you studied every romantic comedy like it was a bible and then subsequently failed miserably at dating for the rest of your life.
That’s because unfortunately, rom-coms gave us some really, really bad advice, and tried to sell it as not only plausible but something we should expect.
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We had to learn the hard way that life isn’t like the movies. But hindsight is 20/20, amirite?
If a guy is mean to you, it’s because he likes you.
Ironically, through the entire film, He’s Just Not That Into You , the main character is preaching about how women are taught that if a boy picks on you, it’s because he has a crush on you, and how we need to reverse this way of thinking.
But she ultimately ends up with the guy who was rude to her…
There is a very fine line between flirting and sexual harassment.
Just to be clear, there is not a fine line. There is a bold, thick, defined line between flirting and sexual harassment.
But movies like The Ugly Truth and Bridget Jones’s Diary both insinuated that groping someone is a perfectly normal way to let somebody know that you’re interested in them.
All’s fair in love and war.
If there is one thing I took away from movies like Just Go With It, John Tucker Must Die, The Wedding Planner, Something Borrowed, Bride Wars , and 27 Dresses , it’s that if it’s in the name of love, anything goes.
In reality, however, this is obviously not the case.
Tricking someone into sleeping with you is totally acceptable.
In TV rom-coms like New Girl , and How I Met Your Mother , characters lied about their identities in an effort to get someone to sleep with them.
Needless to say, doing this in real life would make you very creepy.
Light stalking and spying is romantic.
In movies like There’s Something About Mary , American Pie , and The Girl Next Door , they make it seem totally acceptable to lurk on somebody while they’re changing or follow them around without their knowledge.
But I think we all know that that is not okay.
They love you, they just haven’t realized it yet.
If you profess your love to someone and they turn you down, there is a fairly good chance that they are simply not interested.
They’re not secretly asking you to try harder, like in 500 Days Of Summer or He’s Just Not That Into You .
You need to be married by a certain age.
In What’s Your Number? , and The Last Holiday , we’re given the impression that there is some kind of unspoken due date for everyone to have met the love of their life and settled down.
But in reality, like Phil Collins said, “you can’t hurry love!”
A dramatic makeover will make someone like you.
In She’s All That , The DUFF , and Grease , they implied that a significant makeover is going to change your entire life and definitely catch the eye of a possible love interest who wouldn’t have given you the time of day otherwise.
You should always forgive your significant other if they come through at the last minute with a grand, romantic gesture.
In How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days , She’s All That , and 10 Things I Hate About You , the male lead does something that would (in most cases IRL) result in a permanent breakup.
But these movies gave everyone the impression that if someone makes a giant, carefully planned, showy apology, then they should be forgiven immediately.
Being friends with benefits always leads to a relationship.
Friends With Benefits and No Strings Attached taught us that if you start having a solely physical relationship with someone, it will eventually become romantic.
While that may be an ideal situation for many of us, it is hardly ever the case.
Opposites attract.
Sometimes it’s true, opposites do attract.
But there is a likely chance that the person who has completely opposite values and opinions than you is not your perfect match, unlike what we were shown in_The Ugly Truth, The Proposal, Bridget Jones’s Diary_, and Along Came Polly .
Straight men and women are incapable of being friends without eventually having sexual relations and/or falling in love.
In When Harry Met Sally , a notable line mentions that sex will always get in the way of straight men and women being friends.
Basically stating that sex between two straight, single people is inevitable.
That men and women are fundamentally different when it comes to how they think in relationships.
Movies like Hitch and Think Like A Man try to sell the old concept that “men are from Mars and women are from Venus.”
But it’s 2020, and we know damn well that gender roles are no longer a thing.
You should always declare your feelings to someone, no matter who it hurts.
Crashing somebody’s wedding and objecting right before they say “I do” to declare your love isn’t cool, like what happened in Love Actually and the first episode of Happy Endings .
You had all the time in the world to tell that person how you feel, don’t do it at their wedding — or really, anytime after someone gets engaged.
You’re probably in love with your best friend.
13 Going On 30 taught us that there is something deeply romantic about realizing that your best friend of 15+ years is actually your soulmate. But I’d say that in most cases, that just isn’t true.
Sometimes best friends are just that: Best friends.
