45yro single father of 3, one of whom is trans, faces family drama at sister’s wedding
Family tensions run high as a father storms out of his sister’s wedding after she deadnames his trans son.
Father leaves sister’s wedding after she deadnames his trans son in a well organized ceremony
Father refuses to attend wedding after sister refuses to respect his trans son’s identity
Family drama intensifies as father storms out after sister deadnames his trans son at the reception.
A father stands up for his trans son and leaves his sister’s wedding after she deadnames him, calling her a bigot in the process
A father stands up for his trans son at a family wedding and storms out after the sister refuses to respect the name.
I’m a 45 year old single father of three, with a 17 year old son Andrew, 15 year old trans son Connor and 14 year old son Max. Connor has been out as trans for 5 years, and his family has known for 2. Recently, his sister got married, and the father was surprised to find out that she expected Connor to wear a dress instead of a shirt and tie like the rest of the male guests. He was even more surprised when he saw that the card at the table was marked with Connor’s deadname. After telling his sister not to deadname his son, the father found himself in an argument and left the wedding with his sons. It’s a story of standing up for one’s family, and it’s time to hear the reactions of the online community .
Sister NTA OP
OP was praised for standing up to their sister, who had deadnamed their trans son, and was called an a**hole for suggesting they could be a man any other day. Replies showed further support for OP and their son, with one reply suggesting the sister could try being a human being instead.
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NTA for standing up for his child!
The original poster (OP) is not the a**hole for standing up for their trans son after their sister deadnames him at her wedding. They suggest a long con idea of continuing to call her by her pre-married name Smith. Replies suggest a witty and clever response to the situation.
NTA ✊ Respect your kid!
The comment acknowledges that the father did the right thing by standing up for his trans son and demanding respect from his sister. The replies provide insight into what transitioning is and how the father’s support is essential. “You don’t need to understand how transitioning works or even why people do it. As long as you respect it and realize it doesn’t affect your day to day life, you’re good.”
Father stands up for son
The comment praised the father for standing up for his kid, deeming him a wonderful parent and NTA (not the a**hole). Replies to the comment agreed, stating “Good job, Dad! NTA” and “What they said.. totally agree.”
NTA: Standing up for your son!
The commenter states that they are “Not The A**hole” and praises the original poster for standing up for their trans son, while noting that their family is the a**holes. A reply concurs, also noting that it is acceptable to ruin a bigot’s big day.
NTA: Respect the or expect the
The comment condemns the sister for disrespecting OP’s trans son’s identity, and the replies agree that OP did the right thing by storming out of the wedding. Bigotry and entitlement are highlighted as the main issues, as the sister was willing to misgender the son using ‘they’ when it suited her.
Hero dad defends trans son
The commenter is proud of the dad for protecting his child and believes the sister is not indifferent but actively a transphobe for repeatedly using the deadname. They suggest cutting her out of the family. The replies agree, feeling like the dress code was chosen specifically to make this an issue.
A dad defends his trans son
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The comment recounts a story of the commenter’s mother trying to force them to wear a dress to a funeral, to which they replied with a cheeky caption. The replies offer a reminder that it’s cool for a man to wear a dress, and express surprise at the situation.
Supporting trans kids ❤️
The comment acknowledges awards given and emphasizes the importance of keeping trans kids alive. Replies highlighted the statistic that transgender kids with supportive parents have a lower suicide rate than cisgender kids, and the importance of understanding and acceptance.
Standing up for trans rights!
NTA, the commenter found the father’s actions admirable and encouraging. Comment replies include messages of support and understanding from other parents of trans children.
Father stands up for ️ trans son
The comment applauds the father for standing up for his trans son, and the reply commends the father for setting an example for other dads. No a-hole here!
NTA: Dad stands up for trans son’s rights
The commentor praises the dad for standing up for his trans son’s rights and argues that the bride is the one to blame for allowing her bigotry to dictate her decisions. It should not have been hard for her to label the card with the son’s name and accept that he’ll be wearing a suit and tie.
Parenting at its best
The comment applauds the father for standing up for his trans son by leaving his sister’s wedding. It emphasizes the importance of parental love and support for trans kids, which can sometimes mean the difference between life and death.
Father stands up for trans son!
The commenter was in favor of the father’s behavior, saying “NTA Good for you for having your son’s back and modeling good behavior for all of your kids.”
NTA: Fed up with hate
The commenter is Not The A**hole and expresses their frustration with organized religion and their sister’s selfish attitude towards her brother’s trans identity.
Defend your trans kid
NTA. The commenter advises to defend trans kids from microaggressions, as it can potentially save their lives. A reply to the comment jokes that the microaggression in this case was not very ‘micro’.
Defending yourself? NTA!
The original poster (OP) wasn’t starting a fight but rather defending themselves and trying to remove themselves from the situation. The comment replies argued that OP had the best approach for the situation and that anyone who accused them of causing a scene should be “getting an earful”. “Put the blame where it belongs” the replies concluded, “or see how difficult I can make things for you all a-holes.”
Dad stands up
NTA: Dad is praised for standing up for his trans son by deadnaming him at the wedding. No replies found.
NTA: Supporting kids is always right!
The comment said ‘NTA. Your sister used her wedding as an excuse for bigoted, hateful behavior. You did right in supporting your kids!’ The sentiment of the comment was that the father was not the a**hole for standing up for his trans son and was supporting his kids in the right way.
Dad stands up for trans son!
The commenter, marked NTA, was in support of the father’s decision to storm out of his sister’s wedding after she deadnamed his trans son. The replies echoed this sentiment and praised the father for being a great dad and standing up for his son’s rights.
NTA: It would have been free to be kind.
The commentor thought it would have cost the sister nothing to be kind to her nephew. They also mentioned that they would have reacted more harshly than the original poster. The commentor asked how the son handled the situation, and the reply said the son was a bit sad but they talked it out and are going to a family pride event in two days.
NTA for standing up for your son!
The commenter declared that they were “NTA” (not the a**hole) for standing up to their transphobic sister and expressed their support for the father who had stormed out of the wedding.
Father stands up for trans son!
The comment praised the father for standing up for his trans son and reminded readers to never say someone’s “deadname”. The reply acknowledged the mistake and apologized for it.
NTA: ♂️ A family’s wedding day ruined
The commenter was not the a**hole in this situation, as they felt the sister should have behaved decently and not ruined her own wedding day.
Father supports trans son
The commenter expressed support for the father’s decision to storm out of the wedding, stating that if the same situation happened to their own trans child, they would have thrown a drink on the sister.
Family drama: NTA ♂️
The commenter hopes that the sister was ‘ruined’ for deadnaming the trans son, and states that the father is Not The A-hole in this situation.
Father’s unexpected reaction
The comment suggests that the father had told the sister beforehand that his trans son would be attending the wedding in his true identity, and that the father was not the a**hole (NTA) for reacting the way he did at the event.
Supportive Dad
Commenter praises the dad for standing up for his son and wishes their own dad was as supportive when they came out. One reply encourages the commenter to forgive their dad.
Dad stands up for son
The comment praises the dad for standing up for his trans son against his sister’s transphobia. The comment calls out the sister’s attitude as ‘hateful’ and ‘discriminatory’. It also expresses hope that the sister will ‘mature enough to accept people the way they truly are and respect their choices’.
Dad shows love for trans son
The comment applauds the father for standing up for his family and shows respect for trans people despite lack of understanding. In the replies, crucial information is provided on the meaning of deadnaming, misgendering and how to show compassion to trans people, without judgement.
A trans man’s NTA
The comment praises the father for being a great parent and declares him ‘Not The A**hole’ (NTA).
NTA: Dad stands up for trans son!
The comment applauds the father for standing up for his trans son and refutes the sister’s incorrect statement that he can be a guy “another day”.
NTA: Supporting a trans son
The comment applauds the father for being supportive of his trans son, despite not receiving any support from either parent. The reply expresses sympathy for the commenter’s lack of support.
Father stands up for son
Father’s trans son was deadnamed at the sister’s wedding, so he stormed out in protest. Comment replies agree that the conservative need to victimize themselves to survive. NTA. ESH.
A parent’s love
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The comment praises the parent for being a dream parent for queer kids, with the reply thanking them for their support.
Father stands for his trans son!
The comment applauds the father for standing up for his son. The replies agree and explain why the father should not be downvoted for misunderstanding the gender of his son.
NTA: Honor your son’s identity
The commenter says ‘NTA’ (not the a**hole) and emphasizes the importance of respecting one’s son’s identity above all else. The commenter advocates for the recognition of trans men as real men.
Father defends Trans son
The commentor is NTA for defending the son against his sister’s transphobia. They suggest not revealing the son’s deadname to the internet, as it may cause dysphoria or be used against him. The commentor recommends educating the sister, but if she doesn’t listen, then she doesn’t deserve anything.”
NTA: Standing up for trans rights
The comment praises the father for standing up for his trans son and claims that it will be life changing for him. No replies were found.
Praising a great parent!
The comment praises the parent for their support of their trans son, labeling them as ‘Not The A**hole’ (NTA).
Dad stands up for his trans son!
The commenter applauded the dad for standing up for his trans son and declared him NTA (not the a**hole).
Family drama!
The original commenter criticizes a sister for deadnaming her trans brother at her own wedding and not having a private conversation about it in advance. They assert that it’s none of her business and that the commenter should never apologize for standing up for their son.
Pathetic!
The commenter is appalled by the sister’s behavior in deadnaming her trans son at her own wedding. They deem her actions as “pathetic” and state that she was making a “stupid, half-baked ‘political’ point” at the expense of her brother’s child. They conclude by saying that the sister is “Not The A**hole.”
OP stands up✊
OP is 1000% NTA for standing up for their son after their sister deadnamed them at her wedding. OP warned her of the consequences and stuck to their word, while also wishing to have no contact with their bigoted sister.
Father defends his son’s right to transition
The comment defends the father’s right to support his 10 year old son’s right to transition. It suggests that the sister was not necessarily an a**hole, but rather disagreed with the decision to transition at such a young age. Replies explain that social transitioning causes no lasting physical effects, and that some people know they are trans at a young age.
NTA: wedding drama
The commenter declares that the sister is ‘NTA’ (not the a**hole) for deadnaming her trans brother at her wedding, as the commenter implies she was aware of the consequences of her actions.
NTA
The comment praised the father for his support of his trans son, declaring that he was not the a**hole (NTA).
Good Parenting
The comment praises the parent for being a good parent to their trans son, saying ‘NTA, thank you for being a good parent.’
A wedding ruined by deadnaming
The comment defends the father for standing up for his trans son after the sister deadnamed him, claiming that the sister was the one who caused the scene and knowingly stirred up the pot.
An amazing dad!
The comment praised the father for his actions, saying ‘NTA. You are an amazing dad.’
