There is fine dining with white linens and candles and real silver, and then there is the kind of food that would be home atop a garbage lid and served amongst cigarette butts floating in beer.
It shouldn’t take you long to decide to which category the following 16 images belong.
Still, there’s a place in our hearts for food that we know is straight-up trash. Although, that could just be heartburn.
Anyhoo, you decide.
1. Fruity Pebbles soaked in…water?
Sure, the “pebbles” in the name might make you think this fruit-flavored breakfast cereal should be served beside a stream. But that doesn’t mean they should be dunked in it.
2. When low carb has gone too far.
Yes indeed, what we have here are hot dogs served in cucumber “buns.” Nothing about this looks even remotely appetizing or appropriate for polite company.
3. Wasn’t this in a scene from Saw?
Instagram won’t allow nudity within their hallowed app, but this is acceptable? This looks like an autopsy gone horribly wrong. Oddly though, I’m now craving KFC while watching Winnie the Pooh .
4. Sooooo, those are not seeds.
See, raspberry seeds are very small. And those “specks” floating at the top of these preserves are rather large. I’ll leave it to your imagination as to what they might be. Hey, added protein!
5. Just a dash of pepper.
Oh, I’m sorry. Did you say, “dash”? See, I heard “dish of pepper.” My mistake. I’m sure it’ll be fine. Or at the very least, it won’t be bland!
6. These Hot Pockets are as dark as your soul.
And considering you’re voluntarily preparing and eating Hot Pockets, my guess is that your soul is a very dark place indeed.
7. Are you supposed to eat these together?
Yogurt Cola sounds like the. Worst. Flavor. Ever. But given enough alcohol and bad days in a row, I’m not saying I’d turn them down.
8. That “tomato” looks oddly artificial.
It’s not like anyone’s grabbing a burger from a fast-food joint for health reasons, but still, “plastic” definitely doesn’t fall into any of the food groups.
9. This is not the first time I’ve seen “toothpaste toast.”
And I have questions. Many, many questions. Do y’all just hate brushing your teeth? Really enjoy the taste of fresh mint? Or, my initial reaction, are you just drunk AF?
10. Hmm… That is not a grape stem.
Also, I think I’mma take a hard pass on eating grapes ever, ever, ever again. Maybe I’ll just play it safe and forgo all fruit entirely.
11. There’s this new contraption called a “microwave.”
If you’re staying at a hotel without a microwave in your room and your only recourse is to heat your beans with a hairdryer, maybe stop staying at Motel 6.
12. Calm down! It’s not really a finger!
It’s just some raw pretzel dough that looks like a finger! There, don’t you feel all better now?! Put some nacho cheese dip on this, and you won’t even think you’re eating a thumb!
13. “Who ordered the mint, chocolate, broccoli, and pineapple pizza? Anyone?”
Not a single person would answer that question because there isn’t anyone who would want to admit to creating that monstrosity.
14. I feel like this package should really have some fine print that says, “Not as advertised.”
I guess you shouldn’t complain when it’s something that comes from a vending machine.
15. Remember Fyre Festival and the meal that was provided during the luxury music event?
If this is luxury, then I am very okay with living my cost-efficient peasant lifestyle.
16. Hey, Starbucks, maybe you would sell more egg bites if you didn’t display the ones with mold on them. Just a tip.
Not sure who was in charge of swapping out the old display food items, but they have most likely been fired.
17. When I said I wanted a crunchy texture added to my hot dog, I definitely did not mean Froot Loops.
And that Italian spin I requested was absolutely not referring to SpaghettiOs. Start over.
18. This chicken sandwich would have been a lot tastier if Chick-fil-A had remembered the main ingredient.
Maybe it was a trainee who made it and learning about the importance of chicken was part of the next lesson.
19. Okay, the first rule of ordering an ice cream sandwich is making sure the person you’re ordering it from knows what you’re talking about.
If bread is even anywhere in the vicinity, you’re doing it wrong.
20. Feast (LOL, get it?) your eyes on the diner version of calamari on pasta.
Yes. Yes, that hot dog is supposed to look like an octopus. Why? Well, that is an answer I just don’t have.
21. Put the Kraft Singles down, and step away from the package.
Pretty sure a 5-year-old broke into the pantry and fridge and dumped this concoction into a bowl while mom was watching Ellen.
22. Ah, yes, that culinary expert, the “Mitchell Man.”
So, I’m guessing this lucky gal meant “Michelin,” but regardless, I don’t think reheated frozen chicken cutlets count as five-star dining. I mean, come on, there’s not even any BBQ sauce.
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23. If you like rubbery, frozen hardboiled eggs, have a I got a picture for you.
Although, if you do like rubbery, frozen hardboiled eggs, you’re seriously weird, bruh, and should think about getting professional help.
24. Are you supposed to eat those garlic cloves whole?
If so, why? Are you trying to repel vampires? In fact, is this side of garlic fries just marketed as vampire repellent? Because that would make a whole lot more sense.
