Now, I’m not the most fashion-forward person in the world. It’s probably safe to say that my sense of fashion settled in college and never really progressed after that. What can I say? It’s comfortable and fits in my budget.
So it takes a pretty far-out fashion trend to get my attention and, well, ankle scarves did it for me. They are, in a word, weird — weird enough that nobody could have predicted them, and with good reason.
Showing off your ankles has become fashionable somehow.
You know how back in Victorian times showing bare ankles might be considered scandalous? Well, you know those days are done and gone when fashion demands that only your ankles be bare. But that looks cold, doesn’t it?
And we all know that one person who just refuses to acknowledge winter and let cold weather tell them what they should and shouldn’t wear.
Okay, maybe it’s a bit much to suggest that shorts should be everyday gear when the flurries start to fly, but you’d think those ankle-showers would at least consider a pair of socks, right?
Well, according to Italian publication Lercio, the answer isn’t socks, but ankle scarves.
Yes. Scarves. For your ankles.
I mean, I know Italy has a great reputation for pushing the fashion envelope and all, but ankle scarves? Maybe it’s a thing for specifically Mediterranean winters?
We weren’t able to find any scarves specifically designed for ankle wear on sale, so maybe they just wrap kids’ scarves around their ankles?
But, to be honest, from the sounds of Lercio’s rundown of this so-called trend, you have to wonder if they’re just having us on.
According to Google Translate , they suggest it’s a hipster-driven trend, but their description raises some doubts.
For one thing, they quote a “well-known DJ in his bedroom and Little Tony record collector” as an expert.
Apparently he says that for hipsters, “Long pants bring them only grandmothers and grandparents, uncle! But after twice I had chilblains my doctor warned me that I could lose my ankles, risking not being able to go to Starbucks to feet. Fortunately, the fashion of the ankle scarves has exploded, so I can keep them warm and at the same time be fashionable.”
Even if that’s just a bad translation by Google’s AI — and it sure doesn’t look great — that has to be satire, right?
The article even goes on to say “The ankle scarves market is booming, the various models, often hand-crafted by African children, are sold on e-commerce platforms. Undoubtedly their practicality and versatility: with the change of season and the arrival of the heat you just have to remove them and you are ready for summer.”
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No surprise, folks online are rightly skeptical of ankle scarves’ actual practicality.
This guy is right: wrapping a scarf around your ankle would be a tripping hazard.
So yeah, not many folks can get behind this fashion idea.
And it turns out that, yes, this is all definitely made-up for fun.
Der Postillon, a German publication known for running satirical articles, also ran its own version of an ankle scarves article. However, it “quoted” someone named Dennis Krupski with some slightly different text: “Long trousers are worn only by grandmothers and grandpas. But I’ve had chilblains twice this year and my doctor warned me I could lose my ankles, I’ll just wear those shawls for safety’s sake.”
So, unless you’re somehow convinced that the satirical idea of fashionable scarves for your fashionable ankles is a good one, it’s best to just laugh and move on.
Or, if you’re into knitting, maybe working up a pair of stylish ankle scarves could be a fun gag gift for your hipster friends?
Otherwise, keep on rocking whatever look works for you this winter!
