I spend a lot of my time going through the internet finding weird pictures to show all of you, my loyal readers. Sometimes, it makes me feel like that slightly older kid who doesn’t talk much but sometimes brings you into the forest to look at a dead body they found. I’m not complaining, I like the attention.
1. We’ll start off gentle with this picture of a door that is somewhere doors don’t go.
What an a-door-able mistake. But seriously, if anyone wants to let me know what’s going on here, feel absolutely free.
2. Finally! Now I don’t have to stab all those Oreos myself.
I’ve heard that there’s this new “twisting” technique to get into Oreos, but I don’t trust that holistic hippie nonsense.
3. Why does this guy have a look on his face like he’s opening up his trenchcoat to sell me a stolen watch?
Hey kid, uh, you…uh, wanna buy a pizza?
4. This is the honest-to-goodness mascot for the burn ward at a hospital in Brazil.
Apparently he teaches kids about fire safety, which, frankly, seems like something that can wait until the kids are out of recovery.
5. When you just got your upholstery cleaned and you know your sloppy self is going to get chicken nugget crumbs all over it again.
Real talk, this is actually how they drove the car in Baby Driver so they could film the interior car scenes. So if you see one of these cruising around, it’s probably not a Transformers uprising.
6. So this is why Thomas the Tank Engine & Friendsdon’t have realistic faces.
The shirt says “YES!” but we’re all screaming “Nooooooooooo!!!!!” I’m just waiting for the Black Mirror episode where someone does a faceswap and it gets stuck that way.
7. This picture got a little bit…kinky.
Apparently this is what happens when your hair gets caught in a zipper. Or when your hair gets really into steampunk and is going for a whole gear-based aesthetic.
8. It’s a good thing he’s got six other shirts exactly like this.
I hope he can get home without experiencing a tragic accident where somebody mistakes him for a real ball and dunks him.
9. It’s a bit of a trade secret among real estate agents that having a Drake nook on a property, or at least the space for one, will raise its value by about $2,500.
10. Could this be the time-traveling reboot episode of Xena: Warrior Princess we’ve all been waiting for?
Man, remember Xena ? 1998 was a peak year for entertainment. Hercules and Xena were on TV, Buck Bumble was killing it on the N64. What a time to be alive.
11. I’d like to find whoever made this and shake their hand.
If any one of you tries to tell me this is fake, I will have no choice but stick my fingers in my ears and pretend that I can’t hear you.
12. Women from all over are finding incredible rejuvenation from dipping Guy Fawkes masks into lava and strapping it to their faces.
I’m told that this is actually an anti-aging LED treatment. So yeah, pretty much on par with that lava thing, most likely.
13. I don’t know whether I should kiss whoever made this or ask Adobe to ban them from Photoshop.
All I know for sure is this dragon looks absolutely Fieri-ous that the warrior is trying to steal its burgers.
14. You’ve heard of Samurai Jack? Well how about Samurai Mac?
I don’t understand how someone even has this idea in the first place, let alone executes it to as high a level as this person did.
15. *extreme Mortal Kombat voice*: Garnish Him!
You’ll be glad to know that including this picture led to a very heated debate with our editorial department about whether or not sexy tomato men are too sexy for a family-friendly site like this.
16. There’s all this talk of people’s ability to bear arms, but the real debate is why this bare bear has no arms.
More than anything, I’m concerned about the anger problems of the child who tried to tear this bear apart and ended up discovering this abomination.
17. Some dinosaurs were just destined to become extinct.
Paleontologists have discovered that this is exactly what dinosaurs looked like when they felt someone breathing on the backs of their necks.
18. Getting all shreddy on my s’ketti.
Yeah, that’s not a great joke, but you try coming up with a funny pasta/skateboarding pun. That’s what the comment section of Facebook is for — telling writers what they got wrong and how you could do better.
19. Of all of the celebrity gossip stories out there about the Kardashians, it’s kind of amazing that no one has discovered until now that Kim and Kanye share an Avatar-inspired love by connecting their charging cables, like some kind of bougie Na’vi power couple.
20. Well folks, we’ve finally made it to the season finale of the internet.
Because, quite frankly, it doesn’t get any better than this. Except maybe the next four pics, because we’ve still got more to go!
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21. This is exactly what it feels like for a straight guy meeting his girlfriend’s friends for the first time.
Dozens of unblinking eyes, staring at you, judging you, all belonging to someone probably named Emily.
22. He’s got the whooooole world, in his cheese.
Someone on Reddit pointed out that, yeah, it’s neat that this cheese looks like an Australia-less map of the world, but it’s much more curious that someone brought an entire block of cheese as a snack to a shooting range.
23. After sales of furniture dropped, Ikea found they needed to branch into new kinds of products, namely fashion.
These are called Untergarment (add umlauts and stuff as you see fit) and they only take about 3 hours to put together.
24. I’m real glad that’s an “in” cup and not an “out” cup.
Just for an extra plot twist, I like to imagine that it’s a special alcoholic soup. Man, that sounds like a great idea. If anyone has A) the money to back it, and B) any idea how to make boozy soup, I’m asking for 60–70% of the profits, tops.
