People often give physics a hard rap, and that’s because they’re fraudulent hacks monopolizing on the grief and fears of everyday people, but let’s park that for now.
The real fortune tellers aren’t to be found in tents at carnivals with crystal balls, but rather roaming with wild abandon across the planes of the Twitterverse. And, in honor of these people with the true gift of foresight, here are 15+ people who really can see the future!
Always Young At Heart
No matter how old you get, firing a bit of paper out of a straw at someone will never not be funny, and if you disagree with that fact, then I pity you.
Dystopian Futures
Yup, it is official folks, we are now living in the dystopian future you feared would never come true. Except, we don’t have the cool jetpacks or hover cars, just the oppressive governmental surveillance and control.
Are The Robots Still Screaming Clarice?
If there is anyone out there reading this who has never heard the sound of an old dialup tone, then I don’t think that I will ever be able to find a better description than, “Robots screaming”.
Stealing Someone’s Catchphrase
When you spend an incredible amount of time with someone this sort of thing is incredible. For instance, I know for a fact that my partner is going to say, “I don’t mind,” whenever any question about food or activities is brought up, and then I’m going to sigh.
The Future Is Bright
The future can seem uncertain and scary at times, however, it is moments of clarity such as these that we take our solace.
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Actually, The Future Is Not So Bright…
Wow, they really had us in the first half there! Ah, there’s nothing like the crushing reality of the price of housing to give us a good laugh from time to time!
“One benefit of a global pandemic.”
As the world sees governments across the globe begin planning to roll out working from home orders in the wake of the coronavirus spread, it’s only natural to try and look on the bright side.
2074 Is The New 1984
2074 seems a little far ahead for this kind of thing to become a reality. I’d guess it happening more around the 2040 mark!
Airplane Mode… Activate!
Look, everyone would think that it would turn into a flying machine, let’s just get that out of way, and I for one am still annoyed that my computer can’t transform into a flying contraption! And I’m allowed to be disappointed by that!
Late 20s Are The New Late 40s
The fact that this person’s profile image is an Animal Crossing character asleep is absolutely perfect. That is the kind of energy I like to radiate these days!
Netflix Or Die
I think you may need one other category for, “Standup special no one asked for and is bang average for 40 minutes then really takes a nose dive towards the end”.
Big Mood Indeed
And, with that final Juul rip, their body turns into one giant vape cloud, and their vaporized remains are inhaled by the young.
Self Explanatory
I mean, it does feel a bit like asking for trouble. It’s kind of like wondering why you keep getting pulled over while you’re wearing a, “Definitely not a meth dealer” t shirt.
The Future Of Websites
I can see this being a smash hit! If this person hasn’t yet set this up, then I’m off to secure the domain name!
The Summer Struggle
It takes so long for me to actually find shorts that I like, and I’m only really going to wear them for about one week on holiday, so I wish that I could just have one pair that will always fit no matter what. Alas, it is not to be.
The Child Has A Gift
This child has age and wisdom beyond his years. This is an important lesson to that child about the importance of getting a job that you actually like, it really makes life easier!
Body For Sale
What with all of those high quality bodies out there, I do wonder what they’ll do with mine, just open it up and go, “Yup, this is exactly the mess we’d expect from someone who drinking far too much wine and eats too many crisps.”
We Have Food At Home!
Yeah, but I don’t want the perfectly nice and already purchased food at home, I want to spend too much on a burrito that is terrible for me and I don’t have the money for!
The Future Is Terrifying
Okay, so this one may not actually be that funny, but the potentially dangerous uses of this technology in the future is wildly unsettling!
No Plans
I mean, I act like I’m surprised by it, but I know that I’m going to drink a bottle of wine and order a white three-piece suit on ASOS because I’m an idiot.
