One of the most frequently-quoted lines from the classic Jurassic Park is Dr. Ian Malcolm’s warning that “Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
And while that was certainly the case in that movie, it can seem even more obvious in real life when we come across a product that simply has no reason to exist.
Some folks who have been around long enough to see it all might nod their heads at this statement when they recall someone buying a new iPhone model that’s barely different from the last one. However, they should know that someone out there is designing crap with them in mind as well.
After all, just think back to the last remake you saw that warped what you loved about the original movie beyond recognition.
Yeah, it turns out that those aren’t just limited to the entertainment industry.
Whether they’re trying to get in on the ground floor of a trend or trying to profit off the backlash to that trend, you’re not likely to run out of cases when someone is pushing something you don’t need.
Before we go any further, it’s worth noting that this doesn’t apply to the rotary cell phone we’re looking at right now.
That’s because this was a project that a YouTuber named Justine Haupt decided to undertake herself and didn’t think people would like as much as they did. It isn’t a product designed for mass consumption.
That said, it would be a perfect example of what we’re talking about if it was.
And while it seems that most companies are well aware that the impracticalities of rotary phones clash with the convenience of cell phones, that doesn’t mean some haven’t made similar attempts at more absurd ideas.
For instance, do you hate that your smartphone fits in your pocket and doesn’t require you to unhook it from a desktop setup to move it anywhere?
No? Well, someone better tell that to whoever made this office phone that apparently has app capabilities.
You can tell that when this was developed, the question “has anyone does this yet?” came up long before anybody asked, “Does anyone actually need this?”
And sure, several decades of shoddy As Seen On TV products make it clear this is a battle we’ve fought and lost a long time ago. But when it happens in tech, it’s basically an automatic excuse to make the results ridiculously overpriced.
And make no mistake, these companies wouldn’t keep coming up with these redundant ideas if they didn’t work.
For instance, do you remember playing with one of these toy phones and thinking that it would be a lot better if it worked as a real phone?
And if you answered yes to that, did you imagine it not actually functioning on its own and needing an existing smartphone to make calls?
No? Well, that apparently didn’t stop it from selling so well that it’s actually out on stock on the maker’s website at the time of this writing.
Much like the NES and SNES classic editions that Nintendo released a few years ago, it didn’t let the fact that it can be easily replaced by something from a yard sale stand in the way of its success.
And I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that the second something becomes popular, a sea of unnecessary tie-in products will immediately rush out of the floodgates.
And before you ask, this isn’t just a branded chess set capitalizing on the way The Queen’s Gambit reignited viewers’ interest in the game. No, that might actually make sense and describe something people wanted.
Instead, it’s an entirely new board game with drab tokens and some cards with Anya Taylor-Joy’s face on them that someone expects me to pay $40 for.
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And sure, since nobody was clamoring for this, it’s not likely that too many people will buy it. But you never know when you’ll be tempted to buy something equally pointless.
And it’s important to resist that urge because otherwise, they’ll just be encouraged to repackage other useless junk and try to charge more for them.
