Selling homes is a deceptively hard job.
Some homes sell themselves . But some are so horrible and so far beyond saving that it is next to impossible to showcase any good qualities that they might have.
That’s why real estate agent Laura Grimm Bailey didn’t even bother trying to sell anyone on the positive attributes of one of her listings. Instead, she gave it a proper roast on Facebook.
Here she is:
“INVESTORS and HANDYMEN! This almost 1800 sq ft , 3 bed 1 bath home, located in Keokuk, IA is a beautiful gem that caters to all walks of life!”
Alright! So far, so good!
Alright, so that’s not great.
“If you like the outdoors, then you will love the missing windows, allowing the cool breeze to flow naturally through the home, saving on energy bills!”
Who doesn’t love to save money?
As a horror fan, this DOES appeal to me.
“If you are a fan of horror flicks and the supernatural, you will love the creepy feel this home has with all the creaky boards, cold walls, and of course the haunted exterior look with broken siding, weeds growing into the home, and you will also save time scraping off the lead based paint, being half of it is already missing!”
Oh, someone is definitely getting murdered in that basement.
“If you like going to sleep listening to the sound of waves crashing, look no further! This basement comes equipped with plenty of leaks so in due time, you will only need to add the wave machine!”
No cooking happens in this kitchen.
“The open double entry staircase in this home leads to a kitchen that is suitable for the buyer who does not like to cook! The owner took the appliances and floor with them, but left behind a set of pots and pans in case you have a change of heart later.”
Oh, perfect for those who love to organize!
“If you think someone else’s trash is another person’s treasure, then bring your dumpster!! This owner was so excited about marketing this beauty, they hurried out and left all of their trash behind for you!”
Better get in those early morning appointments!
“Please make viewing appointments during daytime hours as the owner lived in the home with no utilities hooked up! In conclusion, if you are open to adventures, this is your perfect property!!”
Some of the comments were AMAZING.
“If you’ve ever wanted the aftermath of a great house party without having the actual party because you hate people then I have the house for you,” one read.
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The house is a viral sensation.
The sweet thing is that many of the post’s commenters see a lot of potential in the house, and so do I! It would take a lot of work, but I believe this house can be saved.
What do you think? Would you invest in this ultimate fixer-upper based on its winning listing description?
