Social boundaries can be strange things. What’s socially acceptable to one person might be shocking to another, and these standards can change depending on where you are or who you’re with.
We’re not going to be able to change what’s socially acceptable, but we can certainly talk about it! Let’s delve into the r/AskReddit thread, “What is considered socially acceptable for no reason?” .
Accepting what’s offered.
“This is mostly in the Middle East I think. But it’s really frustrating for foreigners because a foreigner will never know the correct time to accept an offer.
“If someone offers to buy you dinner, there is a very delicate balance of refusing and accepting. You have to refuse like 4-5 times. But if you refuse more than that, you’ll also offend the other person. But if you don’t refuse it several times adamantly, then you’ll look greedy and selfish. If they fail to offer it insistently for like 4-5 times, they’ll look like they didn’t mean the offer and they aren’t generous.”
Playing as an adult.
“Playing “Pretend” as an adult without kids involved. There is nothing wrong with an adult man building with legos and setting up an epic adventure with them that plays out in his head as something amazing. Its escapism and very calming even in adults its stimulates the mind to have a self made adventure where everything is what I want.”
Using a public restroom.
“Pooping in a public bathroom. It’s not necessarily ‘unacceptable’ but it’s something that always [elicits] a reaction of discomfort and often disapproval. I’ve definitely heard people loudly exclaim that they could tell someone just took a [expletive] in the bathroom acting all disgusted.”
Answering the front door.
“Not answering your own door. When there’s like a salesman at someone’s door, they won’t want to answer but they will act like no one is home, and be really quiet so the person outside the door doesn’t hear them. But it’s your house. I could just stare at a salesman out the window as he rings my bell, who cares. It’s my house. I don’t have to answer my own door, for whatever reason I deem acceptable. You came to my house, not the other way around.”
Being single.
“I find it liberating. Sure, sometimes it’s lonely, but I don’t have to deal with much drama and compromise and I can find and create fufilling relationships independent of romantic or sexual attraction. I don’t really have to answer to anyone else except myself. Our society pressures us to think we’ll be miserable alone, but it seems like the majority of people in relationships are forcing themselves to be together or be happy.”
Walking away.
“Leaving without giving an ‘acceptable’ song and dance about why you are leaving, with leaving because you have basically reached your limit with socializing being ‘not a good enough reason.’
“People who can stand to be around other people for huge amounts of time, more power to you, but me? I can’t do that, and I don’t want to have to make up an excuse to do so.”
Calling in sick.
“In some places, calling in sick, because it’s ‘letting down the team’ or whatever. [Expletive] off, I’m sick as a dog. There’s little I will accomplish other than feeling like death warmed up, so you aren’t missing out on much. Plus I could spread whatever I’ve got to coworkers, then we’re all sick.”
– u/GoabNZ
Staying up late.
“I stay up until 6 am and wake up at 2.
“I’m a self employed artist and I’m most productive at night. Even as a kid I always stayed up/slept in. People assume I’m lazy but I’m not productive AT ALL in the morning. So [expletive] that noise. Night owls ftw.”
Wearing what you want.
“There are a ton of rules around clothing that are completely arbitrary nonsense. And I don’t even just mean workplace dress codes and gendered clothing that are obvious [expletive]. Even in casual situations, jeans and a flannel shirt are normal, but if you wore plaid flannel pajama pants and a denim shirt, you would look psychotic.”
Having fun as an adult.
“Having fun as an adult. Fun has no expiration date, you don’t suddenly no longer qualify for fun and have to live a life of watching the news and drinking coffee. People shame adults for doing fun things and that’s absolute BS.”
Taking your cat for a walk.
“Totally agree. My cat loves being on his harness, but we don’t take him out as often as we could because people are weird about it. I’ve gotten a lot of side-eye from people walking their dogs, even when my cat is just on his harness in our yard.”
Discussing pay.
“I’ve talked about salary with coworkers a few times in my career. A couple times I found out I was underpaid. I asked for more money on my next review and was given what I asked.
“Sometimes companies overpay new hires when they’re desperate for somebody good. The worst thing that can happen is their best, most experienced, employees find out about it. Salary secrecy is always beneficial to the company, never to the employee.”
Wearing clothes for more than one day.
“I’m from the States and I visited Italy when I was a teenager. It was so weird to me at the time that people there wore the same clothes a few days in a row. But now I think, why not?! If the clothes aren’t dirty or smelly, they’re still good to wear.”
Men showing affection for one another.
“For years the most physical contact I’ve had with another male was a handshake. Then I met a group of guys that hug. Gamechanger. We unironically hug, say we love each other, talk about out problems and stresses. It’s actually the best thing in the world, makes you feel accepted and loved. 10/10 would recomend.”
Going to a movie alone.
“When I was abroad for a year I went to the cinema by myself all the time. You choose the movie and the time, no compromises. You don’t talk during the film anyways so there really is no need to drag someone along. Do it, it’s great.”
– u/Kizka
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Being honest about your feelings.
“Saying you’re not okay when someone asks how you’re doing. Like, I’m sorry my life is a mess and I decided to not lie for once, never again will I open up even the tiniest bit.”
Eating at your own pace.
“Eating something that’s totally possible in one bite. People like me take the most enjoyment out of eating something in one big bite, but other people say that I shouldn’t do it, and I should eat it in a lot of bites to take the most enjoyment out of it. Seriously, it’s not like I don’t enjoy the cake people, it’s just that I like it so much that I eat it really fast.”
Not having kids.
“Being open/honest about not having kids. In my personal life I have gotten more ridicule and very pointed questions bordering on disrespectful over being childfree than about any of my other opinions.
“Once I said I wasn’t having kids my family became obsessed with whether or not I was dating, and who, and oh, what if HE wants kids? What if I meet the ‘perfect’ guy, but he wants kids? Well, then I guess he’s not the perfect guy for me. Simple as that.”
Avoiding social media.
“Staying off social media. People act like you’re a psychopath and then have 100 questions because you don’t have Instagram or Facebook. I’m like maybe it’s so nosey people like you don’t have access to details about my life that I don’t want you to have.”
Dancing in public.
“Dancing in public- You’ll get some funny looks, and I’ve always thought it was kind of unfortunate because like, it’s a cool little thing people do when they’re happy, and it makes me feel nice to see it. I don’t see a problem with getting a little jiggy with it to yourself.”
