Body transformations, for many people, can be life-changing. Those who feel uncomfortable in their own skin and want to make changes usually put a lot of time and dedication towards doing so. Once they reach their goals, they want to celebrate their hard work and success — oftentimes by wearing things they may not have felt good in prior.
While they may feel good about this and their changes, there are others who can say things that make them regret their choices. It can lead to a crossroads of conflict in a person’s life.
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Recently, one woman opened up about her situation on Reddit, seeking advice
Reddit user not_here_for_long1 explained that she has spent the majority of her life being on the heavier side. Wanting to make a change, she got a personal trainer and started going to the gym five days a week. Over this time, she lost over 50 pounds and is “very proud” of her transformation.
She claims it is the “best shape” she has ever been in in her entire life.
This led to her first time purchase of a two-piece swimsuit
While shopping for a trip that she planned with her three best friends and families for the week of 4th of July, she decided to grab herself a bikini — her first ever two-piece bathing suit. She explained that she never had the self-confidence to wear a two-piece in the past, but with her new body and her new lease on her self-esteem, she decided to buy it.
She brought it on her trip
On their trip, along with their husbands and children, the Reddit user wore her bikini our on the lake and at the pool. She didn’t think anything of it, until one evening when she was sitting with her friends on the porch talking and one of them said, “you need to tone it down.”
At first, she didn’t know what they were walking about.
Then, they all ripped into her
All three of her friends began to rip into the Reddit user, saying that no one needs to “see her a** and tits.” They also claimed that her bikinis were making their husbands “uncomfortable” and that she should stop wearing them, basically. They asked her to “stop acting like a slut.”
The Reddit user was upset — she claimed she was caught off guard and got defensive.
She explained that her friends are on the heavier side, as she used to be
Unsure of what to do, she bounced back to her friends by saying they were just jealous of her new body and were upset because they were all in one-piece bathing suits and she wasn’t. She ended up storming off to her room and crying — not wanting to explain to anyone what was going on. The next day, she decided to wear a bikini anyway. However, she began to have second thoughts.
She was unsure if she was in the wrong, or if her friends were just being insecure about her new look.
Most people felt that the Reddit user’s friends were in the wrong here
“You have the right to wear whatever you feel comfortable in, regardless of your friends’ opinions. They shouldn’t be dictating what you wear based on their own insecurities. Their husbands are grown men who should be able to control themselves. If they’re feeling uncomfortable, that’s their issue, not yours,” wrote Cute_Soni.
Others said that they’re uncomfortable, not the husbands
Some people suggested that the husbands probably aren’t uncomfortable, but they feel insecure that their friend is walking around in a bikini around their husbands. They don’t want their husbands to look at their friend in a better light or a different way than they may look at their own wives.
Clearly, it is more of a “them” issue than it is about their husbands at all.
Some say the friends are a reminder of what they “could have”
“Your friend group is rejecting you for violating their unwritten rules. You’re a threat to them now that you’re conventionally attractive and psychologically you’re a constant reminder that they’re able to change just as you have- but they lack the willpower.
Nobody wants that reminder in front of them. They’re miserable. Branch out and add some normal women friends who don’t see you as part of a fat pact,” wrote RecognitionFit4871.
One person said she should put all of her friends on the spot, too
“During breakfast, bring it up the the entire group that it has been brought to your attention that your swimsuit is making everyone uncomfortable. Specifically mention that the wives have all indicated that the husbands are uncomfortable. Watch them squirm as the husbands get upset at their wives for making them sound like creeps,” suggested lordcommander55.
However, one Reddit user said she could “tone it down” just because of the kids there
auntynell commented that it may not be the popular opinion, but she would “tone down” her bathing suit choices if there were families and kids around, just to avoid conflict. Although, they did agree that her friends could have approached it in a more tasteful manner.
Do you think that the friends are wrong here?
H/T Reddit
