Many children pick up their habits and thoughts about themselves from their families and their parents at home. Parents sometimes neglect to realize how much power their words and actions have on their children.
Some parents say things that create poor habits for their kids.
Some parents say things or implement rules that make it hard for kids and create poor self-esteem in their own children.
One dad recently wrote into Reddit about his daughter and her weight.
The father, who feels his daughter is a bit overweight, asked Reddit if he was wrong for his actions on her birthday.
The dad shared his daughter is overweight and said she, “could lose a few pounds.”
“My daughter is overweight. Not anything too drastic, but she is around 5’4 and 155 pounds. So she could stand to lose a few pounds.
I’ve been concerned about her weight for a long time. None of it has been helped by my also-overweight, enabling wife,” he wrote.
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He shared they went on a hike for her birthday.
“On her 19th birthday, in August, we went on a hike in the state forest. She complained about it literally the entire time. She didn’t like that it was hot, she didn’t like the incline, she didn’t like the mosquitoes.
I still encouraged her and pushed on, I think she was satisfied with having exercised at the end of it,” he said.
On the way home, she wanted to stop and get a birthday donut.
“She wanted me to stop so she could get herself a ‘birthday donut’ I said no.
She was upset about it, saying she just wanted a donut and she’d just done this long hike to please me on her birthday. I argued calmly that she didn’t want to undo all the work of the hike by getting a donut,” he added.
The dad refused to stop for the donut and his wife was not thrilled with his choice.
“I pointed out she’d probably be eating cake later. We didn’t stop and she sulked about it on the whole ride back.
When we got home, she told her mother, who of course sided with her and went on a rant about how our daughter’s birthday shouldn’t be a time I’m preaching healthy eating,” he continued.
The dad asked if he was wrong for his reaction to his daughter.
Many people on Reddit said, yes, this dad is an asshole.
“On her birthday, you forced your daughter into an activity I suspect you knew she would not enjoy, and then denied her a 75 cent treat. Beyond that, you didn’t even pretend you took the hike for time together, or– God forbid– her enjoyment; you made it clear that your focus for this event was getting her to exercise.
You’re a huge asshole,” one person said.
Others said he’s going about this all wrong.
” he didn’t get to her current weight by having a damn donut once a year on her birthday. Why not teach her treats are okay for special occasions but her regular everyday diet should be healthy? Or encourage her to eat a healthy meal before having a treat/dessert for her birthday or any day. Teach her portion sizes and colorful plates. You’d probably get a lot further teaching her instead of controlling her,” another said.
One person with an eating disorder even commented and chimed in.
“A huge asshole. As someone who had an [eating disorder] for 10 years, I can tell you that when my parents put me on calorie restrictions and told me I couldn’t eat certain things…. it made it way worse. 5’4 and 155 is not something to be “greatly” concerned about… that’s barely overweight and as long as she isn’t just eating junk food who cares? Also, it was her birthday, you’re a double asshole. How about you stop focusing on your daughter’s body so much like it’s the only indicator of health. Oh, and you’re also not ‘preaching healthy eating’ you are preaching being skinny,” they said.
Do you agree, is this dad in the wrong?
