Thanks to social media, it’s easier than it’s ever been to find a date.
But while it may be a simple matter of logging on to your dating app of choice and setting something up, this world of easy dating lends itself well to be ghosted.
Have you ever thought of asking why you were ghosted? One intrepid TikToker decided to find out.
A quick vocabulary lesson.
If, like me, your relationship predates the rise of dating apps, you might not be familiar with the term “ghosted.”
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In essence, it refers to completely ignoring someone and breaking off contact. It isn’t about letting someone down nicely, or having a breakup discussion. It refers to completely ignoring the other person until they go away.
TikToker Danielle got ghosted recently.
Danielle found a guy on Bumble and thought they were hitting it off. Then, without any explanation, the guy simply vanished.
Danielle’s curiosity got the better of her. Rather than leaving it alone, she reached out to the guy.
Here’s the video.
“I was wondering if you could give me a little inisight on why dating never really progressed with us?” Danielle wrote in her initial message to the guy.
To his credit, the guy gave up the ghosting and actually replied to the message.
Online dating is a “shag fest.”
This was at the crux of the guy’s response. Basically, he wrote, dating apps give him “too many options and variety,” leading to a full-blown “shag fest.”
I mean, it might be a disappointing response, but at least he’s honest.
Shag…fest?
I mean, I get that apps like Tinder make hookups extremely easy, but this random dude describing it all as a “shag fest” makes me cringe a little.
If I was in his shoes, I might just fall back on the old “it’s not you, it’s me,” excuse.
Commenters weighed in with their thoughts.
While I doubt it’s only men who are using dating apps for these purposes, I do appreciate this comment. Danielle may have been disappointed, he probably shouldn’t have ghosted her, but at least he gave her a direct answer when she asked.
A familiar story.
It would be hard now to imagine a world without dating apps. That said, any app that allows you to scroll through hundreds of potential romantic partners has to have some kind of long-term effect on how we view monogamy.
It’s kind of depressing, really.
For those who just want to settle down with a compatible partner, finding such a person in the world of online dating must feel like looking for a needle in a haystack. You know it’s in there, but how do you find it?
What are your thoughts?
When you’re ghosted, do you try to quickly move on, or does it bother you? Would you ever consider confronting the person who did the ghosting? If so, what answer would you want to hear?
Make sure to share your insights in the comments!
