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Woman Asks Husband for Vasectomy: Unfair Pressure or Justified Request?

by Diply Social Team
2 years ago
in Family
Reading Time: 14 mins read
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When it comes to family planning, things can get complicated. A woman, let’s call her ‘Jane’, and her husband, ‘John’, have one child. John has always been clear about not wanting more kids, a decision Jane has accepted. However, Jane’s birth control pill has been affecting her mental health, and last year, she got pregnant while off it. The couple’s decision to terminate the pregnancy was a tough one, especially for Jane, who felt unsupported by John. Now, she’s back on the pill, but she’s not happy about it. She’s suggested that John get a vasectomy, but he’s avoiding the topic. Is Jane wrong for asking this of John? ‍♀️

The One-Child Policy

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Pill Problems

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

The Unexpected Pregnancy

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

The Difficult Decision

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Post-Procedure Pain

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Back to the Pill

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

The Vasectomy Proposal

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Feeling Pressured

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

The Guilt Game

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Bodily Autonomy vs. Shared Responsibility

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Avoidance or Apprehension?

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Pushing for a Decision

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

Considering All Options

Image credit: suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489
suspicious_reach_489 | suspicious_reach_489

A Tale of Pills, Pressure, and Potential Vasectomies

In the aftermath of a difficult abortion, Jane finds herself back on the birth control pill, a medication that negatively impacts her mental health. She suggests that John, who is terrified of having more kids, consider a vasectomy. But John, haunted by a friend’s bad experience, keeps dodging the conversation. Jane feels she’s being fair, asking him to at least research the procedure. But John feels pressured, even though he hasn’t outright refused. Is Jane wrong for pushing the issue, or is John avoiding a necessary discussion? Let’s see what the internet has to say about this emotionally charged situation… ️

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NTA: Husband’s refusal to get a vasectomy is selfish and unfair

Image credit: nattyleilani | nattyleilani
nattyleilani | nattyleilani

NTA: He pressured you for an abortion. He’s the a**hole.

Image credit: CaptainMalForever | CaptainMalForever
CaptainMalForever | CaptainMalForever

He wants sex but not the responsibility? NTA.

Image credit: Themistocles_gr | Themistocles_gr
Themistocles_gr | Themistocles_gr

“No more sex.” – A bold move to assert boundaries.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

NTA, it’s fair to ask for a vasectomy.

Image credit: tipsytops2 | tipsytops2
tipsytops2 | tipsytops2

NTA for asking husband about vasectomy. Awful if he expects abortion.

Image credit: justmy2centsforyou | justmy2centsforyou
justmy2centsforyou | justmy2centsforyou

NTA. Husband wants sex without responsibility. Not acceptable.

Image credit: FryOneFatManic | FryOneFatManic
FryOneFatManic | FryOneFatManic

Husband wants autonomy, but not for his wife?

Image credit: MyGoldenDragon | MyGoldenDragon
MyGoldenDragon | MyGoldenDragon

NTA for requesting a vasectomy. Consider tubal ligation as well.

Image credit: rlezar | rlezar
rlezar | rlezar

“NTA. He wouldn’t pressure you to take the pill, he’ll just pressure you to get an abortion then abandon you when you do it! What a champ. Of course you can’t force him to get a vasectomy. But you can tell him you aren’t comfortable being in a sexual relationship where the full physical and mental burden of family planning falls to you. You will not continue to suffer side effects or have a surgery that is much more invasive than a vasectomy because he refuses to take any responsibility for himself. If that leads to no more sex and the likely end of your marriage, so be it.”

Image credit: lightwoodorchestra | lightwoodorchestra
lightwoodorchestra | lightwoodorchestra

NTA. Taking the pill affects your health, not fair for him.

Image credit: Tessa_Kamoda | Tessa_Kamoda
Tessa_Kamoda | Tessa_Kamoda

Engaging in birth control conversation: NTA, NAH, or ESH?

Image credit: wanderingmind47 | wanderingmind47
wanderingmind47 | wanderingmind47

NTA wants husband to take responsibility, but he’s hesitant.

Image credit: gizzle2019 | gizzle2019
gizzle2019 | gizzle2019

NTA. Your husband’s behavior is unfair and disrespectful. ‍⚕️

Image credit: mextrawork | mextrawork
mextrawork | mextrawork

NTA suggests pausing intimacy until mature conversation about vasectomy.

Image credit: terribleterrabyte | terribleterrabyte
terribleterrabyte | terribleterrabyte

NTA. Take control, leave him, and find happiness elsewhere.

Image credit: princessofperky | princessofperky
princessofperky | princessofperky

Her prerogative to not go back on the pill, his choice.

Image credit: JustMaintenance7 | JustMaintenance7
JustMaintenance7 | JustMaintenance7

Husband’s fear of vasectomy vs. pressure to take pill. NTA

Image credit: TheTask2020 | TheTask2020
TheTask2020 | TheTask2020

NTA. Asserting bodily autonomy and setting personal boundaries.

Image credit: NorthrnSwede | NorthrnSwede
NorthrnSwede | NorthrnSwede

“Guy feels pressured for vasectomy after pressuring abortion. NTA obviously.”

Image credit: pretenderist | pretenderist
pretenderist | pretenderist

NAH. Husband’s refusal to support pregnancy is sad. Can’t pressure him.

Image credit: PitifulWatercress7 | PitifulWatercress7
PitifulWatercress7 | PitifulWatercress7

Seek counseling for a tough situation.

Image credit: bjorgear | bjorgear
bjorgear | bjorgear

Condoms failed and other birth control is bad for her. ‍♀️

Image credit: ChrysosAU79 | ChrysosAU79
ChrysosAU79 | ChrysosAU79

Birth control responsibility debate: abortion, mental health, and pill methods

Image credit: ownbeeswax | ownbeeswax
ownbeeswax | ownbeeswax

“NTA, after suffering, it’s Lysistrata in my house. No snip, no me.”

Image credit: babyredhead | babyredhead
babyredhead | babyredhead

NTA: Men who pressure partners on birth control are a**holes

Image credit: skubes27iidc | skubes27iidc
skubes27iidc | skubes27iidc

NTA: Take control of your contraceptive choices and communicate openly.

Image credit: Eagle_Pancake | Eagle_Pancake
Eagle_Pancake | Eagle_Pancake

Woman stops taking pill, asks husband to handle birth control. NTA

Image credit: Dana07620 | Dana07620
Dana07620 | Dana07620

“NTA. Birth control should be a shared responsibility. “

Image credit: RidleyAteKirby | RidleyAteKirby
RidleyAteKirby | RidleyAteKirby

NTA: Husband needs to man up and get a vasectomy.

Image credit: Toyotafan123 | Toyotafan123
Toyotafan123 | Toyotafan123

NTA, husband’s manipulative pressure. Discuss options with OBGYN.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

NTA: Husband’s responsibility to prevent pregnancy after pressuring abortion.

Image credit: Affectionate-Hat-57 | Affectionate-Hat-57
Affectionate-Hat-57 | Affectionate-Hat-57

NTA. Communicate your feelings about abortion and body autonomy.

Image credit: kreeves9 | kreeves9
kreeves9 | kreeves9

NTA…fair request, but hypocritical stance on contraception.

Image credit: Elinbj | Elinbj
Elinbj | Elinbj

NTA: Husband should get vasectomy if he doesn’t want more kids

Image credit: Nathan_77 | Nathan_77
Nathan_77 | Nathan_77

NTA – Justified request or unfair pressure?

Image credit: tcsweetgurl | tcsweetgurl
tcsweetgurl | tcsweetgurl

NTA, but have you considered other birth control options?

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

NTA, husband should step up after witnessing labor and BC.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Woman shares her justified request for her husband’s vasectomy

Image credit: LAM_humor1156 | LAM_humor1156
LAM_humor1156 | LAM_humor1156

NTA: Woman requests husband’s vasectomy, highlights gendered birth control burden.

Image credit: sleepwalker34 | sleepwalker34
sleepwalker34 | sleepwalker34

Husband’s hypocrisy and manipulation leads to justified request for vasectomy.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Husband’s refusal to communicate: NTA, but serious f**king issues!

Image credit: hammocks_ | hammocks_
hammocks_ | hammocks_

NTA – Husband’s double standards: man up and face reality!

Image credit: princessharleigh | princessharleigh
princessharleigh | princessharleigh

NTA. Fair to ask husband for vasectomy after his pressure.

Image credit: ollyator | ollyator
ollyator | ollyator

NTA. Husband has 3 choices: vasectomy, condom, or abstinence.

Image credit: ODU2K1 | ODU2K1
ODU2K1 | ODU2K1

Husband’s hypocrisy: Unfair pressure on wife for vasectomy?

Image credit: Fettnaepfchen | Fettnaepfchen
Fettnaepfchen | Fettnaepfchen

NTA. Female birth control has side effects, vasectomies are safer.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Taking control of your own body and desires

Image credit: HappyLucyD | HappyLucyD
HappyLucyD | HappyLucyD

Husband’s immaturity puts unfair pressure on wife for vasectomy.

Image credit: pugfacekillaaa | pugfacekillaaa
pugfacekillaaa | pugfacekillaaa

Hypocritical husband refuses vasectomy but pressures wife for abortion.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Men’s desire for control over reproductive rights discussed.

Image credit: bdbaylor | bdbaylor
bdbaylor | bdbaylor

Woman suggests a clever strategy to address unfair pressure for vasectomy

Image credit: kaitou1011 | kaitou1011
kaitou1011 | kaitou1011

NAH. Respect each other’s autonomy. Find a compromise or move on.

Image credit: MatlockHolmes | MatlockHolmes
MatlockHolmes | MatlockHolmes

Vasectomy: Easy peasy or big damn baby?

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Shared responsibility: discuss options with doctor for fair contraception.

Image credit: CaChriSo | CaChriSo
CaChriSo | CaChriSo

NTA. His choice, his responsibility. No need to complicate things.

Image credit: ferociousFerret7 | ferociousFerret7
ferociousFerret7 | ferociousFerret7

NTA calls out double standard and challenges OP to stand firm.

Image credit: poopsiedaisie | poopsiedaisie
poopsiedaisie | poopsiedaisie

Huge double-standard: husband okay with abortion but scared of vasectomy?

Image credit: Sahris | Sahris
Sahris | Sahris

NTA: After he forced you into an abortion, fair request

Image credit: PasDeTout | PasDeTout
PasDeTout | PasDeTout

Empowered woman sets boundaries for birth control and reproductive choices.

Image credit: RueGman | RueGman
RueGman | RueGman

NTA. Communicate your needs and seek couples counseling for support.

Image credit: judge1492 | judge1492
judge1492 | judge1492

NTA: Husband’s fear is valid, but conversation about shared burden needed.

Image credit: Alseids | Alseids
Alseids | Alseids

He wants no baby but expects you to suffer? NTA!

Image credit: Nebelherrin | Nebelherrin
Nebelherrin | Nebelherrin

Bold ultimatum: vasectomy or 18 years of child support?

Image credit: GeeWhiskers | GeeWhiskers
GeeWhiskers | GeeWhiskers

NTA. Copper IUD as alternative to vasectomy, but snip is easier.

Image credit: A_wild_Mel_appears | A_wild_Mel_appears
A_wild_Mel_appears | A_wild_Mel_appears

NTA: Hypocritical husband pressured wife, now it’s his turn.

Image credit: Colly_fleur | Colly_fleur
Colly_fleur | Colly_fleur

No baby, no vasectomy?

Image credit: aeiou-y | aeiou-y
aeiou-y | aeiou-y

Husband’s bodily autonomy vs. wife’s request: Unfair or justified?

Image credit: redheadeddisaster | redheadeddisaster
redheadeddisaster | redheadeddisaster

Woman shares her justified request for husband’s vasectomy after multiple pregnancies

Image credit: NachoMama34 | NachoMama34
NachoMama34 | NachoMama34

“YTA, unfair double standards! His body, his choice. Just stop having sex.”

Image credit: FuckUsernameSettings | FuckUsernameSettings
FuckUsernameSettings | FuckUsernameSettings
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