Marrying someone quickly is always a risk.
You may not know who the person really is and haven’t had enough time to really test the relationship .
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While some marriages that were entered into quickly can work, that’s usually the exception, not the norm.
Enter: these 10+ “aha” moments from those who realized the latter.
TW: This article contains depictions or discussions of abuse and may be triggering to some readers.
When they cheated on them three days before the wedding
Cheating is one of the worst feelings a person can go through. It stings even worse when you find out that it happened three days before your wedding.
“Tried to be the bigger person and forgive, but found out she kept cheating on me. I asked for a divorce on our one year anniversary.”
When their ex ruined the honeymoon
“After a scuba adventure with her she could hardly walk because she got so burnt on her legs whereas my skin didn’t change. She then tried to convince me that it was all my fault because I didn’t force her to wear the sunscreen and that the honeymoon was ruined.” – Redditor fukenhimer
When things got physical
This Redditor shared that her husband choked her against a wall at a party for laughing at another guy’s joke.
While a lot of other stuff happened, she was in denial so it took her a while to “wake up” and leave him.
When they met another guy during Girl’s Night Out
“She went out for girls’ night and met a new friend named Nicole at a bar. Started texting her a lot, then going to hang out now and then. We had a baby at home and she kept trying to go hang out with this girl from another town over with no last name whom I was not allowed to meet. His real name was Wesley.” – Redditor NotTheMan378
When they got irrationally jealous
“I knew it was over when she started a fight at my Brothers funeral because female attendees were giving me hugs as part of condolences.”
Funerals are a stressful and emotional time as it is, so this Redditor absolutely didn’t need that.
When they got slapped for no reason
“The day after we got married when he slapped me across the face (hard and completely out of the blue). No argument, no conversation leading up to it, nothing. He said it wasn’t that hard of a hit, he was just kidding around, and I was being overdramatic.” – Redditor SHEnanigans0312
When their partner accused them of cheating… with their mother
We wish we were joking, but this Redditor actually shared that “she nearly killed me because she thought i was cheating from some texts that went to my mother.”
When their partner became a completely different person
“He had never gotten violent with me while dating, but as soon as we got married it was like a switch flipped and he was a COMPLETELY different person. It got worse very quickly, and I ended up filing for divorce 73 days after we got married.” – Redditor SHEnanigans0312
When they were extremely selfish
Your partner is supposed to be there for you when you need it most. Sadly, this Redditor didn’t get that when their ex said that her son’s suicide attempt interfered with his (ex’s) birthday party.
When their partner was in love with their step-brother
This is absolutely insane and something that this Redditor clearly didn’t see happening.
Unfortunately, it happened and it did one month after they got married.
When they found out their partner was cheating on them
You think you know someone, but how well can you really know someone who you married quickly?
This Redditor got a taste of that when their wife was sending Snapchats to the co-worker she was sleeping with.
When their partner was extremely controlling
“Just that crazy look in his eyes when I didn’t do the dishes to his standards… like he was going to hurt me. I should have left then because I was right.” – Redditor loveydovette
When they contracted an STD from their partner
“I went to my OB and after a test or two, she informed me I had contracted chlamydia. That’s when I knew. Turns out, my newlywed husband had been banging his coworker for months.” – Redditor GalacticPingvin
When their husband was sexting with the brother’s wife
It gets messier: the brother’s wife was also the bridesmaid at their wedding. “She felt guilty and told my dad who had to tell me,” they wrote . She also found pictures of him with other men and ones of him wearing makeup.
When they showed their true colors
“The day after the wedding when he poked me in the chest and said ‘you’re going to do what I say whether you like it or not’. Ugh. Big mistake.” – Redditor gardengarbage
When their partner used them for their money
This happened to this Redditor’s dad. When the new wife quit her job, she admitted that she was using him as her “cash cow.” Therapy didn’t help, as she refused to go back to work.
When they found out their partner wasn’t straight
This happened to a Redditor’s friend . They were a very religious couple who never had sex before marriage. The husband told her that he was gay two weeks before their one-year anniversary.
When their husband wrestled with their mom
“When I saw him wrestle on the floor with his mom, she was in her panties. I was 17, pregnant and I didn’t realize he was a momma’s boy.” – Redditor srachina
When this person saw what real love actually looks like
“When I began working with the elderly and saw what real love and lasting marriages looked like. I knew my ex wasn’t capable of that.” – Redditor DudeWheresMyJarODirt
When substance abuse started taking over.
Few if any marriages on this planet can survive the thralls of substance abuse. After this couple had several domestic disturbances fueled by heroin , they knew that they’d married too fast and needed to end it for both their sakes.
When they realized their significant other was a gambling addict.
Not all addiction comes in bottle and pill form. When this Redditor’s partner revealed a serious gambling problem, coupled with an intense pornography fixation, they decided that they needed to walk away.
When their partner stole their life savings.
Redditor Karma058 said they knew it was over “When he drained our bank account for a 2 day bender , then came home where my little brother, his gf, and 1 year old[sic] daughter were living as well.”
When they realized that marriage made them feel lonely.
When two people become completely codependent on one another, it often spells disaster. Reddit user SurprisedComrade explained that she and her husband got married because they felt it was the safe thing to do, but quickly realized it only made their feelings of despair worse.
When they discovered that their partner was having an affair…with the pastor.
The very same pastor who married them in the first place, I might add.
I’m not a very religious person, but these two have definitely broken more than their fair share of commandments with this.
When both partners came to terms with their poor mental health.
Reddit user MegaDrogie says that they don’t feel their marriage was a mistake, but fully admit that both they and their partner were not in the right frame of mind to get married.
When they were verbally assaulted at their own wedding.
If there’s one thing that a blushing bride does not want to be called on her wedding day, it’s the b-word. She most certainly doesn’t want to be publically belittled by her own husband. But alas, that’s exactly what happened to Redditor MrsMellowCake
When they realized that their partner was broke.
Reddit user scubadadmn says they knew they’d made a mistake “When I found out she was 3 months behind on her mortgage and hadn’t paid the water and sewer bill in 2 years, had a tax lien on her. And she tried to access my sons[sic] college savings to pay her debt.”
When they came home from a business trip to a trashed house.
According to vocah123 , the house was in such bad shape that they had to literally kick piles of garbage just to clear a path through the house.
Later on, they discovered that their partner had been having multiple affairs while they were away.
When their partner didn’t come home for a week after the wedding.
Instead of celebrating with his new bride, Reddit user DailyTacoTrux says that her husband spent an entire week holed up in an apartment with his best friend, completely ignoring her.
When their partner punched them for cheating…in a dream.
We’ve all had some pretty wild and imaginative dreams. But to punch the person lying next to you square in the mouth because they were unfaithful in your sleep? Who does that?!
When they realized they weren’t actually in love with their partner.
Redditor Meggamie when speaking about her husband said that “He eventually found out I had fallen for another person, I can’t even describe the pain he was emitting, it broke my heart.”
When their partner refused to tell them where they went on weekends.
If I disappeared for two days without a trace and offered up zero explanation for my whereabouts — I would be chopped, skewered, and flambeed.
Being able to answer a simple question like “where were you tonight?” is marriage 101.
When their partner complained about having to attend a funeral.
Your husband/wife/life partner — whatever you want to call it — they’re supposed to be your ride-or-die. You expect them to be there for you in your time of need.
What you don’t anticipate is having to deal with their bad attitude on the day of your grandmother’s funeral .
When they had a full-blown panic attack right before the wedding.
Everyone gets nervous the day of their wedding; cold feet are only natural. But if your body is violently convulsing _ and literally revolting against what you’re trying to do — perhaps you’d better listen to it.
When they found out that they lied about having kids.
According to Redditor Pheonix3434, his wife only told him about her 5 children after they’d already gotten married.
On top of that, she said she was only 30 when in reality she was actually 45.
