The world of online dating can be pretty tricky. You have to navigate through a sea of catfishes , incomplete profiles, and total duds . But if you’re lucky, you might just find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
It’s estimated that about a quarter of young Americans have gone on a date with someone they met on a dating app.
RELATED STORIES
Young women in particular tend to be more likely to have negative online dating experiences.
Women in their young 20s are more likely to be subject to unwanted advances and explicit photos, making navigating a dating app all the more difficult and exhausting.
And then… there are people who make profiles like these.
Twitter user Aubry Andrews posted a hilariously out of touch dating profile that someone likely uses in all earnest (which is honestly kind of concerning, if he actually gets any matches).
But let’s face it, with a profile like this, he probably doesn’t get a lot of matches anyway.
Paul describes himself as a 27-year-old YouTuber who lives somewhere around Austin. He’s also apparently open-minded and fun, and yet has a list of “requirements” for any woman who wishes to date him.
Let’s go through the list, shall we?
1. Must be taller than 5’9″.
Fun fact: the average height for American women is 5’4″ . That’s not to say that incredibly tall women don’t exist, but considering Paul is looking for someone at least five inches taller than the average, that probably won’t work out well.
2. Must make $100k per year.
So, not only is he looking for an incredibly tall woman, he’s also looking for one whose yearly income is in the six digits. This ideal woman is getting more and more mythical by the second.
3. Must be under 125 pounds.
Okay… so first of all, the number on the scale doesn’t matter, especially if you’re more athletic (and will therefore weigh more because of muscle). But if somebody is over 5’9″ and less than 125 pounds… they’re probably not in a healthy place.
4. Must be loveable and funny.
This might be the only “requirement” on the list that isn’t completely delusional. But that, like, also describes pretty much every woman (and man, and non-binary person, for that matter). It’s definitely subjective, though.
5. No guy friends.
Okay, huge red flag here. If somebody has a problem with the gender of your friends, they’re probably not somebody you want to waste time dating. I’m willing to bet Paul has some female friends, too.
6. Limited girl friends.
So let me get this straight. He wants someone who’s tall and successful and has a sense of humor and sparkling personality… but she also needs to be a hermit who’s only allowed to have a few friends, and they can only be girls and not boys. Got it.
7. No pets.
This seems kind of random, to be honest. On its own, this wouldn’t be a problem (some people have allergies and might not get along with someone who has a pet). But alongside the other “requirements,” this just seems like he wants someone who only has attention for him.
8. No kids.
Yeah, see the last point. Being a potential step-parent isn’t what everyone wants when navigating relationships. But again, it feels more like a “you need to be available for me and only me 24/7” kind of deal in this context.
9. Less than 5 previous partners.
This list truly gets worse and worse as it goes down. Sure, some people only have a couple of serious relationships in their lives. But many others have multiple partners before they settle down (and that’s perfectly okay!). This as a “requirement” is just weird.
10. Must be moderate in politics.
In any other dating profile, this would be a pretty reasonable request. There are plenty of people who would feel more comfortable dating people with similar political ideologies.
But from Paul… it reads as controlling.
11. Must be available at least 6 days a week.
I’m a little confused. Is this guy looking for a girlfriend, or is he interviewing somebody for a job? Because this seems pretty corporate to me. And again, controlling.
12. Must be a gamer.
It almost feels like this is supposed to be one of those traits that (some) men think set certain women apart from others. But the reality is, nearly half of American women play video games , but rampant sexism in the community keep them from actually identifying as “gamers.”
13. Must be a 9/10 at least.
Being attractive to someone is pretty subjective. But the whole idea of ranking someone based on their physical appearance is kind of icky. I’m pretty sure any woman Paul would consider a 9/10 would have more self-worth than to want to date someone whose profile says they’re looking for a 9/10.
14. Must be under the age of 22.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s perfectly fine to be 22 and date someone who’s 27 (and vice versa). But the flip of this is that he’s actively excluding women who are slightly older. What, are women 23 and up too old?
Also, what kind of 22-year-old makes $100k a year?
Understandably, the internet had a field day with this incredibly outlandish profile.
To most (if not all) commenters, it seems like Paul’s looking for a woman who most definitely doesn’t exist. And if she does, she probably isn’t on Tinder.
The hypocrisy is real, though.
So, like, what exactly does being open-minded mean if you’re also providing a list of requirements for any woman who might want to date you? Because that’s literally the opposite of being open-minded.
It looks like Paul is going to have to keep searching for his dream girl.
Something tells me he’ll be searching for a long time. Possibly forever. And you know what? I (like the rest of Twitter) don’t feel bad about that in the slightest.
What do you think? Let us know in the comments!
