Transwoman Refuses to Use Friend’s Preferred Pronouns

Imagine being part of a tight-knit group of friends, all supportive of each other’s identities. You’ve created a safe space where everyone feels comfortable sharing their pronouns. But what happens when someone’s preferred pronouns trigger painful memories for you? This is the dilemma faced by a 27-year-old transwoman who refused to use a new friend’s preferred pronouns, causing tension within the group. Let’s dive into the story.

A Supportive Circle of Friends

Introducing Ourselves with Pronouns ️

A New Member Joins the Group

Feeling Uncomfortable

A Painful History with ‘It’

Seeking an Alternative Pronoun

An Angry Response

The Fallout Begins ️

The Pronoun Dilemma: Respecting Boundaries or Triggering Pain?

In a group of supportive LGBTQ+ friends, a new member (D) joins and shares that their preferred pronouns are it/its. However, our 27-year-old transwoman protagonist feels uncomfortable using these pronouns, as they bring back painful memories of high school bullying. She asks D if there’s an alternative pronoun she could use, but D becomes angry and leaves. Now, the friend group is aware of the situation and our protagonist is feeling guilty. Let’s see what people have to say about this delicate situation… ️

Respecting pronouns is uncomfortable but necessary. YTA verdict given.

Opposition to neopronouns and the use of ‘it’ as a pronoun

User struggles with using ‘it/its’ pronouns for friend

Defending the use of preferred pronouns, NTA for OP

User defends not using preferred pronouns, suggests avoiding reference.

Trans person refuses to use friend’s preferred pronoun ‘it’

Debating the use of ‘it’ as a pronoun

User expresses confusion about ‘it/its’ pronouns respectfully

Respect preferred pronouns, YTA. Don’t prioritize your feelings over theirs.

Respecting preferred pronouns is important, but some struggle with it

Using ‘it’ is not legitimate and takes away from others

Respect works both ways. Autonomy should not be disregarded. NTA.

User struggles with using non-traditional pronouns, draws the line at ‘Neo’ pronouns

Respect people’s pronouns. YTA for refusing to do so.

Respectful conversation about preferred pronouns, discomfort acknowledged

Navigating pronouns can be tricky, but refusing to try isn’t okay

NTA defends use of proper pronouns in heated debate

Using reclaimed pronouns is a personal choice, not an obligation. Soft YTA if you refuse to use D’s preferred pronouns.

Respectful suggestion to refer to friend by name instead of ‘it’

Using ‘it’ for a person is insulting, not the same as names. NTA.

Choosing ‘it/its’ as preferred pronouns is dehumanizing. NTA.

Gender-neutral pronouns suggested to avoid dehumanizing language

Choosing pronouns shouldn’t be this complicated

Language is a medium of communication, you cannot force people. NTA.

Respecting preferred pronouns can be uncomfortable but necessary.

Choosing preferred pronouns is important, but using ‘d’ is demeaning. NTA.

Using someone’s name instead of their preferred pronouns is reasonable

The importance of using preferred pronouns in conversations

Trans person explains why using ‘it’ as a pronoun is dehumanizing

Debate over preferred pronouns and their impact on individuals

Using inanimate pronouns is appropriation, NTA for not doing so

Using ‘it’ to refer to a person is damaging and traumatic

User defends not using friend’s preferred pronouns with flawed argument

Respectful compromise on using non-traditional pronouns

Curious about using “it/it’s” instead of “them/they”. NTA, just poor communication.

Respecting preferred pronouns is important, but reactions are inevitable ‍♀️

Using ‘it’ pronoun for a person is a sore spot

NTA defends use of preferred pronouns, calls ‘it’ dehumanizing

Comparing preferred pronouns to derogatory slurs. NTA.

A cis person asks for understanding and handles it respectfully

Avoiding people who use unconventional pronouns to avoid self-harm

Using ‘it’ as a pronoun can be hurtful for trans people

Empathetic comment advises respecting friend’s neopronouns. YTA, apologize.

A divisive post with no clear verdict, agree to disagree.

User questions friend’s preferred pronouns as potential kink/fetish.

Unpopular opinion on neo pronouns being illogical and socially inappropriate.

Respect everyone’s pronouns or don’t expect respect for yours

Respecting gender identity without dehumanizing language

Using ‘it/its’ as pronouns is uncomfortable, NTA for refusing.

Using the wrong pronouns isn’t the same as a slur

Discussion on pronoun usage and queer/transphobia in language.

Respect preferred pronouns even if you don’t understand them

Respecting preferred pronouns can be difficult for some, NAH.

Navigating preferred pronouns can be difficult, even with good intentions.

Debating the use of preferred pronouns and offensive language

Navigating sensitive pronouns can be difficult, NTA explains why.

Respectful refusal to use ‘it’ pronoun, citing history and discomfort.

Using ‘it’ as pronouns seems objectifying. Avoid pronouns or step away.

Confusion around pronoun usage in trans community

Respect your friend’s pronouns and seek therapy for yourself. YTA

Navigating pronouns can be difficult, but empathy is key

Using ‘it’ as an insult is hurtful. NTA for feeling uncomfortable.

OP respectfully asked for preferred pronoun, D reacted unreasonably. NTA

Trans woman shares personal struggle with preferred pronouns

Respecting preferred pronouns is not changing one’s identity

Respecting preferred pronouns is important, but so is trauma history

Respect people’s identity, even if it makes you uncomfortable. YTA

Debating the use of ‘it’ as a pronoun. NTA.